Sticks tounge out at world and says Bite Me!--THIS IS A POST OF ME B*****ING

[sophie_sue24]

I know its earth day.  I care really I do.   In fact we are taking the kids to see that movie this weekend.   You know the one with the polar bears and stuff....Earth day is not what this post is about. 

It's about my life being generally disagreeable right now. 

I mean I *know*  i am supposed to be thankful for everything that is right in my life.   I should be glad that things aren't any worse than they are.  I should be happy that my kids are healthy,  even when they are being complete and total brats.   I should be happy for everything that is RIGHT in my life,  and I AM. 

But...

Does that mean that i don't deserve a day to be generally pessimistic and to dwell on the crap that is pissing me off.   If i were having a period these days I would soo say that I am PMSing,  but since I haven't had one of those in a few months,  I'll blame my mood on the gloomy weather.  

1. I am going to New Orleans.   I am excited!  Really,  I am. I am going to see a band that I really love,  and spend a romantic weekend with the love of my life.   Why shouldn't I be happy about this.  I guess I am just pissed that in the 8 years I have been married  we have never been able to just run away for the weekend.   It's never been something financially smart.   Because,  i am a tight wad that cringes at the thought of spending money on something that isn't absolutely necessary.   Because i made the stipulation that if we go (after he had already purchased the concert tickets, to make sure i couldn't say "No, we can't afford it.")we have to get completely caught up on bills so that we don't get further behind in taking this trip.    We will get to that point and have money for the trip,  but it is gonna be cutting it close,  and then we still have to raise the money for his Vasectomy BEFORE HE LOSES HIS JOB AT THE END OF JUNE.

2. Preston's health.  His  acid reflux has been really really bad.  So bad that he joined a research study to try a new study drug.  Not only does he get to test out the new acid reducer,  but he also gets paid for it.   Not much,  but,  he gets compensated for his time.  Well in the physical they did an EKG.  This tests his heart.  Something came back abnormal,  so they did another one.  It was the same way.   They said that one could be a fluke,  but 2 may be something he needs to get checked out.  So I made him an appointment for the cardiologist.   They did an EKG at the cardiologist,  and it did the Same thing that the research centers EKG did.  So along with a stern lecture of: LOSE WIEGHT,  GET YOUR CHOLESTEROL AND YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE DOWN,  EXERCISE FOR AT LEAST 30 MINUTES A DAY...ECT  HE ALSO HAS TO HAVE A CHEMICAL STRESS TEST AND DIFFERENT KIND OF EKG, AND AN ULTRASOUND OF HIS HEART DONE NEXT MONDAY.  

We found all this out Monday.   Tuesday Preston had to have an EGD for the Reflux study.   This is where they put a camera down his esophagus and check everything out.   He had Grade C erosion of his esophagus.   Grade D is the worst you can have.  

Good news: They told us that everyone on the study drug has had their erosion heal during the course of the study. 

Bad News:  This will more than likely be a lifelong problem for him,  and even with medication he will have a bland boring,  and tasteless diet.   Who wants that?  

3. Andrew may not be ready to start Kindergarten next year.  They have already said they don't expect him to meet one of the goals that they set for him at the beginning of the year.   He is doing so much better with his speech,  and he is really getting along well with everyone in his class.  I am just so worried that if we start him next year he won't be able to catch up academically with the other students in his class and that he will get "left behind"   in the process.  He is such a sweetheart,  I couldn't bear it if some of the kids teased him for not knowing all of his colors or not being able to count to 10.   He gets teased all ready (at Sunday school no less)  for not being able to stay in the lines while coloring.   He still scribbles.....   This is breaking my heart for him.

4. Both of the boys have birthdays coming up.   Seeing that their birthdays are only 5 days apart we do joint birthday parties.   My dad who hasn't seen his grandsons since Christmas will be coming to the party,  ONLY to leave early to take his NEW GIRLFRIEND TO A CRAFT SHOW IN BIRMINGHAM.  Only he hasn't told me this yet.  He told my sister and my sister told me.   I did trick him into buying lunch for the party.   After my sis told me of his plans to leave the party early,  I was so mad that I called him and told him that I was changing the time of the party from 12-2 to 2-4.  Money is tight after all and doing a lunch time party i would would need to provide lunch.   He offered to buy pizza for the party.  Never telling me that the later time would conflict with his plans with his girlfriend.   Manipulative of me?   PROBABLY,  BUT AFTER A LIFETIME OF HAVING MY WANTS OR NEEDS PUT BEHIND WHO EVER HE IS MARRIED OR DATING AT THE TIME,  I DON'T REALLY GIVE A CRAP IF I MANIPULATE HIM INTO BUYING A COUPLE OF PIZZA'S,  I MAY EVEN SAY SOMETHING TO THE WOMAN I HAVEN'T EVEN MET,  BUT ALREADY DON'T LIKE.

6.JACKSON WILL BE 2-He already has a bad case of the terrible twos.  I had to call poison control for the first time this past week when he once again climbed and got hold of some Clorox clean up from beside the kitchen sink.   He sprayed it in his eyes.  He is fine.    ALL CLEANING PRODUCTS NOW HAVE A NEW HOME ON THE SHELF ABOVE THE WASHER AND DRYER....

JACK IS SO MISCHEVIOUS,  AND CAN BE DOWN RIGHT MEAN.   Other times,  he can be so sugary sweet that he gives you a toothache.   His bi polar tendencies have really been wearing on me lately.  Like right now,  he is mad that i put the gate up in the kitchen to keep him back here with me,  his retaliation is turning on the TV and turning it all the way up....

7.  I love my little house,  and I enjoy cleaning it.  but seriously,  how many times do I have to tell a grown man not to leave crap everywhere.   His work clothes are stored in the laundry room.   I have a tub that i keep them in to keep them away from the other lauding.   To accommodate him I have put a hook on the wall for his work hat,  and a jar on the top of the dryer for the contents of his pocket and for his work glasses to be placed in.  he undresses and just piles everything on top of the lid to the washer.   Which means if I am doing laundry that day i have to move everything to its place....it just really really really really really irks me.  Not only that,  but he takes the empty coke box out of the fridge,  instead of breaking it down,  and throwing it away or putting it in the garage,  he sets it on the kitchen table.  

he usually wears "house clothes" at the house so when we come home from somewhere he changes clothes.  He leaves the clothes that are still technically clean lying around the house and then gets mad if I wash them because he was planning on wearing them somewhere the next day.    UGH....why can't he just help me with the house,  by not leaving crap everywhere.   I wouldn't ask his help at all if he would just take initiative and keep his crap picked up....how hard is that to do?

8.The boys birthday party is a week from saturday.  I still havent cemented the plans or made the invites.   I guess i just don't want to do one at all,  but that is only cheating the kids out of a life experience.   I guess we will do a movie at the church and do pizza  cake and ice cream.  Maybe pin the tail on the donkey or something...blah....

Ok,  I'm gonna grab the bag of dove promises and go back to bed...I'll see you on the other side.

[ShutterbugMama]

Apr. 22, 2009 at 9:19 PM

Sorry life is generally for shit right now.

It'll get better, of course, yeah, yeah, but RIGHT NOW, Im sorry.

xo

[Seriously92]

Apr. 26, 2009 at 2:19 AM

Well, the good news is that the sun will rise in the morning.

The bad news is - it might still be raining. 

Just keep breathing Bridgette.  It will be ok.

ANd KUDOS on the dad-trickery!  I would SO do that.  Luckily, I am not forced to deal with my dad's galpals since he lives 1300 miles away...but even still - it's all yuck.

I will be praying for Preston's health...it's a real blessing that you're finding this stuff now with a teeny bit of time to do something before he loses his benefits.  Hopefully that new drug really will help his throat.  And hopefully it won't turn his fingernails orange or some crazy thing.  :-)