Ramblings...

[beanielips]

My hair is falling out.

My eating habits are horrible.

I am not hungry, yet ravishing at the same time.  ( I have the hunger pains, but nothing looks good and makes me want to vomit.... that is unless it is high in sugar and fat, so, I eat sparingly)

I want to sleep all the time.  Even after 10 hours of sleep I am still exhausted.

I can't concentrate.

What is doing this to me?
Stress.
Anxiety.
Depression.

What is at the root of those things?
Work.
Love.
Kids.
Commitments.
Life......

What do I have control over?
My attitude.

How I deal with it?
Exercise.
Force good things into my body.
Accept most of the things are out of my control.

How am I doing on those things?
Exercise 4-6 days a week (cardio and weights)
Sit and eat "normal food"- allow for comfort foods without guilt
Worry that things out of my control are conspiring to make my life hell.

Yeah... not doing so well.

Firmly planted into a pity party.  Not even sure if I want to leave.

The odd effects of this... weight loss.  Normally once classes start back I stop losing weight or gain some just with not being able to plan meal and excercise like I did during the summer.... yet, 3 weeks into school I have lost around 6 pounds.  It isn't the best way to lose weight, but I have to find a silver linning in the black cloud that is making me bald!

 

[Jennibug]

Sep. 5, 2009 at 5:13 PM

Eeee! Be careful. I am not usually one to go straight to clinical medications for normal life issues, but you may really be in need of some happy help. It sounds like you are falling into, or maybe fallen, clinical depression. You have a lot on your plate and in your heart. Take care of yourself and seek help before you're in a place you don't know how.

 

[Kajenloca]

Sep. 5, 2009 at 6:28 PM

Oh, HUGS.:( This can not be a good way for weight loss!! Maybe you have a deficiency somewhere? I don't think I have heard of depression causing weight loss...Check with your dr. to make sure. Take care of yourself!!

[beanielips]

Sep. 6, 2009 at 3:10 AM

Thank you both of you....

Once I sit and let myself vent about thikngs I start to feel better...

I did get up today, workout and then go tomy cousin's bridal shower.  I even had a "date night" with my sweetie and got some papers graded.

I am hae always struggled with depression, but so long as I take the time to write and journal, things get better.  But you are right... I need to be on top of things.

As far as the weight loss... who knows.  When my late hubby was so sick I dropped 20pounds in 2 or so months.  Thankfully... I have lots to lose so it doesn't seem to hurt me too much.  Well, other than when the external stuff goes away I tend to gain it back.

Sometimes, what I need most is a hug... and thank you so much for filling that void today!

(Original Poster)