stay at home mom vs. single mom

[princessbeth79]

ok, before me and hubby even got married we discussed what our roles would be. we both have very traditional views.... we agreed that he would work and i would stay at home with the kids.  i moved 2 1/2 hours away from my family and friends. moved from the house that i was born and raised in to start a family and a new home with my husband.  that's all fine and dandy.  i have no regrets about staying home with the kids and i am even beginning to adjust to the move (yes, 3 years later lol). 

my husband is fortunate enough to have a good job that provides him with a great salary and health insurance, etc.  now that the economy has gone to the dogs, he has pretty much abandoned me and the kids and is at work 24/7.  he is working an unbelievable amount of overtime to make even more money.  i will give an example.  last week he was at work from thurs. morning to monday night.  he came home late monday night, worked a regular 8 hour day tues.  was off wed. and yesterday (thurs.) he worked until 11pm, and will be at work from fri.-monday night again.  i can't take it! i am here with the boys 24/7. i am 28 weeks pregnant and tired as hell. i don't have anyone to help me..... my mom is dead, my dad works and has heart problems and my sister works swing shift so i don't even know when to call her on the phone anymore lol.  the baby just goes to the door and calls daddy.... and then he cries when i tell him daddy's at work.  the older one actually thinks that daddy lives at work and when he is hom he says 'daddy's visiting us'.  it's so sad........ i am raising these kids on my own. this is not what i signed up for. i could have chosen to be a single mom but you better believe i would still be living near my family.  i am so depressed  about the whole thing. i beg and plead with my husband but he just seems to really think he's some sort of a super-hero daddy because he's making more money.  i tell him all the time that the kids don't care about money (not that he buys them anything anyway)..... they just want to spend time with their daddy and see him once in a while.  i just don't know what to do :(   

[homemommie]

Jul. 10, 2009 at 9:25 PM

Awe! Momma hang in there. I know it is hard. It sounds like your Hubby is really trying hard to keep everything financial stable during this recession. Maybe things will get better soon. What kind of job is it if you don't mind me asking, does it require traveling or something? When you get further along he is gonna have to be around to help out with the other lil ones.

[knagsmom]

Jul. 10, 2009 at 9:27 PM

it will be ok. but he needs to realize that at 28 weeks u need rest. i only had my one yr old when i was 28 weeks so i cant say i know what ur dealing with i just know i wasnt aload to do anything because i could lose the baby. hubby should be at home alittle more money isnt everything

[jjapetigny]

Jul. 27, 2009 at 11:45 PM

Hey lady! I feel your fury! this too shall pass, and you have to remember that We Super Heroes must also have ME time, so if Dad is making more money and spending less time, then how aboout you employ some help that (wont replace Dad) but we help eease the time whehn yoou are feeling overwhelmed and caould use a breather with the kids,Just a thought ! Congrats on the new addition< this too maybe adding on a lot more stress and anxiety< and had it not been for the absence of your Hubby it might be something else LIKE the absence of your finances. Be strong and try to keep a clear head. TTYL

[mamacita69930]

Oct. 18, 2010 at 9:36 PM

Wow what a great husband and what a great wife and momma...Props to you gurl