I so want to adopt a baby.....

[Tanya1966]

 It's kind of a long story, but I feel as if I need to get it out, otherwise I might break down, it hurts so bad!  When I was reading the Word (several months ago) I'd came across the scripture where in James 1:27 it says, 'Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit the orphans and widows in their distress, and keep oneself unstained by the world.'   Well? I can't explain it, only someone who knows how the Lord works, could understand, but I felt like He spoke to me, to tell me He wanted me to do more than just "visit." I felt as though I were being called to bring one of those orphaned children into my home and into my heart, to adopt a child and raise them, to love and nurture, and to bring them up knowing the Lord.  Anyway, since then, I've went through a time that I figured I was just making it all up in my own head and I tried to ignore it. I figured I was just going through some emotional turmoil, what with my oldest getting ready to graduate, maybe dealing with pre-empty nest issues or something, right?(even though I do still have an 11yr. old here with me) and my son is not leaving, just grown up.... But I kept praying. I prayed that somehow I could come to have peace over the fact that my privilege of mothering my son...well? Those days are coming to an end. I mean, I'll always be his mom, but he doesn't need me doating over him any longer...tear...I pray constantly that the Lord continues to cover my son and keep him safe, because I can no longer protect him (as if the Lord hasn't had His hand on the both of us all this time?! Smile!) I have prayed for the Lord to reveal to me if those things which I previously stated were from Him? Or just all in my head?? To be honest, it doesn't feel any different than when I first heard Him. I just know in my knower that God did not give me all this love in my heart, not to give it away. So I've gone online and I've started doing as much research as I can about adoption. It's not cheap, let me tell you!! But I now feel commited to do what I need to, to accomplish this goal.******ROAD BLOCK!***** I tried to share this with my DH quite a while back, he said no, but then said he would also pray about it. (hope beyond all hope, he said he would)  I truly have tried not to bug him about it, ask, or even talk about it, but it's been like a shaken up soda, bubbling ever closer to the top....so here just yesterday, I sent him a text, asking him please? Can't we see about adopting a baby? I knew he was too busy to reply, just putting a reminder on his mind. Then today, I decided to ask him him if he had thought about it? He can only give me all the reasons why he doesn't think it's a good idea. We've been married for 8yrs., my kids aren't his, his girls are grown, and not mine. Neither of us can have children now, but still I would like to share in this with him because we would both be the parents of this little one. I love my DH very much and very much want to share this experience in life with him, but he is saying no to all my hopes, and to my calling...my heart is breaking....

[babycakes254]

Mar. 13, 2009 at 12:31 AM

I'm hoping you guys will be blessed as we have been with Bryson since before he left us. Someday we want another child (either biological or adopted, doesn't matter). I know how you are feeling!

[Tanya1966]

Mar. 13, 2009 at 12:36 AM

Thanks! I was hoping I didn't sound like a crazy person?!

(Original Poster)

[Chrissy2944]

Mar. 15, 2009 at 12:40 PM

I agree hubs and I plan to adopt two more...I will pray for you and your hubs! and you can help me start a movement! lol I would like to see every Christian household adopt at least one child!

[onethentwins]

Mar. 29, 2009 at 3:03 AM

You say that you want to adopt an orphan...well just so you know infants are not orphans. There are about 40 couples wanting to adopt for every infant that comes available and they will pay dearly for them. Usually between 20 to 40 thousand dollars. The amount of money these couples are willing to pay and the money the agencies and lawyers can make has resulted in a lot of unethical practices in getting vulnerable women in crisis pregnancy to relinquish their babies. It's far from Christian like!!

International adoption can be just as bad. Kidnappings occur, again because it's big business. You have to be really careful and do plenty of research on which country you want to adopt from.

If you want to give a home to a child who really needs one, then look to the Foster Care System where the children's parents have already had their rights terminated, and the children are at risk of not being adopted and aging out of the system. That really would be a Christian thing to do :)

[Tanya1966]

Mar. 29, 2009 at 8:10 PM

This is a response to the last posted comment. I certainly did not intend to offend anyone with my journal post, whether by being politically incorrect, or by being a Christian (though on here so often times it seems to be very unpopular to have faith in one God, and Lord Jesus Christ)  I would like to say that I do indeed understand the difference between an infant and an orphan, and that I also understand by looking at your jounaled posts why it seemed  like you had a bitter taste in your mouth as you replied to mine. I can understand why you would react in such a way, and I am truly sorry for your loss. My heart really does go out to you. I was meerly spilling my guts in this journal, because I don't feel as if anyone I know will truly hear and understand how much I long to have another child(see? now I'm sitting here crying...) and I really do feel as if God has put it on my heart, because He's the one who has blessed me with all this love to give. You yourself know how much you love your children, I have more love than was able to have children. Does that make sense? I have had a crazy life, that no one knows but me. And God. I know what loss is, so just as I do not judge you, please don't judge me?

(Original Poster)

[onethentwins]

Mar. 30, 2009 at 6:17 PM

I'm not judging you and I didn't intend to come of as judgemental. My intention was to inform you as to the practices of Infant Adoption and International Adoption because many people believe they are helping a child, when in fact they are causing more harm. I know you don't want to cause harm, you want to give love to a child that needs it.

I'm sorry I made you cry, I'm sorry if my post comes off as bitter, I wasn't offended in the least and I'm sorry if I offended you.

[mommytoadam]

Mar. 31, 2009 at 8:42 AM

It IS possible to adopt an infant through the state foster care system as we were able to do that.  There is some emotional risk involved since you are fostering to adopt, but it is possible to do.  :-)