Feeling A Little Down

[PrincessNicole]

I am feeling a little down today.  I know most of it (if not all of it) is probably pregnancy hormones.  But I still thought that if I write about stuff it might help me feel better. 

I look nice today.  Accept that my outfit is a little dressy and the only shoes that are really comfortable to wear are my sneakers.  So, from the ankles up I look nice.  From the ankles down...not so much.  But hey...we're going to the grocery store later and if I can't walk, I won't be much good, will I?

Since I looked so nice today, I thought I would try and wear my contacts.  I tried to put them in and one of them is ripped.  I gave it a few minutes to get used to it but it was no use.  My eye was too irritated.  So, I'm back in my glasses.  We don't really have the money right now to go and get our eyes checked either to get new ones.  I know Craig needs them too.  I was gonna wear my contacts (and not hide behind my glasses, cuz that's what it feels like I'm doing) today and wear make up for my husband.  I really wanted to dazzle him when he came home.  I'm not sure he'll be dazzled at all by just my nice outfit.  That kind of makes me sad.  So, even though I'm trying to look good for him, I feel like I might as well be in sweat pants. 

The other thing that makes me sad is the fact that Craig and I haven't been out on a date in a LONG time.  And I know that isn't his fault at all.  It's because of our finances.  I know if he had his way, he would take me out every weekend.  Right now SO much of his paycheck is going to pay back child support to JJ's Mom.  I'm thankful that's almost paid but they are going to continue to take it out just because it's NY state and that's what they do until they figure out that it's already been paid.  Our bills are high right now and we're only surviving on one income because my child support money is only $50 a month.  Woo-Hoo.  I just wish there was some time for me and Craig to get out and spend an evening together going to a movie or dinner or something.  It doesn't even have to be all that expensive.  I just miss time with him.  Yes, we spend every evening on the couch watching TV together but it's just not the same.  I love him so much and I'm beginning to look in the future to December when the baby comes and then we really won't be able to get away because I'll be nursing.  I'm just wishing we could get some dates in before the baby comes. 

Maybe things would feel better to me if I got out of the house once in a while during the day.  But I don't have a license and so I can't even drive Craig to work and keep the car to go and visit my Mom.  It gets very lonely here during the day.  And in the beginning, talking with my friends on the phone kind of made up for a lot of the lonliness I was feeling.  It's not working so well anymore.

Anyway, I just wanted to write my feelings somewhere and I figured this was a good place cuz I know a lot of you have been in the same boat, or close to it.  Thanks for reading. :)

[HarleyGirl740]

Sep. 25, 2009 at 4:36 PM

Hello there....well i haven't never spoke with ya before but you can im me anytime if you wanna talk.....I'm not pregnant right now.....i have three teenagers and fixin to be a nana in 2010. It's always nice to meet new moms and make new friends:)) I wouldn't worry about all how ya look as long as you r comfortable.......it could be worse:)) anywhoo...i just wanted to say hello and i hope your day gets better.....take care

[TLozier]

Sep. 26, 2009 at 10:26 AM

I'm here if you ant to talk. Unfortunately, I'm in the same boat as you. We've been saving all our money for the baby and haven't been on a date in forever either. I feel like since I've been pregnant everything is left for me to do when I get home. There is no help from him what-so-ever. My hours have been cut at work, so not bringing in nearly as much. Everything pretty much sucks right now. I hope things get better for you. If you need to vent...you know where to find me.

[Mrs.SassyPants]

Sep. 27, 2009 at 8:15 PM

I'm sorry that you're down. :-(