I've Been Deleted, Have You?

[WindyTheWidow]

I recently left a comment on another CM's post in which she complained that her husband doesn't understand her because he wants to buy her a gift for her birthday and Mother's day and she just wants to spend time with him and the kids. While I understand her wishes, and completely agree that time with loved ones is more important than anything that can be purchased I also think that if your husband cares enough about you to not only remember your two most significant days of the year but wants to buy you a gift to celebrate you should take it with a smile on your face. Now the gift should NOT be a substitution for spending time together, but it is a nice compliment. My opinion is that any gift given with thought behind it should be graciously accepted even if it's a pair of yellow latex dishwashing gloves. I thought I expressed myself gently and unoffensively, but clearly I'm wrong because my comment has BEEN DELETED. I didn't even get a snarky retort, just "click" you're gone. My birthday is on Saturday and my first Mother's day is next Sunday. My husband isn't here to help me celebrate either of those days. There is no one to go out and buy me a card from our son, no silly gifts, no special dinner......why? Because he DIED! Not to be insensitive but quit complaining when your husband wants to give you a gift for crying out loud! What is so horribly wrong with a man wanting to show his love and appreciation to his wife with a gift? Sure, I don't know all the potential circumstances as this CM didn't go into any other detail, so maybe there is some sort of crazy but valid reason as to why he shouldn't buy her a gift, but I ask you this........IF HE DIED THE DAY AFTER MOTHER'S DAY WOULDN'T YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT HIS LAST GIFT TO YOU WOULD'VE BEEN? I can guarantee that whatever it was you would treasure it as if it were the most precious substance on God's green earth.

[pnwmom]

Apr. 30, 2009 at 10:01 PM

Thats too bad that your post was deleted.  I think that was valuable iformation that we all need to hear.  The origianl poster should have responded with a "why" or something so you could give her your point of view.  I am sorry for your loss.  I voted this popular. 

[pnwmom]

Apr. 30, 2009 at 10:02 PM

information..not iformation.  Why didn't I use spell check?    LOL

[Mommy2aQT]

May. 1, 2009 at 7:47 AM

Apparently she didn't appreciate your "gift" either.  Don't dwell on it.. people are odd.

[Sandy601]

May. 1, 2009 at 10:43 AM

Oh wow, a gift is always a great reminder of how much we are loved becasue it means that someone cared enough to put thought into it and take the time to get something. I know that with our daughter Samantha, she has a three year old and she is our pride and joy. Samantha and the father of Kiara do not have a relationship anymore and haven't for quite some time, he has moved on. He still sees our granddaguhter Kiara but it isn't his place to get mommy a birhtday card or Mother's Day gift, I take Kiara out and do it for her. I must say Kiara loves it. We do all Holidays and get something for her mommy and Kiara is always so proud to give a gift to her mommy and I must say the first time we did this Samantha cried because she was so touched by it. Even though the kids dad was alive and there for my kids I NEVER and I say NEVER in sixteen years EVER got a gift or card from him. EVER!?!?!?!

[armycoppertop]

Jun. 12, 2009 at 12:06 AM

My husband has never bought me a gift on his own (only with his ex-wife before they split) because he has never had the money, but he has always wanted to get me a gift. But I have always controled out budget and food has always managed to eat up our funds before he could get anything (although somehow I always manage to get something stashed so I can get him a small gift and card, I don't know why I can't get money stashed to give to him!!!). I do long for a small "materialistic" gift from him, sort of something I can flaunt around to my friends who are just completely jealous of my husband, but I relish the fact that on my birthday he made sure the kids wished me a happy birthday before school, he helped my kids make my mother's day breakfast in bed (and they are his STEP children!), if we had the gas he would make my ex take the kids and drive me to the beach for a night time stroll in the sand and will try to get me to dress up in sexy clothes so he can take me out and show me off because he thinks I am the most beautiful person in the world.