You sound so stupid

[Momma_Halo]

I have heard almost every shocking thing when it comes to the topic of rape.

"She was dressed too sexy."

"She had it coming."

"She was a whore anyways"

Many women who were raped have in fact dressed modestly, it was their first time having sex, and never had anything coming to them. Most would refer to them as the nicest people you could ever meet.

When I was raped it was by my own fiance. I didn't see it coming, I was a good stay at home girlfriend, I dressed modestly, my apartment was always clean, and I tried to please him any way possible. But he still did what he did to me. And this was the kind of hostility I met when I went to seek help.

Another fun question,

"He was your fiance. How could he rape you?"

Simple, no means no and it doesn't matter if it is your husband, fiance, or boyfriend. They are not entitled to take something from you like sex. You still have the right to say no and he should respect that decision.

It isn't about sex... some small cases that could be the case. But it is more about power and control. They could care less if you are wearing a shirt buttoned up to your neck or a mini skirt that showed your butt. You could be a sexual tigress or even a wait until you were married. It just doesn't matter. These people have preferences and have a sick hobby.

There was a mother of one who was grocery shopping in her "mom garb" and was raped in broad daylight, in the middle of a busy parking lot, while her son was in the car.

So do not assume you are safe because you are modest and a good wife. And stop attacking women who were raped. They are not whores and they did NOT deserve what they got. Certain people should think before they speak. Do not assume you know the whole story.

[mcqueenmom]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:31 AM

I dont know what made you post this tonight, I guess someone has hurt your feelings about rape but you are so right. I am not strong enough to tell my story but I know one thing. IT WAS NOT MY FAULT.

[Momma_Halo]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:33 AM

I think a lot of it popped up after my support group discussions. And even listening to my own cousins who do not understand what tact is.

(Original Poster)

[mcqueenmom]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 2:06 AM

good for you, get it out there, you WILL help other moms here on cafe mom!! your great.

[Momma_Halo]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 2:07 AM

I hope I can :).

(Original Poster)

[Momma_Halo]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 11:11 AM

(Original Poster)

[catholicmamamia]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 4:59 PM

No woman deserves violence.

[Momma_Halo]

Aug. 12, 2009 at 7:28 PM

I completely agree!

(Original Poster)