MIL issues...I don't really know what to do....need some help here PLEASE

[toddlermominoma]

We don't have anything to do with my MIL or FIL unless it pertains to my stepson - she's obsessed with him and has convinced my husband's ex that she's a victim so, there are times that the ex has given my stepson to MIL and we have to get him from her! GRRRR

Ok, just read the whole thing before you reply because I know what I would tell someone but, due to my husband's very valid worries, I'm torn and am in desperate need of advice.

Ok, the house that we live in was suppose to be willed to my husband or so my MIL has always told him. When his grandfather died, that is who owned the house, my husband was living here and had been for years. Well my MIL was the executor of the estate. Also at that time though, my husband was going through a divorce and my MIL was afraid that husband's ex would try to take the house. So, she told DH that she would keep the house in her name until divorce was final. LMAO And he actually believed her!!

He's waited years for her to put the house in his name to no avail - well NO DUH! Sorry, a little sarcasm escapes now and again! lol

Well, she shows up to his work the other day and tells him that if I were to sign a piece of paper saying that in a divorce I wouldn't want the house, she'd finally sign it over to him. She'd even do it by the end of the week! OMG!!

Ok, there's more important parts to this in a minute so don't go off half cocked here --- you can bet I did though!

I NEVER wanted this house but, it still hurt like bejesus that that stupid cow was actually dumb enough to think that I'd want to fight to keep a house that is almost a hundred years old!! While I love it, it has charm and potential, has anyone lived in a one hundred year old house?? It's not all it's cracked up to be, requires a lot of maintenance sometimes!

Anyway, onto the important thing

I tell my DH that I would gladly do it in a heartbeat if..if I didn't have two children.

I'm worried that she'd find a way legally to have me out on my behind, if we were to go through a divorce and then try to take my children because I couldn't provide for them. My oldest is a special needs child! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a home that is comfortable for him or a place where if he rages out of control, the neighbors won't think I'm beating him with a frying pan?!?!?!

So, I tell him I won't sign it. He says he completely understands but, he's worried about something happening to him, like if he were to die. He knows she'd throw me and my kids out of here so fast my head would spin. He says that if she signs it over to him and something were to happen to him, the house would get left to me and I'd always have a place.

He says that if we were to go through a divorce - as a marriage with a special needs child involved, often does - that he'd never kick me out. That he knows being a SAHM mom now for five years, which means no current income of my own and having my oldest son and his issues, it would not be easy for me to find a place anyway. He said that the house would be in his name and there would nothing that she could do to stop him from doing all this.

I don't know though, I told him to contact a lawyer on Monday to ask what she could do if I signed a piece of paper stating that.

I want to tell her to shove it but, my husband does a very valid point.

What would you do?

[goatmom4]

May. 30, 2009 at 10:31 PM

if it switches to his name then he can legally will it to even one of the kids tyo protect it    I would get some legal advice she sounds nuts 

[JAZenge]

May. 30, 2009 at 10:40 PM

Your mother in law is a NUTBAR!!!!!!!!!

You should get  some legal advice.  Maybe if she signs the house over to him, he can just go to a lawyer and quit claim the house into both your names.  And once it's his, he can change his mind I would think and put you on the deed. 

[Lb128f]

May. 31, 2009 at 2:26 AM

Sign...once the house is in his name...it is HIS house and he can do whatever he wants with it. Geesh...everyone needs to stop "planning" on a divorce! :-)

[Sabrinas777]

Jun. 15, 2009 at 8:19 AM

Well first, the ex is playing games to make your life more miserable (giving to MIL that she has no relation to?) Imagine an ex being scornful...wow,  never heard of that one  before! (But I digress...)

Not a lawyer yet (one year left),  but  have  worked in law 15 years. Agree to  terms, and once house is in HIS name,  have him sell it to you for one dollar (get a contract). Plus, it sounds like he has homestead "squatter" rights. Definitely talk to attorney. Legal Aid can help if you don't have financial resrouces. Agree completely with Lb128f. You can have the original agreement with MIL thrown out anyway, as it's unbelievably obvious whatever stipulation was signed under  duress (so not admissable). Good luck.