what to do, about the 4 of July ?

[Cindylilies]

My husband has been invited to go to his dads home for the 4th of July. I do not want to go, my now sister in-law got pregnant by mistake while she was dating my brother in-law. She is 8 month pregnant, and didn't plan this pregnancy. She and my brother in-law aren't ready to be parents, but have no choice. There both 19, and got married only because she was pregnant. I guess for me its see her all pregnant, knowing here I am a year later and two treatments later, and I am not pregnant. My husband says how can I go and see my friend who had a baby last month, I told him it was hard to see her with that baby. I guess it was slightly easy only, cause she suffered a lose like me. She knows it hard for me to be around her, she has invited me around, since seeing her in the hospital. Yet I have had to no. He feels I am using this against him, and his family. It was a year ago on the 28 of June that we lost our Ole. He got to go to his counselor appointment, yet I had to cancel mine due to the car motor blowing up. I had no one to talk to, I feel raw and hurt he is hurling at me for not wanting to go. What do I do, should I just go, and if I start to cry just walk away, and walk. till I can't see the house any more. Cynthia