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About Gunner...
- May 27, 2009 at 11:30 PM
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- Comments (3) Total Views (98) Everyone can see this journal post.
I was asked to write what we expect to happen when Gunner receives his Cochlear Implant. This is definitely a question we have asked ourselves time and time again.
I guess first I should tell you a little bit about our little man Gunner. He is the most active, caring, fun, loving, intelligent, kinetic, determined, and eager four year old I have ever met. He came into this world with an interesting outlook on life from the beginning…always looking at things in the world from an upside down point of view. He was a colicky infant that was also tongue tied; yet not diagnosed until 3 months of age. He never once gave up trying to eat; he just tried harder. He was always determined to do what he shouldn’t. It never mattered if it was grabbing for the sink water nozzle while bathing, at just a few months of age, or rolling over at 2 weeks old. Gunner didn’t pass the infant hearing test after birth. We went back a few weeks later where he barely passed. We were reassured by the doctor’s it was probably nothing more than fluid build up. As the days and weeks went by, Gunner learned to coo, and giggle, and seemed to turn to voices. I remember now holding a colic stricken infant that was inconsolable by the basic ideas to sooth him that worked for his sister. By that I am talking about walking the floor with static playing loudly in the back ground, the vacuum cleaner running constantly, loud music playing, or just holding him close and making the shhhh sound louder than he would cry. I never received any benefit from doing these things, yet I never gave up trying. By the time he was walking I noticed he wasn’t turning to loud noises or voices. I asked the doctors several times if he was deaf and always received a new excuse for Gunner not responding or trying to communicate. We always did what the doctor suggested to only get the same result. At nine months old Gunner received his first set of tubes due to constant ear infections. After we brought him home I remember his sister rattling a bag of chips and Gunner looking to see what that noise was and I was instantly amazed he had heard that. I was certain then that the tubes we the answer. A few months later, reality set in that Gunner could NOT hear us. Several people screamed his name as he was running out of the yard but nothing. Was it determination to see what was on the other side of the fence, or was it he just couldn’t hear us. More tests were ran and always came back with the same answers. He’s a boy, and boys learn at slower rates!
Gunner was diagnosed as being profoundly deaf in his right ear and severely deaf in his left when he was two years of age. I cried! I denied it! Finally I wasn’t going crazy, it was confirmed that my worst nightmare was indeed a reality. A few months later Gunner was fitted with his first set of hearing aids. The moment they turned them on I bawled my eyes out…my son was going to hear. Not even close! Not even a response that he was hearing anything at all. Day after day we put those hearing aids in his ears in hopes that we would get a response a sign that Gunner was hearing us or hearing something. And day after day we would fight Gunner to keep them in, and at day end we would take them out and sigh as no signs were noticed. For six months we did this. We had started to learn basic sign language and teach Gunner. He was then seen for a horrible ear infection by Dr. Syms that he had had all summer. During that time the ear he could hear some out of was so infected he couldn’t wear his aid. We had tried everything under the sun t get rid of the reoccurring infection and it too Dr. Syms to tell us the most simple thing to clear it up. Soon after the infection was finally gone, Gunner started school at the CHIC program and again wore his hearing aids daily, until he ate one on the ride home. By then we had started the process of getting him approved and cleared for Cochlear Implants. They made new ear molds while he was sedated for his MRI and CT scans. We then waited for his new hearing aids to be sent from CRS. The paperwork was lost on someone’s desk for awhile, and then once all of that was taken care of Gunner’s new hearing aids were mailed to the wrong address in the wrong city in Arizona…pushing the delay to almost 3 months. We all still worked hard to communicate with Gunner and learn all the new signs he was learning at his new school. It was paying off at a rapid rate and you could see the eagerness in Gunner’s eyes to not only sign to us but to talk to us verbally. Finally he received his new hearing aids and was totally amazed at what he could hear. His teacher noted when she turned them on his face lit up and he smiled…he heard something he had never heard before… he heard the microwave beep when it was going off…but it was the microwave in the next classroom. Gunner has grown so much this year physically, but he has grown even more intellectually. We have all learned so much from him. My mother always said, “As a mother you will teach a multitude of things to your children, but it will never equal what your children will teach you in life!” Thanks mom… I now know what that means!
It took me a long time to stop denying Gunner was deaf, but it took me even longer to realize the only difference between Gunner and other children is he is deaf. He can do anything they can except hear.
When I first heard of Cochlear Implants, I thought it would make Gunner hear like us and wanted that immensely for him as well as for me. I won’t lie and say I long to “hear” him say “I love you mommy.”
After many months of research, I now understand and know that cochlear implants do not restore hearing, they only restore auditory perception. I also know no deaf person ever asked to be deaf, and many do not want to be just that deaf. People get cochlear implants to better their one quality of life and a chance to interact with the hearing world as a hearing participant.
We are also aware that the earlier a child receives the implant the better they do with it. My question is, have any of these children shown the desire, the need, the want to hear and to talk, like Gunner does?
I know many deaf people live productive and fulfilling lives being deaf by using sign language, interpreters, and lip reading. My question is, have they ever lived in a hearing life with everyone in their family just that hearing?
I am also aware that some people who get the implants, later in life decide they do not like them and never turn them on again and slip into the def community. Has anyone ever wondered if that was them, and that was their decision, would they decide what was best for them at that time?
I am aware there are risks to getting the implants also. Including but not limited to the higher risk of bacterial meningitis, surgical risks, and the fact that implants are permanent and cannot be removed. I have often thought about what if Gunner doesn’t agree with our decision to have him implanted when he gets older. All I can say to that is, with the love and devotion we have for Gunner and show him, I can only hope he will understand and know we had his best interest in mind when we decided to have him implanted. We make decisions for our children all of the time, this is a huge decision to make, but it is that a decision of what we feel is best for Gunner.
Right now, Gunner’s hearing aid only amplifies sound, not enough to allow him to learn speech. The implant will help to send sound from the ear to the brain. We are aware it could take many months for Gunner’s brain to realize he is hearing a certain sound. We will be working with Gunner from a ground zero phase. As if he was an infant again learning what that sound is, what that thing, person, and place is and what sound it makes. We will also be working with speech therapists to help Gunner learn the proper ways of mouthing. We know the sounds he will hear are different from normal hearing sounds and are described to be robot like. We know and understand the implant will not make Gunner a not deaf person and we know it isn’t a miracle fix!
We are aware of all the expenses the implant has with it. Speech therapy, special schools, post-op appointments, post-implant appointments, and so on. It takes not just money, but time, patience, dedication, devotion, and love. The greatest gift of love we can give Gunner is to accept him, and we have for the little man he is. We encourage him to be the person he is, and we embrace him as a whole, deaf or not. We are learning to not only sign with Gunner but to communicate with him because we love him. Learning to sign and communicate with Gunner hasn’t been difficult, and we have found it to be useful in our daily lives not only with Gunner but also with other deaf people. Learning sign language has tremendously benefited us as well as Gunner. When none of us knew how to communicate with Gunner, it was a constant battle to do anything with him…temper tantrum after temper tantrum, uncontrollable fits, and inconsolable bouts of physical terrors from him, and then one day it clicked he needed to learn a voice and so did we. We were as determined as he was to be understood and to understand. We have made it this far and we will make it the rest of the way.
I hope you can see how determined he have been through all of this and have made it here. I also hope you can see that we are ready for the next step in the right direction for Gunner’s future in a hearing family and community. We have jumped through every hoop thrown at us and have never given up…giving up on this would be like giving up on Gunner and we are never going to do that!
All I ask is for you to look into Gunner’s eyes. This is a child with great potential and a willingness that is rare and unrelenting. He has never given up, he has never backed down, but we feel our little man needs tools. Just look into his eyes!
I guess first I should tell you a little bit about our little man Gunner. He is the most active, caring, fun, loving, intelligent, kinetic, determined, and eager four year old I have ever met. He came into this world with an interesting outlook on life from the beginning…always looking at things in the world from an upside down point of view. He was a colicky infant that was also tongue tied; yet not diagnosed until 3 months of age. He never once gave up trying to eat; he just tried harder. He was always determined to do what he shouldn’t. It never mattered if it was grabbing for the sink water nozzle while bathing, at just a few months of age, or rolling over at 2 weeks old. Gunner didn’t pass the infant hearing test after birth. We went back a few weeks later where he barely passed. We were reassured by the doctor’s it was probably nothing more than fluid build up. As the days and weeks went by, Gunner learned to coo, and giggle, and seemed to turn to voices. I remember now holding a colic stricken infant that was inconsolable by the basic ideas to sooth him that worked for his sister. By that I am talking about walking the floor with static playing loudly in the back ground, the vacuum cleaner running constantly, loud music playing, or just holding him close and making the shhhh sound louder than he would cry. I never received any benefit from doing these things, yet I never gave up trying. By the time he was walking I noticed he wasn’t turning to loud noises or voices. I asked the doctors several times if he was deaf and always received a new excuse for Gunner not responding or trying to communicate. We always did what the doctor suggested to only get the same result. At nine months old Gunner received his first set of tubes due to constant ear infections. After we brought him home I remember his sister rattling a bag of chips and Gunner looking to see what that noise was and I was instantly amazed he had heard that. I was certain then that the tubes we the answer. A few months later, reality set in that Gunner could NOT hear us. Several people screamed his name as he was running out of the yard but nothing. Was it determination to see what was on the other side of the fence, or was it he just couldn’t hear us. More tests were ran and always came back with the same answers. He’s a boy, and boys learn at slower rates!
Gunner was diagnosed as being profoundly deaf in his right ear and severely deaf in his left when he was two years of age. I cried! I denied it! Finally I wasn’t going crazy, it was confirmed that my worst nightmare was indeed a reality. A few months later Gunner was fitted with his first set of hearing aids. The moment they turned them on I bawled my eyes out…my son was going to hear. Not even close! Not even a response that he was hearing anything at all. Day after day we put those hearing aids in his ears in hopes that we would get a response a sign that Gunner was hearing us or hearing something. And day after day we would fight Gunner to keep them in, and at day end we would take them out and sigh as no signs were noticed. For six months we did this. We had started to learn basic sign language and teach Gunner. He was then seen for a horrible ear infection by Dr. Syms that he had had all summer. During that time the ear he could hear some out of was so infected he couldn’t wear his aid. We had tried everything under the sun t get rid of the reoccurring infection and it too Dr. Syms to tell us the most simple thing to clear it up. Soon after the infection was finally gone, Gunner started school at the CHIC program and again wore his hearing aids daily, until he ate one on the ride home. By then we had started the process of getting him approved and cleared for Cochlear Implants. They made new ear molds while he was sedated for his MRI and CT scans. We then waited for his new hearing aids to be sent from CRS. The paperwork was lost on someone’s desk for awhile, and then once all of that was taken care of Gunner’s new hearing aids were mailed to the wrong address in the wrong city in Arizona…pushing the delay to almost 3 months. We all still worked hard to communicate with Gunner and learn all the new signs he was learning at his new school. It was paying off at a rapid rate and you could see the eagerness in Gunner’s eyes to not only sign to us but to talk to us verbally. Finally he received his new hearing aids and was totally amazed at what he could hear. His teacher noted when she turned them on his face lit up and he smiled…he heard something he had never heard before… he heard the microwave beep when it was going off…but it was the microwave in the next classroom. Gunner has grown so much this year physically, but he has grown even more intellectually. We have all learned so much from him. My mother always said, “As a mother you will teach a multitude of things to your children, but it will never equal what your children will teach you in life!” Thanks mom… I now know what that means!
It took me a long time to stop denying Gunner was deaf, but it took me even longer to realize the only difference between Gunner and other children is he is deaf. He can do anything they can except hear.
When I first heard of Cochlear Implants, I thought it would make Gunner hear like us and wanted that immensely for him as well as for me. I won’t lie and say I long to “hear” him say “I love you mommy.”
After many months of research, I now understand and know that cochlear implants do not restore hearing, they only restore auditory perception. I also know no deaf person ever asked to be deaf, and many do not want to be just that deaf. People get cochlear implants to better their one quality of life and a chance to interact with the hearing world as a hearing participant.
We are also aware that the earlier a child receives the implant the better they do with it. My question is, have any of these children shown the desire, the need, the want to hear and to talk, like Gunner does?
I know many deaf people live productive and fulfilling lives being deaf by using sign language, interpreters, and lip reading. My question is, have they ever lived in a hearing life with everyone in their family just that hearing?
I am also aware that some people who get the implants, later in life decide they do not like them and never turn them on again and slip into the def community. Has anyone ever wondered if that was them, and that was their decision, would they decide what was best for them at that time?
I am aware there are risks to getting the implants also. Including but not limited to the higher risk of bacterial meningitis, surgical risks, and the fact that implants are permanent and cannot be removed. I have often thought about what if Gunner doesn’t agree with our decision to have him implanted when he gets older. All I can say to that is, with the love and devotion we have for Gunner and show him, I can only hope he will understand and know we had his best interest in mind when we decided to have him implanted. We make decisions for our children all of the time, this is a huge decision to make, but it is that a decision of what we feel is best for Gunner.
Right now, Gunner’s hearing aid only amplifies sound, not enough to allow him to learn speech. The implant will help to send sound from the ear to the brain. We are aware it could take many months for Gunner’s brain to realize he is hearing a certain sound. We will be working with Gunner from a ground zero phase. As if he was an infant again learning what that sound is, what that thing, person, and place is and what sound it makes. We will also be working with speech therapists to help Gunner learn the proper ways of mouthing. We know the sounds he will hear are different from normal hearing sounds and are described to be robot like. We know and understand the implant will not make Gunner a not deaf person and we know it isn’t a miracle fix!
We are aware of all the expenses the implant has with it. Speech therapy, special schools, post-op appointments, post-implant appointments, and so on. It takes not just money, but time, patience, dedication, devotion, and love. The greatest gift of love we can give Gunner is to accept him, and we have for the little man he is. We encourage him to be the person he is, and we embrace him as a whole, deaf or not. We are learning to not only sign with Gunner but to communicate with him because we love him. Learning to sign and communicate with Gunner hasn’t been difficult, and we have found it to be useful in our daily lives not only with Gunner but also with other deaf people. Learning sign language has tremendously benefited us as well as Gunner. When none of us knew how to communicate with Gunner, it was a constant battle to do anything with him…temper tantrum after temper tantrum, uncontrollable fits, and inconsolable bouts of physical terrors from him, and then one day it clicked he needed to learn a voice and so did we. We were as determined as he was to be understood and to understand. We have made it this far and we will make it the rest of the way.
I hope you can see how determined he have been through all of this and have made it here. I also hope you can see that we are ready for the next step in the right direction for Gunner’s future in a hearing family and community. We have jumped through every hoop thrown at us and have never given up…giving up on this would be like giving up on Gunner and we are never going to do that!
All I ask is for you to look into Gunner’s eyes. This is a child with great potential and a willingness that is rare and unrelenting. He has never given up, he has never backed down, but we feel our little man needs tools. Just look into his eyes!
Comments:
1-3 of 3 comments
1
May. 28, 2009 at 9:51 AM
Good luck with the Cochlear implant. It sounds like you have done your research and are ready to go. Having known a lot of deaf children and their parents, my only advice to you would be not to stop with the sign language. It is such a large part of the deaf community, that he will miss out on that if he doesn't know sign. He can also learn to lip read and vocalize, but keep the signing too.
Feb. 3, 2010 at 7:22 PM
I refused to have CI.. why? heard some few stories that they get alot of headaches, even death, if a child stand by a water and lighting strikes.. it will go tot he brain cuz of mental thing in it.. sooo.. its ur choice im on ur side for wholething but sometime theres a complication comes up.. and u cant get CI removed if a child dont want it cuz it connect to a nerve.. so.. thats what i know of but.. im competely profoundly deaf also.. i dont wear hearing aides.. i dont want to use it never liked it so.. if u want more questions.. Email me RoseSkullz80@yahoo.com.. HUGS!
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