Annelise's two year check up

[Mammalia]

Today we took Annelise to her two year check up (never mind that her birthday was in April). We picked an all new (and lovely) naturopath. I absolutely adore her!

I've been anxiously awaiting this appointment because Annelise hasn't seen a doctor since her first year well baby check up, and I've been battling weird mom emotions about Annelise's size. In this day and age it seems the big baby is the healthy baby. Not saying that small babies are not healthy, but instead of getting "my! what a healthy bouncing baby!" I get "oh! she's soooo small!" All the time.  In my rational mind, I'm fine with her size. But, in my crazy mom / is my child healthy mind, I can't help but wonder if Annelise has something wrong with her size.

Supporting these crazy thoughts is the fact that I work in a group home, and when doing a little bit of research on these folks with developmental disabilities, I find growth an important part of their development. One man here has on his history stating: from 5 - 10 months it was reported that he didn't grow at all. As soon as I read that I panicked and tried not to obsess over whether Annelise has been growing steadily or if there was ever a period of non growth.

I can't really explain why I obsess over it, but I do.

However, most of the time I think to myself, "if she wasn't so smart, so active, so healthy, then I should worry about her." And sometimes I pride myself in having such a portable kid. I'm able to whisk her in and out of her car seat, carry her for long walks if she's tired or asleep, hold her for a long time when she wants to be picked up. etc. But still, every time another mom says, "oh! she's so light! I could hold her all day compared to my kid." I digress into crazy "what's wrong with my child" mind.

So, with all that, I was really, really anticipating a professional telling me that she's fine. Just to ease my mind. I was comforted, but also set into another mode of panic after today's visit.

We went through all the developmental milestones and found Annelise to be pretty advanced. Her doctor was also impressed with how little Annelise gets sick and how well she eats. So, with the seal of approval, her doctor told me she's really healthy and completely normal. Which I knew, but needed to be told so. We went over the "every child developes differently", and if she really were suffering from some kind of growth problem it would be apparent in other ways like being fatigued, or sickly, or not as smart as she is.

Just when I was starting to feel really good, she put Annelise on the scale. 18 lbs! That's how much she weighed a year ago!! Those group home notes started appearing in my mind once more, and I became more and more worried. Thankfully, her height and her head size is all normal, on the low side, but normal. 18 lbs has been repeating over and over again inside my head all day. 18 lbs? Really? She really didn't gain ANY weight??

I have to keep reminding myself that she's actually healthy, and she's taller, AND she's impressively smart. That's what I get for shacking up with a small guy, I guess.

[mommabiggs]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 10:57 PM

Don't worry... Its because your a mom... Moms worry. :-)

Do you ever find yourself exclaiming oh, my... Your babys so HUGE!!! when you meet someone whos baby is huge?lol It would probibly offend them. I guess as an adult you want people to say "your so tiny" ... but as a child being tiny is a bad thing?

Who knows... Maybe just maybe I will eventually get up the nerve to exclaim over the chubby babys about how rotund they are. Just to see the moms reaction... lol

 

[Victoriana]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 11:11 PM

I've had similar issues worrying about Oscar (I haven't taken him to well baby visits since he was 2 months..although he did do to the doctor a few times around 10 months due to weird earaches). He was growning super fast, he's tell for his age, but skinny, for a awhile he just weighed 20 lbs, it doesn't look like he's gotten much taller. He looks like he's gained weight, though, so now I feel a little better but I'm going to take him in for a check up before he starts daycare.

When I move to Portland I'll have to get the name of your naturopath :)

[Mammalia]

Jun. 3, 2009 at 11:18 PM

Sure thing!

Also, when you move to Portland, we should hang out!

(Original Poster)

[Victoriana]

Jun. 4, 2009 at 1:44 AM

Definitely!!

[Victoriana]

Jun. 4, 2009 at 1:45 AM

I just realized how many typos were in my first comment, it looks like I was drunk!

[FelipesMom]

Jun. 4, 2009 at 8:22 AM

Haha, I don't think I'm as drunk as Victoriana... we'll see. Did you specifically ask the doc if it was a concern that Annelise weighs the same now as she did at one year? That seems to be the biggest remaining concern that you have, so I would call her back and ask if you didn't already. I like all the other reassurances you got, but it seems that your Mom-mind (we all have one, and it isn't paranoid, it's Mommish, it's totally normal to worry so much in part of your brain when you have a little one), anyway it seems that your Mom-mind still found this one thing to worry about. So, articulate it, and get an answer, and then focus on the answer whenever you start to worry.

What age is it when kids' weight gain kind of plateaus? Felipe is 2 1/2 and I know he already hit that age, the doc said "Oh yeah they kind of plateau at this age." I want to say it was at his 2-year checkup!  So then a small period of time with little or no weight gain (say from 12 to 18 months or so) could look like a whole year with no weight gain, b/c maybe from 18 to 24 months it was normal for her to not gain anyway, kwim?

Another thing, does her height and head size match up to her weight? It doesn't have to, but if it does that would be another reassurance for you. Felipe has always been small but everything matches up so I have never worried too much about it.

Also, how big IS your guy? Honestly I think our obsession with these size charts is a little much. (Not to say that you are crazy for letting it bother you - you are not! You're just a mom! But I do think that stuff is less important, in general, than doctors make it out to be). I had a friend who adopted a baby from Guatemala and she kept freaking out b/c the baby was way off the charts too small. I was like HELLO!! Guatemala!!! Have you seen how little the grownups there are??? So if you and/or your man are small, and especially if Annelises' grandparents are small too, then that alone might explain the whole thing.

And if you ever do get this totally off your mind, rest assured that, as a mom, you'll find something else to worry about and keep you up at night!