Finding a Home

[LiliM]

I have been rootless in my faith for a looooong time.  Like, over 20 years.  In that time, I spent some time going to Mass. I loved it, especially when it was done in Latin.  It was wonderful.  I also dated a Jewish guy, and I used to go to Temple with him.  It was beautiful.  So much so that I considered converting.  But, as with all the other churches I have visited, I do not agree with some of the major tenets of the faith.

The lady I used to go to Mass with told me that she knew I was searching, and that while she could appreciate that, she thought I should never join a church that I could not believe in wholeheartedly.  She knew why I was searching - I left my church as a teenager because I began to see what it was that it was teaching, and what I, as a woman, was expected to do.  To be second is unacceptable to me merely because I was born with an innie versus an outie. 

So, 20 years of visiting churches, and liking a lot of what I saw, but not being able to stomach or live by some of the core values.  Now, I have kids.  I feel that one of the things I ought to do as a parent is to give my kids a spiritual base, and then let them do whatever they want when they are older.  I didn't get that from my parents - my mom tells me she regrets that - so I found my own church and my mom was totally ok with hauling me around to the various church things.

I finally, on a whim, took the What Religion Are You? quiz on Beliefomatic.com.  Several times.  Every time I was 100% Universalist Unitartian.  Followed by Neo Pagan and New Age.  DH, who is a silently protesting Methodist  was forced into the quiz also.  He also turned up as a Universalist Unitarian.  Followed by two sects of Buddhism.  I was totally surprised at that.  So, with a little badgering, I got him to go to church with me one Sunday.  He grudgingly admitted he not only liked it, he would go again.

So I have been going ever since.  Every time I go, I am reaffirmed in my belief that I have found a home.  I feel spiritually re-energized after service.  Probably because there is no mention of god, since who knows what, or who, god really is, and the UU church embraces not only some of the Judeo-Christian beliefs, but those of the native tribes, who believe in an all encompassing spiritualism, and in the stewardship of the earth.  UU's believe in compassion for others, justice for everyone, caring for the people and the place around you, in helping others.

The church I have been going to has as its local charities Trout Unlimited, who clean up rivers and streams all summer (the kids can't wait to do that) a homeless shelter for women and children that gives them somewhere to stay during the day, and people who are in AA.  I love all that. 

The sermon this week was on Freedom.  There are tons of musical types in the congregation, so in between speakers of various social cause people sang songs of protest.  It was inspirational.  It has been so long since I could honestly say that I was inspired by anything from a pulpit, but this past week took the cake.

It feels good.  My mom, when I told her I was doing this, and told her that I had missed church, told me that even in elementary school, I was very communal and enjoyed all the aspects of the church I attended, and that while she did not agree with a number of the tenets of this church, she liked a lot of the positive things she saw from me, so allowed it. 

I think that is what I have missed the most.  The sense of community, of people working together for a greater good.  And this congregation is very active.  Even the kids like church school.  Right now, they are planting flowers, and learning about caring for the earth around you.  They ask to go.  That makes me feel like I am not only doing something good for me and my soul, but for my kids as well. 

So I think I have found a home.  And it feels really good.

[AprilT]

May. 5, 2009 at 12:56 AM

I am totally baffled why you felt you were second class as a Catholic woman.  I've been Catholic all my life and do not feel that way at all.  Just FYI, I'd be among the first to notice and complain if I was second class.  I'd be happy to talk if you want to pm me.

[LiliM]

May. 5, 2009 at 3:33 AM

April, thank you for the comment - the church I left was not the Catholic church.  I had a great neighbor who would take me to Mass with her every Wed.  I was never a Catholic, merely a visitor. 

(Original Poster)

[Godsmackgrl]

May. 5, 2009 at 7:09 AM

I am really glad that you have found peace Lil.... Embrace it!

[FooFooMom]

May. 8, 2009 at 5:26 AM