I truly feel like the worst mother in the world.

[richardsgirl16]

 I truly feel like I am the worst mother to my children. Mainly my 3 yr old son. I have no patience and I have prayed and prayed for it and worked at it but things just keep happening that make all of my efforts to be patient fly out the window.

I will be in the kitchen making myself something to eat while the baby is finally asleep and my DS will ask for something and I yell at him to "hold on". All he said was "mommy, i hungry and thirsty" and I yell at him!

I will be taking a shower and he wants to talk to me, I yell at him "Go Away" and all he said was "mommy, I wanna talk to you"

I will be checking my email, he will come to me and want to show me something he built. I say "not right now" and all he said was "Mommy,I Make you something, come see it"

It will be time for bed. I will be in bed and he will come in and want yet another kiss and hug. I say "No More Kisses and Hugs, Its bedtime!" and all he said was "Mommy, I want a kiss and hug"

He will simply be playing on the living room floor and will make noise, I will yell "Go play in your room" just because my show I watch is on. All he did was play like a kid.

He will want to go outside, All I say is" No, I dont wanna go outside". All he wanted was fresh air and to play on his swingset.

Now, after all those examples, there is no way anyone can see me as a good mother. I am horrible. ever since my baby girl got here in August I have felt like my son is nothing but an annoyance and stressful. I yell at him all the time, I don spend time with him, I dont really feed him anything healthy because i dont feel like makin it. I spend all the smiles and laughter with my newborn and my son is neglected.

What should I do? Should I try harder. Should I jsut find a way to go to Therapy to talk out whats bothering me? I want nothig more than to be a good mother and I am far from it. I want to be the happy mother with the perfectly clean home, the great meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

I really need to figure something out before I hurt my son emotionally any more that God knows I already have...I am emotionally abusive to my son... For no REASON!!!!!!

God help me..............

 

 

[MSugarKane]

Oct. 24, 2009 at 8:27 AM

Number one...identify the problem...which you have just done.

Number two ...fix the problem.............each and every time the child comes to you , stop what you are doing and pay attention to the child.  There will be times when you can't get that drink exactly at the moment but you can converse with the child.   You can say, 'What are you thirsty for?  I like that too.  When I get done I will get it for you."   IF you are doing Email,  (its EMAIL, it can wait)   your child comes first.    If you are peeing,  that can't wait, but you can talk to the child during the process so the child knows he will be getting his drink in a few minutes.