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A Tale of Two Shoes...Or how to Make Mommy have a Mental Breakdown before 8:00AM.
- Oct 20, 2009 at 10:32 AM
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- Comments (11) Total Views (186) Everyone can see this journal post.
They came into the world-together. Two shoes cut from the same cloth, sharing the same die lot number, sole mates...But, their fate, altered by irresponsible children who could not remember to put them in the ONE assigned home for footwear were separated...for an eternity in shoe years.
Yesterday, the Mommy of the house boldly went where no mother likes to go-under a child's bed, reeking of dirty socks and things better left unidentified. And low and behold, the missing shoe was found!
Today, two girls claimed ownership of this pair of shoes. Two girls threw deadly accusations of who was the one who lost the missing shoe. Two girls who owned a gazillion other shoes both wanted to wear the coveted shoes-at any cost.
After trying to reason with the two (a totally lost cause!), I grabbed one of the shoes and held it ceremoniously in the air, inspired by the wisdom of King Solomon. "I will cut the shoe into two parts, and give half to each of you!"
This was the moment where the true owner of the shoes would step up to save the beloved shoe...we would then kill the fatted calf (or at the very least grab a Big Mac from McDonald's) and rejoice and dance and sing and...
Child one: Go ahead. Here, I have some scissors.
Child two: No, scissors won't work-try a knife or dad has some powertools in the basement...
In the next breath, child #1 saw a pair of boots and said, "Never mind, I want to wear these instead. Child #2 eyed the boots now held in her sister's hands. "No! I was going to wear those!"
I'm not sure who won the battle. Honestly, I'm not even sure if my children were wearing anything on their feet when they left the house because I immediately started rocking back and forth, clothed in multi-colored kitty pajamas and fuzzy blue robe. The last thing I remember was mumbling something about going away to find my happy place...
Tags: funny, siblings, shoes, how to make your mother have a breakdown first thing in the morning
Comments:
LOL I tell my husband if he ever passes away then the kids would not wear shoes cause he always finds them for us in the morning IF the kids don't put them where they go!
Oh my! This is my house nearly every morning! They are always arguing over the same pair of shoes. Now, I don't know if they would have willingly let one be cut up... but who knows, maybe I will have to try that next time.
LOL!! Poor Mommy...hope the afternoon is better!!
LOL!!! Oh, isn't it fun when you have two girls that wear the same size anything?? I have two that wear the same size everything, and they fight over shoes, pants, shirts, bras....
Awesome journal! :-)
Lol, this is the best shoe story since the one about the time you wore your daughter's stinky shoes. Love it.
The joys of motherhood...IN THE MORNING!!!!
Love ya girl...hope you have a better morning tomorrow. ;)
LOL! love it! sounds like our house in the morning! No one can recall where anything is, as they frantically rush around trying to get ready before the bus stops at the end of the drive...
Once everyone is gone, the peace and quietness that settles over the house is comforting. Knowing I have at least 8 hours until havoc returns, along with squabbles, whining, starving kids, and a hubby who doesn't understand that in his best interest it would be better to keep his mouth shut in a home full of females!
LOL ...Every time you write these journals that make me laugh or giggle or smile , I remember that I no longer have to deal with what ALL you Moms who have young children deal with on a DAILY basis...
I do NOT know how you ALL handle it!!!
However : As I always have it does make me laugh and remember the olden days....!!!
LOL!!! You always make me laugh!!! Have a Blessed Weekend!!!
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Oh welcome to my world sister!!! I only have ONE child and we go through this every morning!!!
But alas, I have found the culprit, believe it or not(and most of you won't!), Our dog has "separation issues". Every morning after his morning whiz, he runs back into the house, grabs a shoe and "burys" it in the blankets. Yes, you read that correctly. It wasn't until I with held Allowance from my dear son and demanded he make his bed every morning that we wouldn't find said shoe!!