Why do I feel as though I need to convince myself of that? He's a kid, you love your kids, right? Even when they make you go to bed crying every single night, when your blood pressure soars and you end up in the ER, even when they make you feel like the worst parent in the world, hey they even tell you that you are so there are no doubts! If they get into trouble so much that you can recognize a police officer even if he is out of uniform and off duty because you know them well enough. It they abuse you, emotionally, by threats and cursing at you constantly, or physically by throwing things at you or threatening to hit you and you hope they won't but you aren't sure of it. If you can't wait for 4 more years to pass so you don't have to be responsible for him anymore and he can be out on his own.
you ask yourself over and over and over "where did I go wrong, what could I have done differently, why is he like this?" Even if there is a reason that could make him the way he is, abuse of the worst sort by a monster who changed their life and your life forever, how do you forgive yourself for not knowing and not protecting them.? How do you not blame yourself for not stopping it, even though you didn't know?
If they are in trouble because they hang out with the bad kids and now you can't do anything else but pray they change their ways and learn from the hard consequenses. Even though they blame you for their problems and the hard times they are going through.
How do you make sure they know you love him when you are so hurt and angry that all you want to do is push them away? When you do all you can for them, getting them the things they need, but they hate you because you can't give them the things they want like dirtbikes.
Someone please tell me, I am lost, my son is lost, my baby, the one I love so much I would die for him, but I am also responsible enough to turn him in when he is breaking the law and make him face the consequences hoping it will help him change the direction of his life.
Someone tell me, how does this mother's broken heart mend???
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