Angry Rant: Soul Leeches (aka Military “wives”)

[Mantidae]

6 Apr 09

DISCLAIMER:  The reason I am posting this here and not on my public blog is because I can think of at least 4 people who might think this post is about or directly related to them.  If you think that, YOU’RE WRONG.  This is inspired by two individuals I’ve encountered over the last couple weeks with whom I had never had any previous contact.  Anyone who suspects this might be about them, whether I know you or not, or anyone who thinks this might pertain to their life, should please not read any further.

Also:  This is an angry rant.  I’m venting.  We all do it from time to time.  This isn’t a direct attack on anyone, though it is an attack on a group of individuals I am growing to despise more and more every day.  If you think you might be offended by my anger, please don’t read it.  If you choose to read it anyway and are upset, feel free to keep it to yourself or post your own angry rant on your own page.

Soul Sucking Leeches.  
      Over the past couple weeks I have had a lot more contact with a certain category of military spouse that, while I had only had contact with 6 times or so over a span of about 8 years, I already had a distaste for.  That distaste has been more than confirmed in the last couple weeks.  Certain events today have pushed me into a state of utter disgust and outrage at these “leeches.”

        These are women (for the most part) who think that the idea of being married to a Marine, or just the idea of getting married, is so exciting and enchanting that they give no thought whatsoever to their actual actions, jump right in, and then begin sucking the life and soul out of their young victims.  They screw with their heads, they screw with their emotions, they screw up their finances, and they just generally screw them (and in most cases many of their friends).

       Our young Marines are particularly susceptible to the siren call of a happy home life for a number of reasons I won’t detail here.  It will suffice to say there are a lot of young servicemembers with a deep seated desire to have someone care for them, a craving for family.  The women who prey on them often think they want the same things.  They get their pretty white weddings to their clean cut Marines, and they set up their happy little homes – perfect for showing up all the other vapid [girls] they went to high school with.  Then, in no time at all, something snaps.  These leeches start demanding time/actions/things they knew full well a Marine would not be able to provide, or having ridiculous expectations of what the military “owes” them as spouses, or they realize that they weren’t ready to stop partying/drinking/whatever.  Or they just start screwing anything that walks.

       That’s one that really gets me.  Half of these leeches are just total sluts.  I am far from one to judge a person’s personal behaviour.  As long as you’re careful and not hurting anyone, do what or whom you want.  EXCEPT if you’re married.  That’s pretty much one of the main rules of marriage: no screwing other people.  It’s just sick and twisted to make those vows, to make that kind of commitment, to make those promises to someone – to a person you swear you’ll love for the rest of your life; the person you claim is the ONLY person for you; to let that person who you say you care about place their full faith and trust in you; then to not have the willpower to keep from screwing his friends.  First off, you obviously have no effing clue what love is, nor what trust or commitment are for that matter.  And second, you don’t deserve to.

       And they all have excuses for the way they treat their spouses, regardless of which version of mistreatment they’re meting out.  I have encountered these two excuses over and over again:

1)  I was young and stupid.
- Yes, you are effing stupid (not to mention outright mean and uncaring).  I was young and stupid once, too.  I’ve made a lot of mistakes.  I almost married someone who turned out to be a lazy, drunken, violent ass.  But I didn’t just dive right into marriage.  I took that decision and its repercussions seriously.  We got engaged and gave it some time to make sure we were doing the right thing.  I think the Universe that I waited on an almost daily basis.  People screw up when they’re young.  Young people are often quite stupid.  I’ve been there.  I was really stupid.  I can sympathize.  What I WILL NOT sympathize with is using that as an excuse to hurt someone – esp. someone you claim to love.  That’s not stupid, it’s cruel and sick.

2.)  I am depressed/manic-depressive/some other “popular” mental disorder.
- Have you ever been actually diagnosed – by an actual psychiatrist (not your friend who’s in college for psych or who is depressed themselves or by WebMD)?  If you were then why aren’t you getting regular counseling and taking your meds?  I have some very close loved ones who actually suffer from these disorders, and they have them well in control.  They do not hurt those around them then use this crap as an excuse.  Everyone had mood swings.  Everyone gets unhappy, even depressed.  Not everyone uses it as an excuse to indulge their every selfish whim and be cruel and uncaring to those around them.  What most of these leeches actually suffer from is what I like to call “Center of Attention Syndrome.”  They care only about themselves when it comes to their actions, but they also so desperately want others to pay attention to them and usually to pity them, that they’re constantly spouting off about how bad their lives are, how they have all these problems, and how none of it is their fault.  I find you can identify these people by the fact that they never ask, nor to they care, how any of the people whose attention they so desperately seek feel.  Some advice for the sufferers of “Center of Attention Syndrome” of the world:  Life sucks for everyone.  Everyone has trials.  Some of the things I’ve come through would blow you out of the friggin water.  But I love, protect, and stand by those who count on me instead of feeding off them like a useless parasite.

I really wish there was a way to get the message out to our young servicemembers that these leeches are everywhere, and that they often come in very pretty packages that say all the right things and seem so loving and caring until their one big special day is over and they’re asked to behave like mature loving adults.  I wish there was a way to tell them that a real, loving marriage is worth the wait – a way to express how easy it is to fall into the trap the leeches set.  But, alas, I can’t think of one.  And it will continue to break my heart every time I see one of these caring, stand-up individuals torn apart by uncaring, self absorbed leeches.

Whew!  That was quite a rant.  All done now.  Back to my lunch.