Ran into an old friend

[SalemWitchChild]

 Today all of us decided to go to Walmart for a few things, so were walking down an isle and I hear someone yelling my name. I turn around and its an old H.S. buddy. We were actually pretty close in HS but lost touch after awhile. She was with I assume is her new husband. I know she was divorced and had two sons, but she has another son that is only 5 weeks old. He's so cute!

She started talking about our reunion that will be this year. Actually, she won't get to go because she dropped out just before graduation, but I didn't want to bring up that fact. And she started talking about another friend of ours. She is having her 10th child any day now! I can't imagine having that many. And of course the dreaded question comes up, "When are you having another?"

OK first of all, I really really hate that question. I mean, it assumes that I want another. Which actually happens to be a yes, and then when I say, I don't think we can have more, I get the pity party. "Oh it'll happen just wait." Hello!!!!! Waiting 7 yrs and not happened yet. I don't think it will.

OK I wasn't waiting all of that 7 yrs. I was on BC for 4 of those. But still 3 yrs is plenty of time doncha think?!

I don't need pity, and I don't want assumptions. I'm blessed to have one child. Of course, another would be wonderful. But I'm tired of every month wondering if this month will be the one.. I cannot stop hoping, and each month I'm disappointed. All I want to do is forget that its a possibility and one day be happily surprised.