My Husband Has Testicular Cancer

[j_mbrady]

Two years ago, my husband went to the doctor's office complaining about a lump on his left testicle.  The doctor dismissed it has an in grown hair.  Later, just this past June...he was complaining about pain and having a hard time peeing.  He went to a different doctor which did some tests and an ultrasound and gave us the news.  He is in stage 1.  This broke my heart and somewhat my spirit.  I don't know how to break this news to my eight year old Cody.  My husband is my son's step-father.  However, they both love each other has though they are biological.  John has been there for my son since he was 3yrs. old.  Cody suffers from ADHD and is also bi-polar.  John says, not to tell him but Cody and I have an open dialog with each other.  Can anyone offer any help on how to tell Cody?

[mierjo]

Aug. 11, 2009 at 12:37 PM

I'm sorry I have no advice but I am praying for your family.

[marie111594]

Aug. 11, 2009 at 3:11 PM

Speaking from a bipolar point of view, honesty is always best (to the extent that he can understand). You don't want him to feel as though you & Dad are hiding something from him. Getting him involved (again, to the extent he can) in Dad's treatment/recovery may also help him to understand the process and make it not so scary for him. Good luck and I will keep your family in my thoughts!

[j_mbrady]

Aug. 11, 2009 at 5:37 PM

Thank you Mierjo and Marie!

(Original Poster)

[v_clar]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 11:40 AM

My son is bi-polar and when we had to tell him about my cancer, we discussed it with his therapist first and had her with us when we told him. She was able to guide us through and was able to help him with his feelings.

If your son has a therapist, I would highly suggest you get them involved.

[j_mbrady]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 11:53 AM

Thank you all for your advice.

(Original Poster)

[Lb128f]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 12:53 PM

I'm sorry. I will be saying a prayer for your DH. As far as telling your son...he's 8, you could just tell him that his Dad has a sore spot that the Doc has to remove. If he asks additional questions then you can tell a bit more. I wouldn't mention Cancer or get into great detail about his Dad's illness. He shouldn't be burdened with the thought of losing his Dad, he doesn't need to carry that stress. And, with medicine, surgery and prayers...I'm sure his Dad is going to be fine.

[nik_nak_mom]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 2:45 PM

Saying a prayer for you DH..As far as telling your son right now,I think you should consider waiting on telling him about the Cancer,since the medications and the test and results could all cure your DH,why put any more stress on your son then he is already dealing with..I will pray for a full recovery for you DH and hope that is does not come down to you having to tell your son..I normally would not agree with a man's choice,but in this case I do..Praying

Amy

[LCSHELTON]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 3:37 PM

Prayers for you and your family.

[j_mbrady]

Aug. 18, 2009 at 1:44 PM

Thank you for all for your prayers and kind words.  I think your prrayers have helped a lot.  We have been told that since being on the medications, chemo and radiation, the cancer cells are starting to shrink.  John still gets swollen and does what he has to do.  However, John has another problem.  He is facing an above knee amputation of his right leg.  John was injured on the job as a paramedic back in 1999.  He suffers from MRSA and VRE which is eating his bones.  He suffers from a leg infection that causes his skin to break down and bleed profusely.  If anyone has any ideas for a fundraiser to help pay for surgery and bills...please let me know.  Thank you!

(Original Poster)