Husband has a TPO but his parents want visitation with my kids. Good idea or not?

[sistersage]

Ok, my husband is not allowed within 500 yards of my children or myself due to a domestic battery charge.  His parents want to see the kids and have sworn that my husband will NOT be there when they spend time with the children because he does not want to violate the order and go back to jail.  The thing is, his parents do not want to visit them at my home, they want to take them to their home for about 4 hours and then bring them back.  They do not want me there and they have made it clear that they will come and pick them up, that I am not to bring the children to them.  My husband has been acting super nice and sending things over for the kids like diapers and winter coats but I am wondering if he is just trying to butter me up so I will agree to send the kids over with his parents.  They said that my husband is currently seeing his therapist as ordered by the court but that they could not see anything was wrong with him in the first place.  By the way, they believe that I am making everything up, and even though I have witnesses as to the abuse, its all lies and their son would not do such a thing.  My biggest concern is that my husband has made comments on his myspace page that he wants to take the kids and move to Indianna (im in Ohio) with this woman he so in love with yet has never met. They just talk over the internet.  But this woman has told him that he needs to get the kids away from me and she would raise them as her own and they would be a happier family if I were out of the picture.  I have told his parents my fears that he will take off with the kids and they assure me that he won't do that.  His mom even said that I don't him very well if I think that he would do that.  Well, what I do know is that he has no job, no money, mommy and daddy have been supporting him since I moved out and if this woman in Indianna wants to support him he would move in with her asap! He just wants a woman to support him, clean and cook for him and take care of him so he can sleep all day and get up around noon and sit at the computer looking at porn.  That's what he did he whole marriage.  He quit his job soon after we were married and let me support him.  So at this point I don't know if it is safe to let the grandparents see the kids unsupervised in their home or not.  Hubby has since made his profile private so if he is plotting anything, I can't read about it.  I leave mine open so he can read it which he does, multiple times a day, but I post things like the kids need diapers or I need clothes or food for the ect...he usually sends a family member over with the things I request.  So in a way he is being a responsible father even though I am sure his dad is paying for everything lol.  But I still wonder if its an act to get what he wants out of me, THE KIDS.

[Gremlyn]

Oct. 27, 2009 at 8:29 AM

BAD IDEA... their story just irks me. They'll come get them, you don't come to their house... you know why? Your husband will be there! Holy shit, don't let them take your kids off!!! If they want to see them so badly, they can do so in their home!

[kkbird]

Oct. 27, 2009 at 8:54 AM

I agree..... if they want to see the kids they can do some with you present.  They need to understand your fears and concerns.  If their son was arrested and issued to stay away from you then there were marks on you which in return means He did put his hands on you. They wouldnt order him to talk to someone if they didn't feel it needed to be done.

until you go to court and establish child support etc, and visitation (supervised) then g'parents will do as YOU wish if its really about seeing the kids.  take care.  good luck

[sistersage]

Oct. 27, 2009 at 3:13 PM

THanks for your advice ladies. I appriciate all the help I can get.

(Original Poster)

[Anouck]

Oct. 27, 2009 at 3:16 PM

I agree with the PP's.... If they really JUST want to see the kids, they can come to your house to do so. All this sounds just a little fishy. I think you're right to distrust the whole situation.

Good luck!