Part 2 of -- and how its relates to MS

[mo222]

In my sleeplessness- last night i thought about photography- and the post/whatever you call this thing... yesterday

 My dh - In a very loving way- He's very sweet-<< My sis- adore her- and the DH>>

He tries really hard to make my world perfect- He does a great job-- He said -- Maybe its time to looking farther ahead- Maybe my brain will clutter that-- I want to be  creative-- with foggy interruptions--  HA its pretty foggy now..... come what may- im just going to take a ton of pictures  in the mean time...

Im thinking  if that is the case- it will really suck....<why is this biggest  concern right now?-  Maybe  he's right- But  the next meds could be super creative boost pills---  <<<just call this part baby steps into the reality of what could be....

Eye is a bit better today- I have got to stop missing pills.... I missed the seizure meds at 9 today= head hurts,,    <<note to self- knock it off>>

fell asleep about 3am- but i actually slept past 9- YAY

My dh who is so stressed out- is slightly crumbling under the weight of it all-- It will get worse before it gets better--

It cost so darn much money to be sick( even if you have insurance)-    We are definitely heading in that direction- w a capital B and he is taking it all on himself-  Not that we are heading into that situation right this second- As the bills mount and the job market stays shaky-  Things look scary down the road-   Most  of the things that are  unknown are scary....or fascinating depending on how twisted.....

This MS thing is just inconvenient- annoying and all around stupid-.. and its expensive...and its been like what a week   maybe pushing two-...id rather be spending the $$ on going out to funky bars and dancing the night away.  But  the bills don't hold off  to give you time to adjust to the news,,How dare them....

As for me being sick........... Ok, and....

This money... dh stress... My older kids freaking out and my family calling me every 5 mins to ask if anythings changed yet.... is getting old- and its been what 2 weeks...ugh-

Im my normal semi insane silly self..w my  crazy perspectives on the world .. fairly positive... w a bunch of dark and twisty mixed in...

The only thing that has actually changed- is  bills ok well a few more things...like actually being in the docs office more than once in the same month-... Anything else  is just what it is- another day in the land of Sue...with added bills...

.. I am still my normal pain in the but self- i just wish i could get them all to take a step back and think to themselves - its not that big of a deal...and when it is-------- if it is- they can freak out then.

ok family ..yeah you!- lets all chill..... call me a B*tch or something.... So i know you actually love me--:-))

all the mush crap has got to GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- yack.. oh and stop making cake...

Its  like im sick or something....I can't live in denial if your messing w my illusions.or delusions.... :-)) stop trying to shake me out of this denial that im in.... im not unaware - i choose not to care that much -

Im not going to freak out have some emotional break down and spend hours crying over what might  happen...Id rather cry over  the dog crap i  stepped in w my good shoes yesterday- 

Stop waiting for me to melt.... for me to just say omg poor me-- its more about POOR you- you have to deal with it right along w me...LOL...

i find it interesting how long the  many sides of me can talk about nothing to each other... apparently (we) I needed this more than i thought---  if the MS takes me into more- um- delusional place- this will get real interesting--

these are my people- well some of them..there are lots more but i have to actually find the pictures...

[LadyBast]

Oct. 24, 2009 at 8:02 PM

OK Sue you are a bitch, you said to call you that LOL and I hope I got a smile.. OK yes I am a bitch too.

Things will work out as they are supposed too, you know that but you are right even with Ins the meds and Dr bills still cost. I know this too. As I told you before I have a very good friend with MS and she has good and bad days but she is doing great. She has had it forever and is now about 65. Look at Montel he has it come on girl cheer up and tell the family also..

Hugs and I have a shoulder anytime. Love your pics, who knew you had such a Macro talent, I guess I did but WOW!

 

[mo222]

Oct. 24, 2009 at 11:10 PM

ah thanks- :-) I'm not really sad tho-I keep telling em its not that big a deal... to just go with it- My hubby has a guy who works for him and the dh gets to watch it pretty much daily- And,, well the progression and the things he goes through the dh is involved in-- so its in his face and drews a good friend and well it just suck for him

I love the bitch part- your truly in the zone when someone calls ya a bitch...LOL... SO thank you... xoxo

 

(Original Poster)