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REAL mom endorsements.
- Jun 17, 2009 at 11:59 PM
- By
- Comments (68) Total Views (2073) Everyone can see this journal post.
Do you ever catch yourself chuckling at the "mom endorsements" on commercials or advertisements?
We get a channel called BabyTV that my son loves to watch. I'll admit I was snickering today while watching the "parentorsements" they were playing. The scenes were moms and dads cuddled up on a couch, grinning baby sandwiched in between, talking about the educational scenes on TV. And that's GREAT. We try to watch TV together as much as possible and talk about what's going on too. But on the same hand, can we get real for a second? "I'm so glad that we have this opportunity to learn together as a family!" Uh-huh.
Mine would sound a lot more along the lines of "Dear Noggin, my eternal thanks for making Yo Gabba Gabba. Not only does it allow me a precious 30 minutes of time to do laundry (we use cloth diapers so if not for DJ Lancerock my child might be crapping in a bucket) but it has ensured me that my child will be so warped by weird Japanese puppets who look like dildos that he may actually have something else to talk about in therapy as an adult besides my parenting mishaps."
"Dearest Nickelodeon, I really appreciate you releasing the entire library of Blues Clues onto DVD. It may have drained my bank account, but that time spent sitting on my fat ass on the computer was worth every penny. I'm on CafeMOM, talking about the KID, that counts as attention right?"
"To the sweet, love of my life, inventors of baby gates---keeping the kid safe my patootie. Baby jail rules. I'm proud to announce that my child has had absolutely zero opportunity to try and stick his fingers in the dogs butt since purchasing your product."
THESE are the kinds of things we should really all get to see on TV. Do you have any REAL mom endorsements?
Tags: real mom endorsements, hey nobody's perfect, i guess keeping my kids fingers out of a dog anus technically is a safety issue
Comments:
Dear Maker of Linkydoos,
I know you're a mom, I saw it once on Oprah or something. I know you invented them so your little one would stop tossing their toys out of their carseat and stroller. I would like to thank you for the added benefit of my kids being able to play together, without being on the same half of hte room. Now my 2 year old can play with my infant without the screams of pain that usually accompany such behavior. I simply attach toys to each end of a long chain and voila, instant happiness. Until my 2 year old realizes they also make a great tool for lassoing her sister, that's a whole other letter.
I totally argee on the baby gates, my life would be nothing to chasing my son down the hallway because none of the doors close tight enough and keeping him out of my food storage area.
I endorse Sesame Street because it give me a quick 45 minute snooze on the couch in the mornings. Without that I wouldn't make it to lunch time most days.
This is great
A mom who I can relate too! I am just mad they dont make TEEN GATES!
Dear Lazy Town:
Thank you for teaching my daughter to say Sportacus before she has even learned to correctly say her own name.
Dear Nabisco, my sincerest grattitude for the invention of the nilla wafer, for without it I would be forced to endure hapless whining from my child begging for candy and cookies at 10am. Thanks to the nilla wafer, not only does he not beg for cookies and candy but he now thinks the nilla wafer IS in fact a cookie.
LMAO!!
Thank you to the makers of all loud and obnoxious toys, without which my children would have to play with EACH OTHER, a scenario that gives me chills.
A big shout out to the Madison Ave advertising execs, whose hard work and dedication taught my (autistic) son to speak. Quiznos, Mmm Mmm, Toasty!
Dear Anime Producers,
Thank you SO MUCH for your endless stream of inane cartoons my son likes to watch in JAPANESE. They are great. Really , I love having to watch my sons Anime DVDS in advance of him watching them to make sure that they arent CARTOON PORN designed for desperate men who live in their mothers basements. Thank you for women who are half human , half cat, rat, puppy, fox, etc, Fucking Ingenious. Thank you for making animated tits so big even I am amazed that the women can stand up, let alone fight evil and use massive weapons. I really appreciate paying $59.95 for a DVD collection that I have to RETURN because it wasnt advertized on the box that THIS MATERIAL IS NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN OR AUTISTIC TEENAGE BOYS. Thank you Thank you oh Anime gods, I SWEAR , the perverts here in america thank you , but I surely do not. What the hell are you all doing over there that makes your sick , perverted brains come up with the shit you produce? GAH , I am off to watch Gundam for the 1 millionth time , thanks again , assholes.
Wow.... hehe I needed a good laugh....
I have to endorse DreamWorks... if it wasn't for Shrek 1,2 and the 3rd my now 6 1/2 yr. old would have never sat still for greater than 20 seconds. Now thanks to the genius behind them my 20 months old veges in front of Madagascar... allowing me to waste time taht I should be cleaning on the computer!
kudos to baby gates (especially one that are of greater adjust for older non squared doorways), if not for them Alex would have a sole diet of dog chow, and constant wet shoes from doing a "mexican hat dance" in the 5 qt. dog water bowl! Not to mention his tumbles down my full flight of stairs would be far more than they ahve been!
TO the man who decided to put Sat. Mornign Cartoons on DVD from the 70's and 60's.... although it distrubes me that what I grew up and thrived on is marketed as "for mature collectors only, not intended for children"..... I am sorry... I didn't know that a mass of teens in teh late 80's and 90's actually tried to blow up a roadrunner with explosives or an anvil from Acme??????
Anywho... thanks for the giggles, now I must update....
LOVE IT!!!!
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