SECRET TO LIFE! WHY AM I JUST FIGURING THIS OUT??

[nEwMoMmY041408]

So, ladies, I have figured out the secret to life.....you guys ready for this??? IT GOES ON...  I have spent quite of a bit of time on this earth wondering, what is going to happen now???  When I was with my first serious bf and we went through all those things....why was I so upset?  And now that I'm with my husband, and all that we have gone through....with the lies, the cheating, the manipulating, the lies, and the LIES!!  Why do we stand for it?  Why do we say all we want is happiness and then we stay with these creeps?  We don't need anyone to make us happy....even our kids whom we love with all our hearts cannot MAKE us happy.  We choose to be happy....we choose to be overflown with  joy when we look at them....and we can choose to be happy without these jerks in our lives.  We are choosing to stay...  If you think for a moment that life will end when you leave, or that he is going to find someone else and treat them right, or you can't stand the fact of him seeing someone else...well, the fact is....he will NOT ever treat anyone like they deserve.....and he's probably seeing other people anyways...mine was.  And the truth is...if you just let them go...you don't have to worry about it anymore.  Soon enough, the thought won't even cross your mind...you won't care....you'll smile....you'll laugh...you won't think of him...LIFE WILL GO ON!  Yes, my husband has been gone for 2 weeks almost...not a very long time.  But I can tell you this....life has had many more ups than downs since he left...yes, I have been hurt, I have cried, I have felt like I never wanted to leave my bedroom again....but life kept coming....monday came, and I had to go to school, same tuesday and wednesday and thursday...and by friday, I felt good.  Usually, when he didn't call last night, and I got that sinking feeling in my stomach ( you guys know what I"m talking about), I would cry, I would get so upset....but last night I didn't.  I just ignored it....because, truth be told....that whole out of sight, out of mind thing really can work to your advantage.  Now, its Saturday morning, and yes, the jerk called spilling out his many apologies that I can almost say word for word as he is saying them.  I was not moved...I told him, like you said, YOU messed up, and now YOU can deal with that.  I have washed my hands....My life was going without him before....my life kept going with him, and my life will keep on going without him now.  This is true with any situation you are going through.  Just walk away and make the CHOICE to not let it get you down.  Make it a point to laugh during the day....say hi and smile to people on the street...don't let that SOB, (excuse the language) get you down.  You're too beautiful...we all are...make YOU happy....quit worrying if he is happy...quit worrying if he's okay....Here's the truth...He's NOT happy....He's NOT okay....and no love is going to change that....just like no love given to us will make us happy.  He chooses to be the way he is....and we must choose to be the way we want to be.  And I am tired of crying...i want to smile, i want to laugh, i want ME back, and when life keeps moving, I want to keep moving right along with it.

[lovelygirllmt]

Sep. 12, 2009 at 10:33 AM

You should read the book "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. It changed my life so much I got a tattoo b/c of it! lol.

[JHall]

Sep. 12, 2009 at 3:11 PM

See,  I like what you say it is very true life will  go on.  We lost our youngest daughter last Nov she was 14 months old and yes it was hard on everyone in the family I was depressed and very angry hubby was very depressed and my mother in law I think took it really hard she blames her self even now.  Well Sept 10 would have been her second B day and I was so not looking foward to this day but I got up that day and felt good in an odd way,  I looked at the phone and noticed that my MIL had called twice I checked the messages and on both she was just crying.  So I called her back and even then crying.  I have told her that Celeste is happy now and in no pain anymore and that is what made me feel better through all of this.   months after the loss of Celeste hubbys grandad passed and that was hard on all of us mainly me just too much too soon and a month after that hubby lost his job due to massive layoff.  As much as we would just like to shut ourselves up in a room somewhere life does go on with or with out you.  Now I did tell hubby that I am no longer gonna go over to the in laws cause they feel like they do not have to come and see us ever we always go to them and hour away the last time my MIL was even over was Sept 10th but before that was January for hubbys b day.  I feel like after everything we have gone through that we should be met in the middle but they have the excuse that they work all day and just want to relax at home,  but hey you come to us...LOL  I do not think so hubby tells them you know where we live and leaves it at that.  We are suppose to go over to day or well MIL said we are coming over and that everyone is expecting us there,  some people we have never met b4 but hey it is our life too and if we don't get the chance to meet well hey life goes on and we'll see you on the flip side...LOL

[Nikkibaby123]

Sep. 13, 2009 at 3:29 PM

I AM SOO HAPPY YOU FINALLY GOT YOURSELF TOGETHER!!!

YOU DO NOT NEED HIM KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND YOU WILL BE OKAY!!!