what choices do we have, really?

[6under1roof]

I love reading the suggested reading links at the bottom of the pages here at cafe mom! They allow me to explore other women's journals, and read other groups interesting discussions. Just a few minutes ago I was given the following link:

http://www.cafemom.com/group/99198/forums/read/9744918/Todays_Hot_Topic_9_3_Should_breastfeeding_moms_get_extra_breaks_at_work?next=1#replies

which is a debate article about a female factory employee who was fired because she took extra, unscheduled breaks in order to pump her breasts. The debate question was: "Should breastfeeding moms get extra breaks at work?"

The responses to the article and to each other were very exciting to read, and very thought provoking. I love how even though some of the women disagreed and you could tell they were getting a little heated and snarky, no names were called and nobody lost it completely.

The article itself is very thought provoking, and my initial thought was "hell yes, breastfeeding moms should get some extra time to pump". Then after reading some of the responses I thought a little harder about my answer.

I suppose it is fair to make a blanket statement that if breastfeeding women get extra time, so should non breastfeeding employees. But I'd like to delve into it a little more, if for nothing more than to have my voice heard.

A point was brought up that it is a mother's choice to breastfeed, so an employer should not be required to make accomodations to benefit our life choices. And the latter part I can certainly agree with. As was brought up in the debate numerous times, people who choose to smoke should certainly not be allowed extra breaks to go outside and light up. And this is coming from a former smoker of almost 12 years. And when it comes to the question I have posed- what choices do we have, really? Smoking. Smoking is a choice. OK that was easy enough to answer.

So when parents ask to leave work early to pick up their sick child and take them to the doctor, how do most employers respond? In my own experiences it's been about a half and half response. But I did have to be careful about how often these days sprung themselves. Once in a while there usually wasn't a problem. And when it comes down to it, when daycare calls and says "come get your child, (s)he's sick" and the option to go retrieve your child and lose your job or leave your child and lose your daycare and possibly be reported to a CPS, not to mention basically ignoring your sick child, I can feel pretty secure in assuming 99% of women would tell their employers to shove it and go get their babies. So how many non-parents complain when mommy needs to go pick up sick baby, or has to call in sick because of sick baby? Again- this usually comes down to a toleration- in the beginning most people are sympathetic, but when the power is abused that's when people tend to become intolerant of the absences. But what if your child has a chronic condition? Or what if, just because they are IN daycare they are CONSTANTLY sick- since all of us mothers know that daycare facilities aren't exactly the portrait of cleanliness. Sorry, you can put out all the bottles of hand sanitizer you want, daycares are a peitri dish of bacteria simply because of the amount of children involved.

So do we have a choice to put our kids in daycare?

Well, let's see- do you have a job outside the home? Then you must have someone to attend to your child- law mandates that. And if you have no relatives or friends to babysit, can't locate a babysitter, and can't hire a nanny then no, there's no choice but to put your kids in daycare if you want to work outside the home.

But wait- someone else mentioned as well it is our choice to have children. We shouldn't be given any leeway because we made that choice

So do we have a choice to have children?

Absolutely.  We have a choice to have sex or not. We have a choice to use birth control or not. And don't bother telling me 'well my birth control failed so I had no choice' - sure you did. You had the choice to continue the pregnancy or abort it, and again, don't bother telling me 'well I don't believe in abortions so I had no choice" abortions are still legal, it's your choice whether to have one or not, it's your choice to believe in them or not. But they are real, and they are available, so you have a choice. And if your birth control fails, and you don't believe in abortions then there's always the option to put your child up for adoption. This is your choice. Hand your child over to a company who will find it a new home, or take it home and keep it. This is your choice.

So obviously for some reason or another we have chosen to have children. Now-

Do we have a choice whether to work or not?

I suppose so. I mean, one could not work and not have an income and not have a home and not have food. Could live on the streets with their infant and attempt to eat and sleep at the local shelters whenever possible. Or perhaps qualify for welfare, food stamps, rental assistance etc. so that many of the month to month bills are paid for you but you never have any money to buy toys or new clothes- and certainly no money to actually ENJOY life. Or you could CHOOSE to be a responsible parent, get a job, pay your bills, and put your child in daycare while you work.

So now you have chosen to have a child. And you've also chosen to have a job.

Do you have a choice whether to breast feed or formula feed?

Wow. This is such a hard question to answer in my opinion. I mean... breast milk is a natural food for infants. God provided us with the anatomy to feed our children with our bodies and provide them with the nutrition they need to thrive. There is a small percentage of women who in all honesty do NOT have this option, because for some medical reason they can not produce breast milk. Then, no, they really don't have a choice. But aside from those circumstances you have mothers who are completely capable of breastfeeding- why would you NOT want to? Why DO you have a choice to formula feed? At what point in history did our society turn breastfeeding from feeding our babies into an option we can indulge in if we have time. And honestly I can't even think of any "that's like doing this instead of that" examples because there's just nothing I can think to compare to right now... and I've wracked my brain. But when it comes down to it I just can't fitgure it all out. I mean, that's what breasts are FOR. They're not jewelery that just hang around to look good. They're not toys for our husbands to play with. Their entire purpose is to feed babies. A woman who doesn't have children may as well not have them because they are not what defines us as female. Somewhere along the line this can of powder appeared on the store shelves and was marketed as a 'simpler, faster, easier way to feed a baby that's just as good'. I just don't see any truth in any of that. How on earth is it simpler, easier, faster, or just as good? Let's see- baby is screaming hungry, go all the way into the kitchen, get bottle and nipple and nipple ring nut thingy out of cabinet, let water run til warm, fill bottle up. Open can of powder (close eyes so as not to get the powder puff in them), measure scoop(s). Assemble bottle, shake (oh yes, lots of tiny bubbles to irritate baby's belly). Go back to baby and sit down, hold baby and feed (once you finally get them to calm down enough to latch on). Then sit with baby while (s)he eats bottle. Now- how is that easier or faster or more convenient than: Baby sreams when hungry, lay baby down, expose nipple, insert into screaming hole, sit with baby while (s)he eats. I mean, there are those women, please do not raise your hand, who go through all the trouble of making a bottle then prop it up on a pillow next to baby's head and go do whatever they want while baby eats. I guess if you're one of those women formula feeding may be easier for you, but, please, I don't want to hear about it. And don't get started on 'it's just as good' ok it will do, babies DO survive on formula. But I guess it's like the difference between a gallon of cow's milk and a package of powdered milk. Which would you choose? And we all know science has proven that breastmilk is just plain better for babies- boosts their immune system, is all natural, nothing synthetic, and all the vitamins/minerals/calories baby needs without having to scientifically reproduce it.

The other BIG thing is that breastmilk is FREE. Formula is NOT. Formula is actually QUITE expensive. Soooo you'd rather choose to buy a can of formula once a week (anywhere from $8-$14 depending on brand) buy bottles and nipples, a bottle brush, deal with sterilizing and cleaning (so you're buying extra soap), and perhaps a bottle drying rack. Not to mention take up space in your cabinets with all of these supplies.
So we come back to whether or not working is a choice. So we choose to go back to work and continue breastfeeding. This option may be similar in price when it comes down to it-  there's the inital cost of a breast pump- which I might mention there are programs for where you can get one free or discounted- a few bottles for feeding and/or storage, generally whatever mommy pumps today baby will eat tomorrow- many working moms don't build up a stock in the freezer, so they don't buy extra storage bottles or bags. Then we do have the expense of the sterilizer, extra soap, a bottle brush, and possibly a drying rack. The initial cost of the pump can probably be closely compared to the cost of formula over a period of time depending on the quality of the pump you purchase. Then again, even a $150 pump will pay for itself after 19 cans of formula. Do you think you can feed a baby for a year with 19 cans of formula? And that's with the cheap $8 formula! And I might also mention that all the supplies needed for pumping usually fit nicely into cases provided upon purchase of the pump. You'll still have to house your brush, drying rack, and feeding bottles, and use fridge/freezer space for milk, so I guess it's about the same there. So what did we find out- storage is similar, cost is still less to breastfeed and pump at work, and actual preparation and feeding time is quite different.

Despite the fees associated with pumping milk at work to provide food for your baby, I still say formula feeding is a choice, not breastfeeding. You can choose NOT to breastfeed- but why would you? And we've already discussed the fact that saying it's easier, faster, more convenient, and just as good are not valid points. I suppose when you're working it is easier to bottle feed because you don't have to pump, but then you get back in to spending all that money on those cans of fakeness. So yeah, it may be more convenient while you're at work, but not while you're at home, and it certainly costs a lot more money, which makes it LESS convenient, MUCH harder, and really not any easier in the long run. If you can come up with the initial cost of supplies that's it! you don't have to worry about whether or not you'll have enough money after bills to buy your baby more food!

So maybe you see it as you do have a choice to breastfeed or bottlefeed. I see it as a choice to not breastfeed.

In conclusion, my answer to the debate question, 'should breastfeeding mothers be given extra breaks to pump milk' I think no, they should not be given EXTRA breaks, but they should be given their alotted breaks in accordance to typical feeding schedules. 15 minutes every 2-3 hours. and one of those 15 minutes should be part of your lunch. For an example an 8 hour work day is usually 8 hours of work + 30 or 60 minutes for lunch. So you punch in at 8, take your first break at 10 and pump. Take 30 minute lunch at noon and pump. Take 15 minute break at 2:30 and pump. Get off at 5- go pump. I can't reacall the law, but it does require you to get so many breaks for so many hours worked. I don't see why any woman would need more time than this to pump. And all other employees should get the same amount of time for their breaks. And all employees should allow pumping mothers a secluded place to pump in peace instead of a bathroom stall.

[3_ring_circus_]

Sep. 4, 2009 at 12:47 AM

that was  well thought out and very well said! I love it! For the record I pumped while working I just closed my office door put a sign on it that said privacy please and used my phone and IM to talk to anyone in the office while still working. Not everyone has that option so I agree with you the breaks should be given according to the feeding schedule.

[6under1roof]

Sep. 9, 2009 at 4:39 PM

thank you 3 ring circus!  i bet it was great being able to just shut your door and take care of business! I'm very envious!! When I did work and pump I was a cashier at walmart, I utilized the same break schedule as everyone else and they did provide me with an office to pump in, so it wasn't too bad. I think even if someone is used to nursing on a different schedule than that it only takes a week or so to get your breasts onto a new schedule. So one week of a little discomfort and you can get into your new schedule. I just don't see it as being so hard.

(Original Poster)

[Daynaof3]

Sep. 10, 2009 at 9:35 PM

Well hopefully soon it won't be a debate. Laws are being formulated and many passed to help support and encourage breastfeeding in the workplace. Breastfeeding is considered a public health issue.

Formula fed babies are statistically sick more often causing their moms to miss work more than breastfeeding moms. They also have higher health care costs.