Need Help!

[dadysmony]

I need some advise fast how do I explain to my boys that great grandpa died tonight? He's been sick for a few months now and the boys understand that he wasn't feeling well. My kids are 6,5,5 with autism, and an 19 month old. Should we take them to the funeral or do I ask my parents to watch them? Please vote popular so I have a clue on what to do thanks Summer

[aidanmom]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 12:43 AM

hey summer i am really sorry for yor loss. Aidan has had 2 of his relatives pass that he never knew within the past 3 years. we took him to the viewings but not the funerals but then again he was younger than Aiden for the both so i doubt he remembers them. we the boys close to him? i know at my aunts funeral a few of my younger cousins were there and knew what had happened and that she was sick. you might just tell them he was really sick and god just decided to take him up to be with him so he wouldn't be sick anymore.

[Kellyjude1]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 7:50 AM

My grandmother passed away in September.  I did take my 3 year old to the viewing, church and the buriel.  He was close to her,  this was his great-grandmother.  I explained to him that grandma is going to Heaven with Jesus.  Sometimes he looks up in the sky and says I know great mom-mom is up there.  We also have sent balloons off telling him they are for great mom-mom up in Heaven.  We do this on special occasions in remembrance of her.  I am so sorry for your loss, and I hope you can decide what you feel is best for your children.  Death is hard but I think just being open and honest is always best. 

[duckigrrl]

Mar. 29, 2009 at 12:03 AM

Bless your heart.  It's so hard to know how any child would handle a funeral, much less one with autism. If you think the older ones will be able to handle it, I think it would be okay to take them to the funeral. Then be prepatred to answer questions if the autistic one(s) are verbal.  Just explain as simply as possible based on your faith if you are religious, your feelings if you arent.