Just a little depressed vent

[NDesmond]

I'm worried that I'm getting depressed. Winter is starting to set in and I find myself with very little free time. I am stretched thin between my duties as a single mother, work, school, relationship, family, stress, housework, etc.  It's like I have virtually no "me time" and thus no time to recuperate lost energy (both physical and mental... and sleep doesn't count). It wouldn't be so bad except my social life is less than nonexistent. I'm trying hard to make mommy friends (female friends that are also moms, and who understand what it means to be a mom, that way they "get it"). Unfortunately, this isn't going well... A few of us from one of my CM groups have been trying to get together, succeeding only once and failing ever since. Aside from that my social interactions rely entirely on my coworkers or social networking sites (CM, Facebook, MySpace)... and my boyfriend.

Although I love my boyfriend (we're now living together), I hate that he is my main source of social interaction. He has other friends that he hangs out with, which I respect, and I'll admit it, I'm a little jealous of. All of my friends seem to have moved away or never lived here to begin with.  So I'm stuck begging my mom to hang out with me on weekends, or trying to convince my boyfriend that a chick-flicky movie night together would totally rock...

I mean, I try, I really do. I want to make friends. I need to make friends. But for some reason something always comes up. My schedule doesn't mesh or their schedule doesn't mesh or we don't mesh... It really sucks. I hate going to hockey games alone, but I'd rather go out to a hockey game with just my son(who isn't old enough to carry on any semblence of a conversation) than stay home and do nothing. That seems to be my most recent scenario... Although, feeling alone in a crowd sucks majorly!

Anyways, I just needed to vent. Stress and everything has been getting me down a lot and I figure it's best to get it out than keep it bottled up and making me crazy...