Hablando de todo un poco

Little bit of this, little bit of that!

This is a Public Service Announcement for drivers in the Riverside County area of California.

SLOW THE FUCK DOWN

In case you missed the memo, the maximum speed limit on most highways is 65 miles per hour. Sometimes it's 55...sometimes it's 70.  For the most part, though, it's 65.

My two year old son is in the car with me, oh, 95% of the time.  Do you know what that means?  It means that 95% of the time, I'm driving at the posted speed limit.  Yes, I spend the majority of my time in the slow lane, trying to avoid speeding fuckers like you.  I see you coming.  I see you changing lanes: back and forth.  From the fast lane to the center lane to the fast lane again.  Then, you make the brilliant move and cut across one end of the highway to the other and end up behind me: on the slow lane doing 65 miles an hour.

I see you.  I feel you.  How annoying is it that your tail gating isn't making me speed up?  Do you want to piss your pants when you realize I'm not budging?

Good.

I don't care that you're trying to show off your stupid suped up Mustang.  I don't care that the vehicle two cars ahead of us cut you off way back there and you're trying to get him back.  I don't care that you partied hard last night and now you're late to work, school, church: where ever.

Know what I *do* care about?

The little guy in the back seat.  Yes, him I care about.  For him, I wake up extra early to have enough time to get us BOTH ready.  For his safety, I obey speed limits, I give myself extra space between my car and the car ahead of me.  I go as far as keeping an eye two cars ahead of me and behind me.  I cover my bases so that I'm able to stay away and avoid jerks like you.

So.

Keep honking.  Keep flashing your lights.  Keep pissing your pants. 

I'm not moving.

Oh, and your stupid suped up Mustang isn't impressing anyone. 

Just sayin'.


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Comments:

auror...
Aug. 5, 2009 at 9:55 PM

Guys with big suped up mustangs that speed have little teeny weenies.  Just sayin'.  :) 

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Mythi...
Aug. 5, 2009 at 10:13 PM

Well now Katie, I don't know if I want to believe that is true of "Elflaco" next door.. gawd is he hawt. =,( he makes me wish I was single again so he can take me for a ride in his mustang. I need to get some covert pics of this young man to show y'all this temptation living next door.

But yeah, speeders and tailgaters piss the hell out of me too. I've been known to use some ASL on them in the one fingered variety.

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parri...
Aug. 5, 2009 at 10:37 PM

Speeders and reckless driving makes me irritated too! Slow down, there are people on this road that WANT to live !!!

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trepsica
Aug. 5, 2009 at 11:04 PM

i'm one of those assholes who has the sheriff's non emergency number programed into my phone who calls in their plates. MORE THAN ONCE they have had warrants.

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clean...
Aug. 5, 2009 at 11:11 PM

You tell 'em!

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evwsq...
Aug. 6, 2009 at 1:17 AM

You put in a tag just for me! Yay!

I very much agree with you. I may drive over the speed limit usually, but I don't switch lanes or weave in and out of traffic. I go with the flow of traffic only. I don't find those Mustangs cool in any way (sorry, Robyn!).

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logan...
Aug. 6, 2009 at 6:55 AM

That crap pisses me off too. 

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beadi...
Aug. 6, 2009 at 12:42 PM

Woot!  Well said!

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arthi...
Aug. 6, 2009 at 1:09 PM

Good one. I don't budge either so it must be the passive-aggressive in me. All that honking and flashing just makes me drive even more like the little old lady from Pasadena.

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Toddl...
Aug. 6, 2009 at 1:23 PM

I love this. It's so true.

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