Questionable Teacher: Am I Wrong? What Else Can I do?

[Lynard69]

Oh where to begin.  My son has PDD with that he is behind in some of his learning in school, otherwise he can function well enough to go into a normal classroom.  Last year with his IEP it was decided he would be put into the Wilson Reading program, going once a week.  It was also decided that he would need to have a teacher with patience and understanding.  One who would talk to him calmly and be able to explain things to him to avoid meltdowns.

He started second grade this year.  Whenever I ask Roan about his school day he is usually very vague or says he don't know.  It wasn't until around the time of the open house that I found out he was in the special education class for half a day this year.  I thought, ok, maybe they changed it and it's probably better if he is.  He does need help with reading and writing and spelling, the english cirruculum, I guess you could say.

A week later, mid-term reports came home saying he wasn't returning his homework in his special ed class.  Well this is news to me because I didn't know he had daily homework in there.  So I write a note asking about the homework, etc.... I apologized because I felt it was my fault for not knowing.  I spoke with Roan and asked that he bring it home.  The teacher calls me within an hour after school started.  I asked about the type of writing paper, not knowing what kind they required in there.  Her response was, "I don't care if it's done on a paper bag!".  This was a little shocking to hear from a teacher to say the least.  I asked if spiral notebook paper would be ok, she again repeated the paper bag statement.  This type of statement coming from a teacher didn't settle well with me, but I let it go, thinking well, she's having a bad day or something.  My son didn't bring home his homework which mainly had to do with spelling words.  Each day had an assignment for them that he was to do at home.  He said he didn't know where the spelling list was, that she didn't give him one.  So, of course I sent another note asking that she please give him another. 

This took place on a Thursday and Friday.  Over the weekend, as we were doing his homework.  Which we were making up for the past two weeks.  He informs me that this teacher has been yelling at him for my notes.   I figured it was just her raising her voice.  He says no, she was yelling and that she screams at everyone for the smallest thing. 

I called his speech teacher, which he has been seeing through the school system for the last four years.  She informs me that I need to contact the Special Ed. Administrator and request a meeting with her, the teacher and whomever else I want.  The Sp. Ed Admin.  tells me she will have to look into it and will get back to me in a week.  She didn't at all seem concerned about this teachers behavior.  I felt as if she was blowing me off.  In her investigation, she would have to inform the teacher why she was investigating her.  What the hell, the fox isn't going to steal the eggs when the farmer is watching now is he?  She also informed me that his IEP was misread and he was only supposed to be in this class for reading. So she called the school and had his schedule changed immediately.  

I explained to Roan about the mix-up so it wouldn't be a shock to him going in on Thursday.  He was still eager to get to that class to turn in his homework to earn stars for a "Happy Meal" ticket.  I never heard him talk about earning stars for a happy meal prior to this.  It wasn't until his schedule was changed that he mentioned being able to get one.  I got a call from his second grade teacher asking that I speak to him because he was hysterical crying because he wanted to go to his special ed class.    Luckily, I was able to calm him down over the phone and assured him he would be able to turn in his homework for his stars.  He was under the impression that he would get the ticket with that turn in, but he came home saying he needed more stars.

When I picked him up the next day, Friday, he told me it was my fault he wasn't getting a happy meal ticket.  Oh really?  Says who?  This teacher, Mrs. Furor.  She told him, he can't get a ticket, he can't earn it either, because your mom (me) don't want you in there to do the work for it.  OMG!  I was livid!  As a professional, this is not how you handle that type of situation.  Especially if you're a special educational teacher you should know that's not how you handle things!

That was one week ago yesterday when I put in the call to Mrs. Earley, the Sp Ed Administrator.  I called today since I haven't heard back and was told that there was nothing she could do.  She checked in on Mrs. Furor and she didn't hear her yelling or raising her voice at the children.  Well, of course not.  She's not stupid, she knows she's being watched.  Mrs. Earley also told me today, that if there was a conduct problem I needed to take it up with the principal.  Well, this would've been nice to know last week.  Now she's wasted a week of my time and has allowed my son to go into this woman's class that in my opinion is not the best suited teacher for him.  She also informed me that I could not change his teacher, and as a parent I had no say so in who was to be his sp. ed. teacher.  I requested the meeting with the principal. 

Am I wrong for not wanting this woman teaching my child?  From what my son has told me she's not the type of person that was agreed upon at his IEP evaluation meeting last year.  Her conduct is completely unprofessional.   What kind of teacher tries to pit children against their parents. 

Oh and yes, I bought him the biggest happy meal I could find.  I seriously thought about sending one to Mrs. Furor, but I didn't want to stoop to her level. 

Should I quit my job and home school if I can't get this situation resolved or should I have them take him out of the reading class all together and hire a tutor. 

I looked into the private schools in the area, but they don't have any openings. The private school's classrooms get smaller as the grades increase.  It's hard to get a child in for second grade if they didn't start there in Kindergarden, not to mention I have a first grader as well that I would have to switch over.   None of the schools in this district are ideal as far as scores go, they're actually pretty terrible, so changing to one of them would be no better acedemically.  Until we are able to sell the house and move, we're kinda stuck with the terrible school system here.  

[MSugarKane]

Oct. 16, 2009 at 6:30 AM

You need to find a level of communication that is going to work better with the teacher and your own child.  Talking in person to her may work better then notes to her.   Face to face, eye to eye.  Translations can be lost between phone calls, and note writing.   Have the child right with both of you so he can say his side of the story if the stories dont' connect.   Work with the teacher, not against her.