He's leaving me.

[Darlinree]

He's leaving me.  Why?  I guess sometimes it's just time.  I don't want it to be time.  I don't want him to grow up.  I want my lil man to return to the little baby I once breastfed and rocked to sleep.  He's just not my baby anymore.  He is smart, independent, and braver than I.  He is exactly as I have raised him, so why am I so damn sad that he has turned into the wonderful big boy I dreamed of?

His first day of school was a heartbreaking moment for me.  He had to be reminded to kiss me goodbye.  He was so excited to go to school that he could care less that this was our first time apart.  He marched into that school without a care in the world.  I, on the other hand, could only think of him all day.  Was the teacher being nice to him?  Did he make friends easily? Did he miss me like I missed him?

 How do you let go of your first born?  I prepared him for this moment but I forgot to prepare myself.  I came to the sudden brutal realization that my baby boy is all grown up.  For him this was probably the best day ever, but for me it was the worst.

[elijahmom]

Sep. 16, 2009 at 9:22 PM

i feel the same way. i cried all day on my son's 1 day of school. and now my second son is turning 1 next week. it is making me feel so sad thinking about it. good luck.

[cleanaturalady]

Sep. 16, 2009 at 9:25 PM

I feel your pain, mama.  It was way harder on me than on my first when she went to kindergarten.  She was like - bU-bye, mommy! and off she went.  It's hard but you can rest assured that you are raising a healthy happy individual who knows who he is and isn't afraid of new things.  That is great.

[anime_mom619]

Sep. 16, 2009 at 9:37 PM

I know how you feel. When I sent my oldest off to Kindergarten, I cried half the morning.  Now I'm worried about the big crying mess I'll be in less than 3 years when she graduates from high school. : ( In 2 years she'll be starting her senior year... I don't even want to think about it. But the years when they're in school are great. You grow with them and closer to them in some ways as you remember what it was like when you were in school.

[lovnmy3boys]

Sep. 16, 2009 at 10:12 PM

Enjoy every day, every moment...I'm sure you've heard it more than once, but they DO grow up - so fast!!

My oldest marched off to school just like that not that long ago- he's married and a college graduate now.

My second son leaves for college this weekend- talk about heart breaking. I know I should be happy and proud of him, but, I miss him already.

At least I have my little one at home...but now I knpw how fast it goes!

[used2chaos]

Sep. 16, 2009 at 10:12 PM

I feel your pain, my friend.  My twins are almost 10!  My heart takes turns alternating between feeling like it will burst with pride, and breaking that they are no longer little. 

*smooches*