Did I Do The Right Thing?

[randi1978]

A few days ago, I actually sent my ex husband an email updating him about our daughter.  I did not expect him to respond, but strangely, he did.  He asked about her, how she was doing, if she remembered him, etc.  I responded with all the cool things that happen to 5 yr olds: loose teeth, tooth fairy, school, going into kindergarten, etc.

So, for a few days our emails were pretty consistent and I was happy that he was taking an interest, something he had not done in 2 yrs.

It was after I responded to a question about her birthday that I began to question his motives.  While I find it damned pathetic that a parent cannot remember their own child's birthdate, usually most remember the month and year.  He couldn't even remember that.  But the question was too specific.  He wanted the month, day and year.

So now I am wondering if I did the right thing.  I only wanted to do what is right for Michelle.  Since I moved, I sent him my new address and phone number.  I am doubting my actions now.  All I wanted was for Michelle and her father to have something of a relationship, but now I worry that he will use the info given to him to try to get custody of her (he lives in a different state).   I don't have the energy to fight him again.  And to make matters worse, his new wife comes from $$$, which means she could get him a lawyer and I would be up shit creek, I think.

I am now worried that I will open the door to find a courier handing me court papers.  Granted, I would probably write the courts back telling them where to shove the papers and would never hand her over to him, I just don't want the headache.

I just wanted to do the right thing for my daughter.  And now I fear it may blow up in my face.

[blessed3times]

Mar. 18, 2009 at 6:43 PM

That's pretty creepy that he couldn't even remember the YEAR of her birth??!?  Good Lord...

I certainly hope he does not try anything legal, but if he did wouldn't you be able to tell the courts that he hasn't paid child support or come to see her - stuff like that?

I would think info like that would go a long way towards preventing him from getting custody, no matter HOW much money his wife has!

Hope it's nothing to worry about, but keep us posted.

[MyBelovedOnes]

Mar. 19, 2009 at 6:58 PM

I don't know but I sure would have left well enough alone.  I would have let him be the one to make the first move seeing how he is the one that disappeared.  All you can do now is just keep a close eye on things and keep him at arms reach.  I hope he's not got ill toward you again.