Raising talented children

[IhrkeGirl]

Everybody knows about some crazy kid that has grown up doing one activity their whole life and is the envy of every kid who feels like they don't have a unique talent. I've decided to find a way with my own kids to let them explore to find their talent. It seemed like a really daunting task at first because there are so many different things to do like ballet, karate, any instrument, and more that I can't think of right now.

The big problem is that you can't just stick your kid in a class that you think they would be good in and make them participate. You also can't just stick them in a class for something that they said they wanted to do because they might change their mind, very quickly too.

I started thinking on this because extracarricular activities are extremely important to me. I know that they keep kids in school, and interested in school. I know this because not every child is a scholar. I liked school but what kept me interested were not core classes. I assure you, i did fine in school but I have more friends who only graduated because of the help of a single teacher who taught an extracarricular activity. In fact in my high school this teacher was up for consideration several times to have his class removed so that he could teach a "more academic class" his boss though saw the results that this teacher had on keeping would be drop outs in school and defended him and this teacher is now 10 years from retirement at this same high school and his program he developed for his class ( he teaches TV production) has more evidence of getting "delinquents" graduated than most of the core classes.

As I was saying, sorry for the tangent, when I was in kindergarten I wanted to do ballet. Mostly because I had watched a ballerina in a movie or on TV and it gave me this tingly feeling as i watched her and I was entranced by the dancing. When my mom put me into a beginners ballet class with my cousin soon after I hated the class. I still loved the dancing but we were doing stretches so create flexibility, and learning these really easy steps. I wanted to do the dancing, prancing around like the pretty ballerina. I told my mom that I didn't like the class because we weren't doing anything that I thought was ballet. She took me out of the class, but I still wanted to dance. she didn't push me, didn't say I had to finish that class term or anything. i was out before the next weeks class. Later I asked for ballet classes again but because I had never stayed in it as a child to see where the instructor was taking us or having it explained to me at the same time with encouragement from my mom that this is where all ballerina's started, I had to start in a beginners class again. I was the oldest by several years, and the tallest.

Naturally I didn't like that either so I quit again; and again before the term ( really ballet classes mostly last the same as a school year) ended. I also tried piano, I quit the first time because i didn't like the pressure coming from my older sister, it wasn't supportive pressure it was just pressure. When I started piano again my sister had moved out, and several moves forced me to quit and restart with various teachers. I don't play piano above a level 3 or 4 (not very good), but my favorite is playing a duet.

So far I've introduced that I like dancing, and that I like Piano. I am not good at either and I was never taught to finish what I start. My nephew Gabe on the other hand was raised under my oldest sisters parenting. when he decided he like baseball, he enrolled in a rec team. He soon learned that he did not like it at all. But his parents said "you signed up for it, you made the commitment, you need to keep that commitment and finish the season." Not so bad right? I mean one summer of baseball. Still, next he wanted to try soccor, and again he had to finish the season and then decided that sports were not for him.

Next he tried gymnastics, and as I understand it depending on where you go for instruction a gymnastics class can last for half a school year or a whole school year. So I will call is a term. My nephew tried gymnastics and enjoyed it so much he did 3 consecutive terms of it until he didn't like it anymore. Keep in mind now that these are not competitive you have to win classes. They are recreational, doing it for fun, doing it for whatever reason, but these instructors are not like high school and sometimes middle school instructors that want you to win. they were only there to teach.

After gabe's third term of gymnastics he decided he was done, he still has flexibility, balance, and a quickness that shows from that class, but now he is on to instruments and is learning guitar. It makes it really nice for him though. If you ask him if he has ever quit he will tell you that he has tried a lot of different things, but he has never quit. Mind you Gabe's whole story is from the past 4-5 years. He hasn't found what really interests him yet. But he has talent, you should see him walk around when it is pouring cats and dogs outside, down a muddy slope. he doesn't stumble, trip, slide. he stays balanced the whole time. Even if you try to make him fall his balance is incredible! That is a talent that he picked up from gymnastics. I haven't heard him play his guitar so I dont know what to tell you about that.

Another example of my oldest sisters method is my neice. she started ballet classes as soon as she was old enough to join ( the one in her area has a minimum age). she started out with one class, didin't really like it at first but with encouragement and having to finish the term she found that she did really like it. As her leg muscles grew and she got older she was required to take so many classes at a time. this coming school year is will be required to take 3 classes to condition her legs, she will be going up on point, and she is only turning 10. When she could only take one ballet class she experimented by taking a jazz class, or a tap class, at the same time as that ballet class. She tried all sorts of different beginner classes that her dance school offered while she could only take one ballet class. She found that she truly did want to stick with ballet. so when she could take two ballet classes she did and it kind of put a stop to the other experimental classes but those other classes also helped her physically (leg muscles remember) but also mentally since she wants to be a choreographer. she found what she liked very early on. She also likes horses too.

She had horses and she works with them, rides them, she is a very busy little girl. her mother has more to dowith the horses though.

I think what I am getting at is that to raise talented children, or to help them find their talent you really need to encourage them. Not just, "your doing a good job" "stick with it" "you'll get better" "just try again" but real encouragement to stay with a program until it's term is ended. It is extremely hard to see the end goal if everyday your steps seem so small. It doesn't matter if its dance, 4H, gymnastics, martial arts, arts, music, baking/cooking. Everybody needs to be encouraged. If it's not their thing when the allotted term is over have them pick something else. Just remember that that something else could be chess club. Not everybody is an academic scholar.

My sister loves horses and she joined a horse drill team (think high school drill teams, only horses with riders). she had to spend more than a month with an instructor learning how to ride her horse relaxed enough that she wasn't giving it two different commands. Even though my sister has a farm, with 3 ridable horses her legs tense while she rides. For one month, she would go to this instructor with her horse and the instructor would take the stirrups off the saddle so that my sister had to let her feet hang and relax her legs. This first month was just walking the horse around, maybe some trotting or galloping. They started a second month of doing the same thing except the second month they started doing jumps, without the stirrups. Now, if you have ever ridden a horse after half hour your inner thigh is feeling pretty used whether your legs are relaxed or not. My sister did this stuff for at last an hour 2 or 3 times a week. the jumping must have been aweful lol, i'm just glad it wasn't me. she did want to quit, she thought about it, but her kids, family, husband, everyone she knew kept reminding her of her goal. If you haven't riden a horse I encourage you to ride one when you can (with, and without, using stirrups) to get the full gist of what i described with the horse thing.