Now he could be cheating.... with a girl from my church

[KensysMama]

So I was on my way through a neighboring town on my way to a softball game. My husband was supposed to be riding with a big group of people on their motorcycles. As I drive through town he passes me going the other direction not in a group and with a girl on the back of his bike (funny he says he's not comfortable riding long distances with passengers). So I do a u-y and follow his back through town, into my town, and down some side streets. When he is getting ready to turn onto a back road he guns it, obviously trying to get away. So I eventually lose him on the road and then I get a phone call from him. He was just returning my call, and what? I was behind him? well he didnt know that. So I made him tell me where he was and I went to the house of one of the guys he hangs out with in the group of dumb ass motorcycle guys. So he proceeds to yell at me about how dare I follow him and he doesnt care at me and its done and its over and he has absolutely no feeling fo me anymore. So I leave and call his mom and step dad and they talk me down enough to get me home. Eventually he talked to his mom and got caught in a lie. He really did see me behind him (imagine that) and he tells me that he gunned it becuase he didnt want me to make a scene in front of his new friends.

So I get home because I dont want him to say that I abandoned him and he's not home. He is at his buddy's house watching the hockey game. He doesnt get home until around 11. When he does I tell him that he is stupid and doing 120 mph on the interstate on his motorcycle and popping wheelies and getting hammered then driving home will get him killed and he is only thinking of himself and not his daughter or other family members. Anyway we talk more and he tells me the only things he ever liked about me was my looks, and we only got engaged because he thought thats what you do after you date for 2 years and graduate high school.

He wanted me to move in with my mom for a few weeks so he could see if he really would miss me, but his mom and my mom said that this was not a good idea, because again he might try to use it against me. So everything sucks. We are still going to counseling but I dont know. I feel stupid becuase I dont want to be that woman that lets him cheat and stays around but I love him. He swears that he isnt cheating and that there is nothing going on. The little slut goes to my church and is getting money from the church members to go on a mission trip to Africa. I have since called my pastor to tell him that she doesnt deserve the money to go because she is far from godly. I have talked to just about every member of his family and all of them think he is a dumb ass who is ruining his life. He drove home from a party at 430 am in his company truck completely trashed. He is 20. He would have gotten a DUI, gotten nailed for not being legal, gotten arrested, He would have lost his job and not have been able to get a job with the sheriffs department ever.

Thank God for my baby and family and friends or else I would never get through this.

[simplysarah77]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 10:03 AM

wow, sounds like you might be better off without him. If he's not happy and doesn't want to be there, it will be a long life living that way. Why not find someone who really wants you and wants to be with you. When one door closes another door opens ya know what i mean? you deserve better

[VeronicaJane]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 10:05 AM

Sounds like you need a man who appreciates you. If I were in your shoes, I wouldn't even do counseling. I would just leave him.

[CheshireHope]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 10:19 AM

i can tell you where i live its a 50/50 state if i wer eto ever leave the house in anger or he tells me "move out for a couple of day" he could get the locks changed and i would have no rights because i "abandoned him and our home"

but from the sounds of it he really has no respect for you or you child.

you have to do what is right for you and that child.

stay strong

[MOM2GRACIE99]

Jun. 13, 2009 at 4:33 AM

I've been in your shoes and after 13 years he ends up divorcing me for an older woman. Sometimes you just have to think of yourself and child and end it. There are a lot of men out there that are looking for a good woman who they can treat like a princess. Sounds like this person in your life is not one of them. Sorry...but I speak from experience. Best of luck! And please feel free to email me if you need to talk. Mary