Father..

[SweetPea102689]

 well here it is August and I am about to pop and of course that means horomones are crazy. I have been thinking a lot about my father and it's been making me kinda depressed because I'm sad that we have never had that great of a relationship. A little back ground info~ my father and mother had me when they were 26 and 27.. I was their first and only child.. my dad had wanted a boy and when they found out I was a girl he took off for 2 months, well right after my mom had me her and my father were back together and she went in for a check up with me and they told her they would see her again in a few weeks because she was pregnant again (my sister and I are 11 months and 17 days apart) well don'tcha know another girl. After years of physical and mental abuse from my father my mom finally decided that they should get a divorce he was cheating and a lot of other stuff so they just decided to go their seperate ways. Well my dad met the woman that is now my step mom and I love her to death because she has never done anything wrong to my sister or myself (my paternal grandmother doesn't like her but that is a different story). My stepmom has three boys and all of us kids are a year apart (my brothers are 21,18, and 17 and my sister and I are 19 and 20). Things have always been tight around the holidays at my dad's because of so many kids and my sister and I have always been understanding but this year is the icining on the cake, My dad calls us in the beginning of december and says that we aren't doing an actual Christmas because they just don't have the money to buy for all 5 kids at once.. ok not a big deal.. he said that we were going to set up times for him to take each one of us out and have a set spending limit and that way we get to spend time together and get stuff that we like and blah blah blah.. Well here it is August and I haven't heard anything from my father except when he called in April to ask if  I had anything to tell him and I told him that I was pregnant with a girl.. well he hasn't talked to me since and now that my beautiful little girl is almost here I am wondering if I should even let my father know when I do have her or should I just let him find out.. I am tearing up right now because I don't want him to treat my daughter his first grandchild like he treated his kids just because we are girls.. My mom and her soon to be husband are the greatest and her ex-husband that I grew up calling Daddy and still do because he is the closest thing I ever had to a dad are all very supportive and are all very excited to meet her but in my heart it hurts to know that simply because she is a girl someone will love her less..

i know this is a lot and it is probably all jumbled up I tried to write it the best I could but emotions get in the way and tears make the screen look blurry..

thanks for listening...

[SweetPea102689]

Aug. 1, 2009 at 1:43 PM

bump

(Original Poster)

[MSugarKane]

Aug. 1, 2009 at 1:55 PM

Some men are just not into babies, it doesn't mean he loves you less or the baby less.   He probably just gets caught up in his own personal life and doesn't take the time to stop and give you a call.  Call him, he is who he is and isn't going to change. 

[SweetPea102689]

Aug. 1, 2009 at 9:37 PM

no he has never been active in our lives period.. unless we were playing baseball or doing something sports related

(Original Poster)