Ok, I know this sounds like no big deal but my husband and I are super irritated this morning.  My daughter (has autism) who will be 5 this month is absolutely obsessed with this doll.  She carries it around being a good little mommy, hugging it, feeding it, wrapping it up.  She has to have it with her at all times!  If we forget the doll, God forbid, then she asks for it constantly until she has her doll again.  It goes to the bathroom with her, to bed with her to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with her and of course to school with her.  This was not a problem last year or this year.  The doll goes into it's "bed" (backpack) when she gets on the bus.  Well, we got a note yesterday from her teacher saying that the doll was no longer welcome to school anymore.  Apparently, my daughter is no longer satisfied with leaving the doll in her backpack and disrupts class asking for the doll and going to her backpack "checking" on the doll.   Her teacher said that Gillian is "constantly disrupting class" in regards to the doll.  

So my husband and I feel that, yes we know she shouldn't bring a doll to school.  If she were a typical kid, this would not be an option but Gillian is not typical.  She has been having so much trouble with her behavior, controlling herself that she has been in trouble at home and school a lot.  We just want her to be happy.  And NO we aren't afraid of making her unhappy but when she doesn't have that doll she is a constant broken record.  CONSTANTLY asking about the doll.  If you could just see her little face, so pitiful!  So my husband hid the doll this morning before Gillian woke up.  He just called me saying that Gillian has asked for the doll literally 200 times!  Gillian catches the bus in 15 minutes.  I just feel like, who cares let her bring her doll to school!  It's just a freakin doll!  She has so much trouble with everything else.  This doll is her safe place!  I'm a teacher too so I know about kids disrupting your class but please.  Gillian is not going to school with her doll today.  I think that it will be a day filled with her asking for her doll.  I hope not.  

So my question is...IF Gillian is miserable without her doll, should I say something to her teacher?  Am I being rediculous? I'm sorry, I'm just irritated and needed to tell someone who understands.  I know ya'll do.

OK, well my husband just called and said Gillian asked for her doll 23 times in 60 seconds and when she went to get her spare doll and my husband took it away.  Gillian threw a fit and starting riping her hair out.  He said and I quote, "Tell Mrs. A to call me.  The F'in doll is going to school!"  So there you have it!

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Comments:

asTra...
Apr. 1, 2009 at 9:33 AM

I'm sorry. That must be hard.

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luvmy...
Apr. 1, 2009 at 10:19 AM

I would go and have a meeting with the teacher...

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brade...
Apr. 1, 2009 at 10:53 AM

I agree with Shawna, I think you both need to meet with her teacher and trying a "weaning" process of the doll. Taking away something cold turkey from anyone would be hard, let alone a child. I will say a special prayer for you three today, God Bless~

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natha...
Apr. 1, 2009 at 11:50 AM

If the teacher thinks having the doll there is a disruption, I wonder if she has considered the "disruption" she will encounter when your daughter is distraught and has to ask for it a thousand times.  I'm so sorry.  I have a son with autism and I understand the significance of this doll for your daughter.  I would be really upset if I was in your shoes, too.  Maybe she doesn't fully grasp why your dd has to have this item.  Can you schedule a meeting or arrange a way to talk to her?

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bupkie
Apr. 1, 2009 at 4:49 PM

Oh, my goodness,  I am almost in tears,  because I can relate,  that just isn't right nor fair.   The teacher has to be more understanding.   One HUGE element of the autistic spectrum can be an obesession with a particular item.... and it can be damaging to take that away from the child.   It is their sense of security, it is something they relate to and with, and is part of her "world".   You cannot take part of "her world" away from her like that!!!  I want to CRY!  It is more than a toy to her...  Everything I have ever read on autism and object obsession is to LET THE CHILD'S INTEREST in it ALONE, unless it is an inappropriate object or causes harm or danger...  A doll does no such thing.     But a system or rule for the doll at school could be worked out.  The teacher must understand,  she needs to be better educated... ;)   Yeah, I'd be upset!

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