Old Farmer's Advice (LOL)

[midnitesun]

 

An Old Farmer's Advice:

 

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

 

* Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

 

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

 

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

 

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

 

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

 

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

 

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

 

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

 

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

 

* Every path has a few puddles.

 

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

 

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

 

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

 

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

 

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

 

* Live a good, honorable life.  Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

 

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

 

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain Dance

 

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

 

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

 

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

 

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

 

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

 

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

 

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

 

* Live simply.  Love generously.  Care deeply.  Speak kindly.  Leave the rest to God.

 

-- Don't pick a fight with an old man.  If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.

[elk_huntress3]

Sep. 1, 2009 at 12:31 AM

this was great! especially about the "dont judge folks by their relatives" part! That would toatly F*ck me then! LOL thanks, I needed a good laugh after the messed up weekend I just had