The Dividing Point: Blood vs. Marriage

[sour_blueberry]

Almost everyone has to deal with a step family member in their life time. I've had mine with my step-mother and step-brothers. But after time I was able to move away, far-far away. My step-mother is the controlling one in the family. It seems to be that one parent that is in charge, their children are the one's that get treated right. I can spend all day talking about the horrors I went through living with my step-mom (I think I already posted something about that a long time ago). But what I want to talk about is my in-laws.

 

My husbands parents divorced when he was very young (father is now passed away). His mother remarried to the man she cheated with her first husband. Her name is E and her new husband (my step-father-in-law) is FD (F is for father). E has 4 children, L is the oldest and she is adopted, HB is the oldest boy, BK is the only girl, and then there is my hubby T. FD has only two sons: DJ and L. T and DJ are only a week apart. Growing up there had always been a dividing point with FD. All the kids got along great and E treated all the kids the same. But FD did not treat them all the same. HB was already grown and married when E and FD married, so he was safe. BK, since she was a she, she got treated like blood. But since T looked just like his father, FD treated him like dirt. T overlooked it through his life and spent his youth living with his father till he passed away, then he lived with friends till he was 18.

 

Now years later (4 years ago) my husband got a job with FD. Things were great; they were getting along and working on cars together. Until 6 months latter when DJ started working there. DJ started bossing T around and FD let it go on. Then FD started treating T like dirt again. After some time T got transferred to another location because him and FD got into a fight. T was off the clock leaving when FD got into his face. Long story short T got transferred and FD didn't.

 

About a year latter they moved T back since he was the only one who could do the job he was doing. But his time FD was his boss. T put up with the job until DJ was moved up to the supervisor position. Then to make it all worse DJ's wife R started working there. T just kept to himself and did his job.

 

Now to present time: T got laid off!!!!! WTF!?! Another employee was starting stuff with T and T didn't want to have anything to do with it. Well this guy kept on, kept on trying to start stuff. So T told DJ he needed to do something about it. Nothing was done. So T told DJ he was going home before something is started and that DJ needed to do something with the other employee by time he comes back tomorrow. Well this was at 8am yesterday. DJ waited till 4:30pm to call my cell phone trying to get a hold of T. (long story short but DJ has been after me for years, asking T for nude pic's of me and everything, always trying to flirt with me and even stalked me at my last job). I told him that I was at school and that he needed to call T. It took me 5 times telling him of this before he finally hung up the phone. T said that DJ fired him because he "walked out of the job" witch is B-S! After T calling the main bosses, he was told that they were looking at laying off 5 people and that because T couldn't get along with DJ, then he was out of a job.

 

It kills me the most because this is supposed to be family! Family does not do this! But it's all about the FD and HIS kids and to the hell with E and her kids. Even BK is no longer accepted by FD!

 

About 2 weeks ago E and FD has a football party at their house. DJ and his family were invited and L and his family were invited. But not E's kids!!!! BK happened to stop by and her son went to watch the game with the guys. Well her son was making noises and so DJ yelled at him and told him the "Shut Up!" Every good parent knows that you do not tell another person's kids to shut up unless you are the one watching them, you go tell the parent. BK got angry and got her kids and left. Nothing was said to DJ about this. BK's daughter has a birthday party and she did not want to invite DJ and his family because of what had happened. But FD kept pushing it and so she did. Yet when DJ had his kid's birthday party we were not invited and nothing was said to him! Now does this sound right?

 

I just don't understand why people treat people they grew up with like this? It like if you are not blood then to the hell with you! Now my husband has no job and no one is hiring here because we just had over 6 companies close and their employees are looking for a job too. This is just not right!!! I don't know how we are going to pay our bills! I'm a college student; we have a car payment, a house payment! Our anniversary is this Friday. We had a big weekend planned and now I have to cancel it! This was going to be our first weekend away from our daughter. We were going to stay at a Hampton in Gatlinburg. We were going to eat at the Hard Rock Café and I was going to have my first "adult" drink since Chloe was not going to be with us. Things were looking up for us. We were paying our bills. We were doing stuff on the weekends with Chloe. We need a new roof on our house (we have a leak in the 3^rd bed room so we can not use that room). Our heating and air does not work (good weather right now, no hurry). I just don't know what to do? How can family do this?