I am sick of it. Stop right now.
I am a size 2 on my most bloated days. I am an attractive woman, or so I have been told. I weigh 115 lbs. I don't exercise, because frankly, I hate it and chasing a two year old around ought to count for something. I eat cheese and carbs. I drink beverages that aren't diet, and honestly, I never will drink diet. I eat greasy, fried foods like there is no tomorrow.
THAT DOES NOT GIVE ME THE INSIDER KNOWLEDGE OF THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS!!!!!!!!!
Just because I am thin, and am so without dieting or exercise, does NOT mean I am not allowed to have feelings, much less negative ones. It does not mean I can wear "anything". It doesn't make me a shallow, vacuous idiot.
I have the same life as you--I just am thin. I have a husband who is deployed. I scare myself silly sometimes thinking of what could happen to him. I have a two year old who can drive me up a wall. My relatives and in-laws make the Osbournes look like Ward and June Cleaver. I do not have a perfect life, I am just thin.
I find clothes I like everywhere. Only problem is, they are never in my size. Yes, that's right, they are never in my size! All I can ever find in clothing styles I like are the so-called plus sizes. (Women who wear these are NOT plus, they are average and just as beautiful as any other woman alive.) I found an adorable top that would have looked great on me and bonus! It was on clerance for a buck fifty! Woot! The smallest size? XL. Great, because THAT will fit. I am not on the secret fashion mailer, I am just thin.
I am not an idiot. My IQ is higher than 92% of the American population. I know the difference between effect and affect. I know alot is actually spelled a lot. My husband, who is a very intelligent man, can't even understand what I say half the time. My name isn't Muffy or Candy. I am not dumb, I am just thin.
I can't even get a decent job because of my size. Oh, don't believe me? 80% of the interveiwers for positions in the area I live are women. Most of them are not a size 2 or even close to it. They take one look at me and little frown lines appear between their eyebrows. I never get the job. In the ones where a man interviews me, he spends more time staring at my tits than my resume(and yes I have started wearing turtlenecks to interviews with men--they stare at my tush instead). When they hire me(which they always do) I quit within a week, because an hourly game of slap and tickle wasn't in the job description, and I have no desire to put it in.I am not paid more for my size. I can't even get the job, I am just thin.
I am not anorexic or bulimic or the possesor of any eating disorder. I am just thin.
I don't have constant great hair days. I am just thin.
I have a monthly period which suck big ole monkey turds. i am just thin.
I AM A HUMAN, I AM JUST THIN!
Stop being hateful to me. Stop telling me you hate me because you do not wear my dress size. It hurts. I don't care if you are joking. I still have feelings! I do not tell you I hate you because you wear clothes I cannot find in my size, do I? If I were to say that to you, you would hurt. I feel that way everytime you say it to me.
I have not always been pretty, trust me. I had a mullet and coke bottle glasses in middle school. I didn't even NEED a TRAINING bra until I was 16. I was teased mercilessly every day for three years in school. I still carry the emotional scars of that. I may be thin on the outside, but I am still human inside. I still have a tender heart that hurts when you make fun of me, when you say you hate me, when you dislike me because I don't look just like you, when you look at me with disgust because I do not look just like, when you treat me like I have the bubonic plague just because I DO NOT LOOK JUST LIKE YOU!!!
I am human. I have a tender heart. I need your friendship, just as you need mine. Stop hating me because I am not just like you. Let's celebrate our differences instead and find what is inside each other that we can love. I know we can do it.
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