WHY?

[mierjo]

This Saturday I went to my stepson's baseball game. His mom (my husbands ex) was there of course. We get along so no big deal. It was her birthday, which my husband forgot until she said something. So..."Happy Birthday!" Still no big deal until she said to my husband "Don't forget your Dad's birthday tomorrow"! I suddenly felt as big as an ant. I had not reminded him and if his ex wife hadn't said something we would have forgotten. Why do I let little things like this bother me. My head is saying "Of course she remembered, it's the day after her birthday and they were together for 10 years! No biggie" (We've been married less than a year) But my heart is saying "you're his wife, it's your job to remind him. He still NEEDS HER!"

My husband and his ex get along. He doesn't like her very much but he LOVES his son and is trying to make things easier for him. That is one of the reasons I love him so much! It's hard sometimes though! Sunday he was telling his son that Mommy is opening up the pool this weekend. Then he promised my son that we would go over there sometime so they could all swim. I don't want to!! I know it's good for the kids BUT...

WHY CAN'T I BE A BIGGER PERSON?? It's just that they were together longer & she likes to pull the "Remember when, or Guess who I saw". I know that they have a past but I don't want to talk about it or lilsten to them talk about it. I also know that my husband loves ME with all his heart. She's also married to the guy she cheated on my husband with so no worries there.

I feel like such a child when I'm around all of them! WHY??

Lord, help me to not feel this way!

[ShutterbugMama]

May. 18, 2009 at 9:06 AM

There's congruency for the kids, then there's..."OVER WITH".

Set boundaries....NOW.

 

[mierjo]

May. 18, 2009 at 9:33 AM So I'm not horrible??

(Original Poster)

[Mackenzie40]

May. 28, 2009 at 12:17 PM

your not horrible ! Its hard being the second wife ( harder then it is being the first imo) So your already the bigger person and honestly he should remember himself and should have told her that he's a big boy now  ..=) Maybe her "parenting" him is part of why he isn't with her anymore but IS with you.