alcoholics shouldn't be allowed to be in the wedding party

[amberwriteslove]

i was the matron of honor and DH was best man in a wedding for our best friends over this weekend. there was an alcoholic groomsman. here's the outcome.

FRIDAY: DH and i get to the hotel about 20 minutes early. bride&groom-to-be have to pick up a groomsman who has decided to wait til last minute (literally) to pack for the weekend, so they are late. DH and i sit in the hotel parking lot for over an hour waiting for them so we can check in. we get a call right after we check in that one of the bridesmaids was in a car accident on the way to the airport and missed her flight. she'll have to take the next one and will not be able to join us for the dinner that night. because of these events we miss the scheduled train to chicago and have to wait for the next one (which didn't come for another hour). finally get to chicago. bride-to-be forgot to bring directions to dave & buster's (restaurant we were going to). i was the only one who'd ever been to chicago, so i was designated leader. we were already late for dinner so i suggested we take a cab or bus. everyone declines. we walk the mile to dearborn street where i ask a lawyer where to go (i've never been to dave & buster's so i wasn't completely sure). he says it's quite a walk, but everyone else STILL declines to get a cab or bus. we walk 7 miles before i realize my stomach is rock hard and it's getting hard for me to breathe. the only person who stops with me is DH. we decide, screw everyone else, we're getting a cab. realize the restaurant was only 3 blocks from where we were. cab driver was nice enough to only charge us for half the bill. sweet guy. rest of the people get there. i tell them that we HAVE to leave by 11pm and we are taking a cab no questions asked. alcoholic groomsman had 5 beers. come 11 everyone starts complaining about having to go. i make them leave anyway (yes we got cabs this time). alcoholic groomsman was in my cab. he bitched because i wouldn't let him stop to get more alcohol. train was delayed getting to station. there was a cubs game so a bunch of drunks are on the train. dude slaps his gf. his gf gets off when dude isn't looking. dude yells at conductor because he won't go back to drop him off at the stop the gf got out at. dude decides to piss all over the inside of the train. conductor stops trains and calls cops to press charges. finally get back to hotel.

SATURDAY: rehersal is today. got up at 8:30am. woke everyone else up. listened to alcoholic groomsman call me names for not letting him stop to get alcohol when we were in the cab the night before. rehersal went by decently. went for lunch. everyone was told to NOT order alcohol with their meals 1. because it was only noon and 2. because the grooms mom was paying for the lunch. alcoholic groomsman throws a fit. leaves table and goes to the bar. consumes about 5 beers. we order for him. he comes back, says he isn't hungry, takes food to go. decides he's going back to the room halfway through lunch so he can drink more. get back to room and go swimming. listened to alcoholic groomsman bitch some more about not being able to order alcohol at lunch. played with the ring bearer (because i wanted to AND because his mom didn't want to have him). went back to hotel room. grooms sister (who isn't in the wedding.. because she says it's tacky and embarassing to pull her son down the aisle in a wagon because he isn't old enough to walk yet and he's the ring bearer) decides to come to our room. my room consists of: me, DH, groom, and alcoholic groomsman. alcoholic groomsman has had at least 20 beers by this time. he bought out all the acohol from the hotel desk. decides he wants to go buy more before it's too late. buys a case of 30 from liquor store. it's 3:30 am and we have to be up by 8 am to get ready for the wedding. groom, DH, and i lay down. drunken groomsman and grooms little sister get in bed at 4:30. i'm not asleep yet because they were drinking and loud. all of a sudden alcoholic groomsman and grooms little sister start having sex.. in the same room as DH and i and in the same bed as her brother!!!!! groom tells them to cut it out. they leave for 45 minutes. they come back when groom is asleep (but i'm still awake.. i can't sleep because they are loud and abnoxious). they have sex again.

SUNDAY: wedding is today. i gather my things and go to bride's room (i'm the matron of honor, DH was best man). i'm dubbed messenger since bride-to-be cannot be seen by groom. bride-to-be finds out about the sex the night before in our room. alcoholic groomsman is bitched at for doing that with the grooms younger sister AND in the same bed as the groom. message is passed to alcoholic groomsman to NOT smoke while in his tux, to smoke before he got into it. alcoholic groomsman defies rules and says 'fuck you' to bride-to-be and smokes in tux anyway. alcoholic groomsman has already consumed about 6 beers before noon. make-up artist is late to do bride-to-be's make-up. this makes the rest of us late for hair. which makes us late for pictures. finally get to pictures. did an awesome job of hiding bride-to-be from groom. alcoholic groomsman decides he doesn't need to usher people as is his job, but instead smokes about 5 cigarettes and goes to the bar. 5 minutes before go time, bride-to-be starts hyperventalating. i calm her down. wedding seemed LONG AS HELL. go to reception. after dinner, alcoholic groomsman wants to go to the open bar there. i relay message that the bridal party is not allowed to drink at the reception, as to not make idiots of ourselves and make bride and groom look like they have poor judgement. alcoholic groomsman freaks out and leaves reception to drink in the room. grooms little sister yells at her mom during reception because mom found out about the sex the night before. we get back to the room, where alcoholic groomsman is still drinking. he's already consumed about 20 beers so far. we cannot get into brides room because someone has change the name on it. they refuse to give us new keys. finally figure out who changed the name (it was grooms little sister). helped bride get into fancy lingerie and picked up my stuff. went back to my room to realize i've had 20 dollars stolen. go back to other room to tell bride, who is on the phone with her mom who has had 800 dollars stolen. we find out the only person who had access to the rooms where mine and bride's mom's wallets were was grooms little sister. bride is hysterical, as am i. grooms mom is in full blown tears that her daughter did this. everyone was alcoholic groomsman to leave. since he's already consumed 20 beers by this time i do not want him to have to drive an hour home. i convince everyone to let him stay, as long as i kept an eye on him. bride and groom did not get to be alone until like 2am. they didn't even get to have a good ngiht like they should, because bride was so hysterical about the whole weekend, but especially upset about mine and her mom's money being stolen.

MONDAY: little sister was searched but did not have the stolen money on her person. she's already taken it somewhere else. dh and i help bride and groom get packed for honeymoon. checkout at 10:30 am.

i've decided that the number 1 rule for all weddings should be to NOT have an alcoholic person be in the wedding party.

[MSugarKane]

Jun. 1, 2009 at 10:37 PM

I hate alcohol and anything to do with alcohol. There is no social drinking, people end up drunk and do stupid things, say stupid things and never is there a time that is totally enjoyable when alcohol is served or being drank.

[amberwriteslove]

Jun. 2, 2009 at 5:43 AM

a-freaking-men. i wish alcohol never existed

(Original Poster)

[mamaof21986]

Jun. 5, 2009 at 9:23 AM

thats horrible! i would have told him to leave before the wedding even started even if he was in the weddign party! im getting married in 8 days and i would smack somebody but mine is small just at a park in plano, il and a reception in somonauk so itss not fancy but still thats so wrong

[amberwriteslove]

Jun. 5, 2009 at 5:33 PM

we were going to tell him to leave before the wedding but there were already more bridesmaids then groomsman and the brides mother said it would look off

(Original Poster)

[motherofanaries]

Jun. 5, 2009 at 5:48 PM

Alcoholics are all selfish assholes!

That being said, there ARE people who can drink a drink for the drinks' sake, and not for the sake of getting drunk. 

I have been to plenty of get togethers where alcohol is being served and no one does or says anything stupid.

Everything in moderation.

[amberwriteslove]

Jun. 7, 2009 at 12:16 AM

i agree. but if you KNOW you do not know when to stop.. or just refuse to stop, you shouldn't be in a wedding party. it ruins everyone else's fun, especially for the bride and groom

(Original Poster)

[armycoppertop]

Jun. 9, 2009 at 10:52 AM

I got a real easy answer... when DH and I do our formal ceremony, we will be having a dry wedding. I have several alcholics in my family and don't want to deal with them or the ones that mean drunks or idiot drunks. NO ONE will be drinking ANYTHING, we will be having the ceremony on post, so it will be included in an information letter that consuming alchohol at the ceremony is ILLEGAL (military post, federal law), therefore, NONE will be consumed at this event. We will also be making sure that the reception will be held somewhere that does not have a serving area outside of the ballroom, or that they will refuse to serve my guests/party. If they leave to get it somewhere else, I will have a few soldiers as designated bouncers who will not allow the drinkers to return to the ceremony.