Maybe I am making a big deal out of nothing, but I am so upset right now. My husband's step mom and I are very close or so I thought. I called her today and she told me she was going to my BIL's house to watch their daughter. My BIL is an ASS, and that is being nice... and his' wife is worse. I tried my hardest to be nice with them for the sake of the family.. But after all the crap they have pulled I just can't anymore.. So I just see them when I have to and keep it civil. Anyway I called to ask her if she wanted to come over next Sunday for Mother's day. Like I said before we are very close I have been together with my husband for almost 19 years and we always got along. We go away together, she is so good to me and my children who Love her more than anything.She tells me she is going to my BIL's house and maybe she will stop by. I felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I call her everyday, she lives about 45 minutes away from me I bring the kids up to see her as much as I can. The only time my bil and sil call them is if they need a babysitter or they need something. They never go see her or my fil. Now I know if she said yes to my bil first she couldn't turn around and change her plans b/c of me. But my BIL lives 5 minutes away from me..So she could of split the day or am I making too much of this? I know I'm rambling but I just don't understand. To show you what type of person my BIL and SIL are my husbands real mother passed away last Dec. My brother in law 's daughter never even saw her grandmother b/c my bil stopped talking to his mother ( who lived in a nursing home) b/c of a parking space. She never even saw a picture of her. I gave her some I had, but my bil never knew and didn't even care. My sil still had a party for the baby the day after she died. I'm not making this up.

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May. 3, 2009 at 8:24 PM

Well, I'm thinking because your MIL is so close to you,,,she feels very comfortable with you. She probably doesnt feel as comfortable with your BIL/SIL because they dont see her as  much,,etc.  So, when they invited her to their house on mother's day,,, she probably feels obligated to go.  Does that make sense.   BUT,,, I will say, she should also know ALL OF HER KIDS are going to want to see her.  BIL/SIL 'should' know this.    That's why Mother's Day and Father's Day is like a holiday with my family.   We make plans at least a month ahead of time regarding who's hosting it and what we're bringing to help with the meal.. 

We kind of have a similiar situation with Tim's family.  Tim's mom passed away 25 years ago. Tim's dad is remarried to Judy.  Judy's daughter ( who I get along with very well - she's one year older than me) will make plans to see Judy and Tim's Dad weeks ahead of time for lets say,,,Tim's dad's bday.  Well, Tim and his sister dont plan ahead and they call  his Dad a few days ahead of time and he will tell them he already has plans with Judy's daughter.  Now, I understand its not right that Tim and his sister wait until the last minute,,,,but I think it should also be common knowledge that Tim and his sister are going to want to see their Dad on his bday.......... so when Judy's daughter makes plans weeks ahead of time,,, everyone should expect Tim and his sister to be showing up that day, also.  KWIM ?

So, I think your MIL, BIL and SIL should have known you and Larry are going to want to see MIL on Mother's day, too.  SIL and BIL should have made plans for EVERYONE to come to their house to celebrate Mother's Day. Since they didnt do that, MIL should have made it clear she still  needs to find out what you and Larry have planned that day and will need to split the day. ....

Does that make sense ? LOL

I would not be upset at MIL,,,instead,, call her up and ask if she'd like to come to your house after SIL/BIL for some yummy homemade dessert--- something like that.

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