Teasing

[Rebeccalynn_dj]

Hubby and I were talking about teasing.  We were trying to figure out at what point does teasing turn to making fun? Is it a one liner?  Does it go on and on?   If the other person is upset is it teasing?

 I would love lots of input.  I think it is interesting to know how everyone views the subject.

[dle4125]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 11:19 AM

I think the difference is when the other person's feeling are getting hurt.  Teasing should be fun for all.

[clairandamjones]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 11:34 AM

I agree with dle4125.  If the other person's feelings are hurt, even if it wasn't intended that way or if they are just being extra sensitive, it should stop.  That's just basic respect.

[aurorabunny]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 11:35 AM

Do you mean as far as kids or as far as adults?  Because it's different IMO..

I think teasing someone you know is great because you know what you should or shouldn't tease them about.  DH and I tease each other all the time and we have a blast with it but we know what is off limits.  I will laugh my butt off with him at the fact that I can't cook but if he ever said anything about the way I look, weight, that kind of thing I would probably be hurt.

[SpiritedTigress]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 11:59 AM

It depends on the relationship between the Teaser and the Teasee. Are they dating, married, etc? Or is it two little girls or boys that are friends? Or is it a teacher and a student?

If the two people are married then as long as they didnt mean to hurt the other persons feelings then i consider it to be teasing. Now if their going all out and trying to get a laugh out of other people (not caring if their hurting their SO in the process) then thats making fun.

<3

[beanielips]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 12:34 PM

Teasing... oh.... what a subject.

My short answer that  give to my own kids and to my students is when teasing is done to hurt, it is wrong and needs to stop.  I also tell them that if the teasing upset someone they should apologize and move on.

Now, when my boyfriend and I tease eachother it is normally done out of love and in a way to remind someone they are out of line or need to step it up.  For example, I forget things all the time.  When he starts to tease me about being an airhead, I know it is time for me to start writing on post-it notes again.

I can take teasing from someone if I alrady know where I stand with them.

[MemaSu]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 1:32 PM

I think the Intent is very important. One can say 'Just teasing-' but if the intent was to hurt and the person is hurt that is not teasing in any way. If one makes a remark in fun, it should be very clear as the remark is made that it is in fun, not as an after remark explanation.

It's like being tickled- to me that is Not Funny at all- but a person doing the tickling can think it is halarious. Veruy subjective subject I guess.

[MemaSu]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 1:33 PM

Sorry for typo's!

[RanaAurora]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 1:34 PM

Well, I find it interesting that you put teasing as the fun part, and making fun as the bad/offensive part.  I consider them the same thing.  I don't think either are inherently offensive.  They're essentially synonymous to me.

However, I think your point is when is it not friendly anymore?  That's always going to vary on the people involved.  The goal is never to hurt anyone's feelings.  In my family, I always told my friends, "If my parents make fun of you, it means they like you."  As you can tell, that kind of fun is had with online friends too.  I mean, Angie's a ho and we know it. ;)

But yeah... teasing is intended to be good humored, and generally shouldn't be done if you don't know someone, as they could take it poorly or not understand that you're kidding.

[Gaia_Rain]

Mar. 28, 2009 at 5:29 PM

Without reading the other responses, I say that it depends on the intent.  Teasing to me is all in good fun - the teasee is laughing as well, and the intent is not to hurt someone's feelings.  It goes too far when someone's feelings are hurt intentionally. It also depends on the person.  I have one sister who is exactly like me and laughs at herself all the time.  I have another psycho crazy sister who has always been uber-sensitive and you could never, EVER tease her.  (the psycho crazy part is independent from the uber-sensitive part).