Dentists and Kids

[lilysmommy8503]

So, my Lily, has weak enamel on her teeth, especially the top ones.  She developed tiny brown spots by 18 months old. 

We went to the pediatric dentist "Kool Smiles" in Fort Wayne IN.  I left in tears, never went back.  They wouldn't let me be with her, after arguing they let me in a room with a window so we could see each other.  They wanted to operate, put on all sorts of crowns and fillings and strap her to a papoose board at 18 Months Old!  They threatened me that if I didn't do it that it would ruin her adult teeth because of her dental caries.  I called every other dentist on the insurance list not a single one would see her until age 3.  So, we didn't go.

Fast Forward 1 1/2 years....we had just moved to Eau Claire WI.  Near her third birthday, she complained of pain in her teeth on the top right side.  I hesitantly tried to schedule with All Family Dental's pediatric dentist because our insurance covers basically only them for kids under 8.  They couldn't get us in to even look at her tooth for 3-4 weeks, so I booked with Herbert Dental.  Lily loved Dr. T and the staff.  They are exceptional!  The assistant explained what items were and demonstrated the noises everything made before the dentist came in, plus they let me be with her the whole time.  She had 4 cavities, the ones hurting were really deep and required a root canal.  The split it into two appointments and fixed the two small front ones first to see how she would do.  They only numbed her gums and she successfully at 3, participated in it all while watching me for reassurance.  They even offered for me to lie on the chair and her to lay on me for comfort, but she wanted to be a big girl.  There rooms aren't that big, but they are an amazing staff.  The front teeth had chipped twice - since it wasn't causing pain, we didn't fix it again after the second time.

I scheduled cleanings months ago with All Family Dental, since our insurance doesn't cover the other practice and we don't have the funds, it cost us $700 for the procedures the first time.  Well, Dr. Steve at All Family Dental examined my kids after their cleanings.  He said good things about my 17 months old son, but told me that Lily had at least 10 cavities, has severe rot in her lower molars and has an abscess tooth that needs extracted anda stainless steel spacer needs placed in her mouth.  He also, in a room full of people, after disagreeing with me when I answered some of his questions truthfully, verbally attacked me and told me I was the cause of my daughters teeth problems because I breastfed her and co-slept.  The staff told me we could either, sedate her and take care of it all at once or we could do it all over 3 appointments, but I couldn't be with her at either of the times.  Plus, they couldn't even get her in until June 9th.  If it is as bad as he makes it out to be, how can we have to wait so long?

I wrote a complaint letter, refusing that he treat or see my children again.  The office scheduled me for a second opinion with the dentist in charge of the practice.  He took two x-rays, said she has more cavities than originally thought, the tooth does need extracted but the metal spacer doesn't need put in until age 5 1/2 or 6 and that she needs two crowns on the chipped teeth in the front.  He was pleasant, but his assistant did most of his talking.  She was rather rude.  I do have to say their office staff wasn't pleasant either.  Their hygienist were great and the lady in their playroom was friendly.  I have spoken with 5-6 parents that have said they will never take their child back to this practice.  A few even said their child had a handshaped bruise on their face after having work done.  When I was in the office for the second opinion, their was a terrified 6-7 year old needing 3 teeth pulled.  She was crying and clinging to her mother and they refused her staying with her child.

I took her back to Dr. T at Herbert today for a 2nd opinion.  He said he felt that she had at least 6 cavities that he could see.  He thought the one tooth might need extracted but that he would attempt to fix it first and he would fix the cracked teeth in the front and didn't feel at this time that caps were necessary, since she would be starting to lose teeth in another 1-2 years.  Since the cracked teeth and the abscess tooth, were located where he did the work one year ago, he offered to fix them for no cost, stating that he stands behind his work and that Lily was excellent at age 3 and should be even better for sitting through the procedures at age 4.  He also recommended I let her chew gum with xylitol in it as often as possible to help strengthen the enamel on her upper teeth.  He said it is possible that the one tooth may need to be extracted, but he would try to avoid that on a 4 year old if possible.  He also suggested brushing even without toothpaste 2 times a day was great and suggested trying to get her to use a mouthwash that you spit out to help with the enamel.  She is scheduled for April for the fixes. 

I really struggle with whether or not to proceed with the other cavities or wait for them to fall out.  Also, I wish we had unlimited funds, so that we could afford whichever dentist we chose or that the insurance company would supplement our choice and we pay the difference.  I also wonder if All Family Dental was/is trying to use my daughter as a "cash cow" with unnecessary procedures and caps on baby teeth.

A friend gave me the link to the 20/20 story on another dentist chain for kids.  http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/1414752/Do_you_take_your_child_to_Small_Smiles_Caution

A.  Why are parents not allowed to stay with their "minor" child especially young ones at the certain dentists?

B.  The term "pediatric dentist" makes me think child-friendly, but our experience has been anything but.

C. The Pediatric Dental Association states that the "papoose" board for strapping is only used in 6% of cases, but that sure doesn't seem to be what I am finding as I research and talk with other moms.

D.  Why does it seem like parents/moms never talk about this?  Maybe we could change some things if we unite and stand up to the bully dentists.

I am just all around frustrated, I guess.

[Dani32]

Mar. 13, 2009 at 3:38 PM

I took my children to the dentist when their first tooth errupted.  I was asked to stay in the waiting area so my son wouldn't be distracted..get up in the middle of the procedure.  However, if I did want to go back, it would be fine.  He had 1 and 1/2 teeth.  Checked and cleaned for 10.00.  Hunter had 3 teeth checked and cleaned for 10 bucks.  They were great. 

I would stay away from that dentist.  Rude, non caring, etc...

[Elsasmom]

Mar. 13, 2009 at 4:25 PM

This makes me so nervous about taking Elsa, although my old dentist I know would be great with her even though it's a bit of a drive, I may have to do it. She's just a regular dentist, do they have to be "pediatric"? I feel so bad for Lily, that's so sad that she has to go through all this at her age. Honestly though, I'd probably just see if I can work out a payment plan with the good dentist than to go back to the nasty ones. I know it sucks to have to pay when you have coverage for others, but I feel like those other ones really are milking the "cash cow" as you mentioned and in the long run you'd be better off. Cuz what would the ultimate cost of her having unnessary work be? That is very troubling, though, that they don't want you present. I absolutely wouldn't do it, I'm too paranoid about what they'd be doing without me around. Sorry this got long, I'm just in disbelief over this.