Foolish man...he WENT THERE. (warning, crude language and gross mental pictures)

[scarrymama]

     So my day was pretty good. I got the house cleaned, myself cleaned...haha...the dishes were done, dinner was under control. Cookies were baking in the oven, awaiting the arrival of the first wave of kids home from school. But it had started to rain...so being the supermom that I am, I jumped into the car and made my rounds to pick up the kiddies so they didn't have to walk home in the rain. Sigh...what a good day it was...how quickly it all unraveled. My dear hubby got home early from work and he was in such a nice mood! Yay!!! Unfortunately, early this morning I got some unexpected company from my Aunt Flow. Ugh. She has been coming to visit twice a month for several months now, and let's just say that she's worn out her welcome! =0) ANYWAY...I mentioned that so that you can understand what I mean when I say that something my man said just set me off. I mean SET ME OFF. Did I freak out? Surprisingly...NO. haha Instead, I said something about the cookies needing to be pulled from the oven, and rushed out. Down in the kitchen, I took several deep breaths and evaluated my emotions. I realized that though my feelings had validity, I was over-reacting and I needed to chill. I am super emotional when that Auntie of mine is visiting, crying at every stupid commercial and today even at Phinneaus and Ferb (yes, I am totally losing it) While I was calming myself, hubby comes down and says that he's gonna go pick up our youngest and will be back. I can tell he's butt hurt. Not just butt hurt...but the kind of butt hurt that's going to cause a scene. I say to him...'listen, this isn't you. It's me. don't freak out and take this personal, just give me some space and know that it's ME and not you.' He gives me that puppy dog look (which makes me want to kick him!) haha Anyway, when he gets home, he goes upstairs and lays down. I follow him up to try and explain to him how I just neededa minute to calm down and explain to him what had set me off....did he let me get that far??? No. He foolishly interrupted. Not wise. I had also come up to the bedroom not just to tell explain myself, but I had come up to change my stinking tampon that I had just bled thru in about 25 minutes!!!! When he interrupted me I just lost it! As I started to yell I could feel the blood gushing out between my legs. Ruining my favorite pair of panties. (yes, I'm retarded for wearing them while auntie was visiting, so sue me.) I turn and go into our master bathroom and slam the door, refusing to continue to yell, it just isn't worth it...but when I pull my panties down and see the damage....when I am trying to change my tampon and the cramps are doubling me over and the blood is gushing out like I just gave birth (hey, if it's too much info for you, you should have taken the warning to heart.) As all of these things are happening I just lost it. I opened the bathroom door to shout at him one more time that if he would just get off my ass and let me breathe and not take everything so dang personal, that we wouldn't even be having this fight...and that to give me a break because I am emotional right now and on my period. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Never use it as an excuse. I never do. I wasn't today. Foolishly I was trying to explain why I was so WRONG. ;0)

     Well I finished my business and went down and cooked dinner, everything was fine. Except that he wouldn't talk to me at dinner. Wouldn't say a word. Wouldn't look at me, didn't participate in any way. Sure, he put his plate in the sink...but that's it. He went upstairs and said not a word. Oh was I steamed!! Grow the !@#$up!!! I'm not one to just leave it. No. I had to go upstairs and see what was wrong...only to find him getting ready to leave because according to him, he's not going to deal with my emotionalism because I'm on my period!!!!!!!!!!!!! Uh-oh. He really shouldn't have said that. So yes, he left....(he had to go to the bank, he didn't run off on me! haha) and I sat at the table plotting revenge. I thought of doing something absolutely disgusting and wrong. I wanted to piss him off and gross him out...and really I wanted him to see what an asshole he is to say ANYTHING about the 'emotionalism' of mine while my auntie is here....I was going to take all of my bloody tampons and set them all around his sink. I was going to draw nasty words all over his mirror in...you guessed...BLOOD. Oh, I had so many good ideas!~! But then I realized a few things....first of all, I realized who would be cleaning it all up. =0) When I thought about THAT, and about how really gross it really was....I did the next best thing. I went and poured myself a glass of wine which I downed like a shot, and quickly poured another...and then I came up here and logged onto Cafemom so I could bitch about what an asshole my husband was today. There. I feel so much better now, and there's no mess to clean. Niiiice. And to be honest....even though he really WAS an asshole today...he's really a pretty great guy. He deals with my bullshit and stays anyway.....haha...thanx for letting me vent.

[Kimi258]

Oct. 14, 2009 at 11:10 PM

That was hilarious! And Gross!

[eatmyshorts]

Oct. 14, 2009 at 11:15 PM

eww...men just dont get it!

and in the end you were completely right..not worth the mess you woulda hadta clean! lol

[Guinhyvar]

Oct. 14, 2009 at 11:17 PM

Vent away! Whether we care to admit it or not, this time of the month is a pain in more ways than one. YES, we are more sensitive than normal, oh well. Nature of the beast :) However, sounds like your man was having some PMS issues of his own! lol Hang in there, girl.

[anotherandree]

Oct. 14, 2009 at 11:24 PM

This was DISGUSTING!  Ha!  Glad you can vent in such a great way.  I'm also glad you came to your senses!  I could not imagine cleaning that up...  :)

[Barbwirenrozes]

Oct. 14, 2009 at 11:39 PM

you are tooo flippin funny!!!!

[ccspiratemama]

Oct. 15, 2009 at 11:36 AM

I Heart you! :-) Sorry about the frustrating day!

[supamomfor3]

Oct. 15, 2009 at 7:50 PM

Haha your bloody SICK Ang but I love you!

[SalBac]

Oct. 26, 2009 at 10:33 AM

Thanks for a great laugh! Sorry you paid such a price for it! I hope your vent was cathartic. Hey, we all need to do that sometimes. Hope you're feeling better now :)

[CrazeeCowgirl]

Nov. 13, 2009 at 3:14 PM

You sound alot like me Angie.... i would be the same way if it was me, Ha!! Ha!!! i needed a great laugh.... Love ya Girl!!!