Life's Mysteries....(a couple bad words!)

[SuperHumanC]

Right as I was beginning to write this, the first time, I decided to go through my journals to see when I last talked about this person and to my dismay, I have NEVER talked about him here! Only on MySpace apparently. *gasp!*

My high school sweetheart, Adrian, and I have been super tight since we were 14 years old. He has been there for me when NO ONE else was...during the good things in my life and during the horrific. We have "dated" off and on since my divorce, but it's never really been "serious" I guess. I don't know LOL it's "complicated" I guess I can say.

To make a verrrrrrry long story short, I will get to the good part! :)

While I was still living in Orlando last year, he moved away to Colorado with some guy friends from high school we know to work at a Ski Resort. Of course, he and I have talked almost every day, seriously(!).

About a month or so ago we were talking late night b/c I couldn't sleep while my SIL was in the hospital (worried sick I guess!) and we were talking about our feelings for each other. We always say "I love you" and he is BY FAR the *best* kisser I've ever kissed. BUT...we've never slept together! He used to spend the night at my house for days at a time, weeks even...and we've done all kinds of stuff, but never that. We were always a bit nervous, maybe? I don't know. Compared to him I'm a total S-L-U-T! (joke) He has only been with 3 women in his life, 2 of which were one night stands. I on the other hand am a bit more....experienced! He is totally emotionally driven, and is a bit effeminate, but not so much to where it's bad. He's totally a man's man...but has feelings. Does that make sense or did I just punk him out? LOL

Anyway, while I have wanted to f**k his brains out, (one night when I got hammered and he was my DD for the night after I left my husband years ago) he has always said he wanted our first time to be special....and definitely didn't want me to be drunk! For a while I thought maybe he didn't wanna sleep with me b/c he wasn't attracted to me (I've gained a whole'nuther person since I was 14! mainly due to my undiagnosed diabetes, which I'm now getting under control and even losing weight! sorry sooooo off subject!)

Nonetheless, I love Adrian but assumed this was just a love I'd have to keep to myself because his life plans were different than mine. Especially once he moved to Colorado...he was so far away and then was planning on moving to Wisconsin! And now I live in Savannah where MY family is, I don't want to move away. (and definitely not while I'm getting extremely cheap medical attention)

So about a month ago or so during our late night chat, we were discussing our feelings for each other. We decided if we were both single when we turn 30, we'd get married to each other. (Cliche' I know) And honestly, at first I was excited! but then I thought about it and felt like what if he changed his mind? What if I missed an opportunity because I was waiting for him...and then he doesn't marry me? I absolutely "what if'd" myself to death...almost.

But I'm a hopeless romantic, so I didn't totally let it get me down. To the contrary, I kinda began to give him reasons why we SHOULD get married and take it seriously. But I also said I love him enough to want him to be happy...even if it's NOT with me. Would I be heartbroken? Yes. I'd recover, eventually.

Two weeks ago, God must have gotten fed-up of my wishing, hoping and praying to him about Adrian. That man called me up after sending me pictures of his hike up this gorgeous mountain that day and changed my life.

He said during his hike he began to clear his head and once he got to the top of the mountain he sat - in awe - and began to think about his life. Where did he want to be? What did he want to do? Etc...

Then he said " Courtney, I love you sooooo much. I love Roman too, he is the coolest kid (except for Eden of course *giggle*)"........."I was doing a lot of soul searching today and God spoke to me, he answered my prayers for the questions I had. I have missed you and Roman so much. I don't want to wait until I'm 30 to call you my wife. If you'll have me, I want to move to Savannah ASAP and I want us to get married!"

(Enter long moment of silence where I sat, smiling, yet unable to speak!)

Then I heard "or maybe not...?....I hope you're smiling.....please say something!"

"YESSSSSSSSSSSS!"

And we both laughed! :)

He also told his mom, who loves me & I love her!, about his intentions and she gave us her blessing!! I am soooo on cloud 9 :)

One little bump has arisen since then: He found out at work he may be promoted in November!! If so, then he will stay until April (I think) until the winter season ends and THEN come.

That doesn't bother me one bit, it will give me more time to slim down before he gets here. But you know what? That doesn't matter either, wanna know why? Because he loves me even though I'm big! He has always told me how beautiful I am no matter what. When I made a crack about using the potential extra time to lose weight so I can look hot in my wedding dress, he said "Courtney, you will always look smokin ass hot to me no matter what size you are, I love YOU unconditionally."

Tell me that isn't the sweetest thing?!

We've even already discussed wedding ideas. Small. Intimate. On the beach! And our honeymoon is gonna be in this special part of Puerto Rico (yes, he is Puerto Rican and born in Mayaguez) I can't wait. Seriously.

I have one question to ask y'all: We're going to be on a budget, (who isn't with THIS economy right?!) Well, y'all know I was married once before (this is his first) well, Dennis only wore his wedding ring that cost me $1500 ---ONCE! On our wedding day, that was it. And it wasn't even a full day. He took it off saying it was too big and he didn't wanna lose a diamond. (There are 5 diamonds in it and it's white gold to match my granny's engagement ring that was given to me which I proudly rocked! and I also bought my wedding band, white gold also with a band of diamonds)

Would it be tacky, or wrong, to re-use those rings and have Adrian buy me another band to add to the other two?

They are beautiful and sit in a box. I want to wear my grandmother's ring, it's gorgeous, and it's 2 karats (1 karat rock in the middle with the other karat divided amongst 2 diamons on each side) ....it's too gorgeous to waste.

And same with Dennis' ring, he wore it for maybe 6 hrs. If that. And it's gorgeous too. But again, has been in a box for almost 5 years.

What do you think?? OH and here he is :)

       :)

[SuperHumanC]

Jul. 19, 2009 at 5:21 PM

For those of you who are on my MySpace...don't say anything about this yet!! I'm keeping it a secret until he gets out here!! Plus, Adrian's SIL is on my Myspace and she's an instigator, and I don't want her to know yet. (Long story LOL)

(Original Poster)

[innocencexinxme]

Jul. 19, 2009 at 5:26 PM

I think that if both parties agree, it is fine. I would love to be able to wear a family heirloom as a wedding ring. I understand being on a budget and my husband and I had talked about me receiving his mother's ring (she passed 7 years ago) but it wont be until after his dad passes that I get it. I would have been livid if my husband had only wore a ring like that for six hours! Hell, he wears his wedding band all the time no matter what even though its a $10 titanium ring from Hot Topic, he adores it. But if you and he both agree on it, I think its safe to say, yes. It would be okay. Does it really matter what other people think?

[booklover1977]

Jul. 19, 2009 at 7:27 PM

Here is what I would do. I would DEFINITALY were my grandmother's ring- that is an heirloom (plus it sounds gorgeous). Then I would get a plain band to wear with your grandmas diamond.  I would sell your exhusband's ring and buy your new fiance a ring- I would look at a pawn shop, they have some really nice rings at rock bottom prices- that way his wedding ring wouldn't have any bad feelings or anything like that attached to it. I honestly would have an issue with wearing my husband's ex's ring- not because it was used- but because it was worn by her.

Whatever you decide I hope that you will all be very happy. Can I just say that I felt like I was reading a movie script. LOL.

Congratulations! 

[daisyb]

Jul. 20, 2009 at 12:20 AM

 

  What a Awesome Little Love Story!! It sounds like you two a definitely a match made in Heaven- Way to go! I agree with booklover1977; maybe look into selling or trading in ex-husband's ring, for another one that will match your grandmothers- Wishing you Lots of Luck- Congratulations!

[SuperHumanC]

Jul. 20, 2009 at 8:09 AM

Thank you!! Yeah I talked to my SIL and she said I should sell the ring and buy another one for Adrian. I'm so excited I can't stand it :)

(Original Poster)

[Terri125]

Jul. 20, 2009 at 9:07 PM

{{{{{{{{{{{{Courtney}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I am SOOOOOOOO Happy for you, you're such a sweet lady and an awesome friend and I need to stop before I start crying & can't see the keyboard...LOL BUUUT...

OK, I'm not trying to be a downer but...DO NOT recycle anything from a previous marriage...I TOTALLY believe in bad vibes, karma, whatever you want to call it.   Think about it, the first marriage didn't work for whatever reasons.  When I got my divorce papers handed to me by the judge, I went home and threw out my wedding dress, the box that had all the cards, champange glasses & cake topper and burned my marriage certificate. 

You can get a really nice wedding set or whatever at awesome prices on QVC.com.  Diamondique looks so much like the real thing. And it won't destroy the buget.   I found this really pretty ring, I think it was like $50 and showed Brian but he wasn't having it, and went out & spent almost $1000 on my engagment ring, but that was 5 years ago when we both had jobs...lol  But still, I'm happy with what I have and it is doable.  So you can get something really nice until you guys can afford something else.