Your past always comes back...

[Ezranight]

 And you can say that's not true, but when you least expect it, it does.

Good or bad, it always comes back.

And for once in my life the GOOD things have been coming back.

It used to be, when I was in school, not that long ago, actually...

That I got along with everyone...and I do mean everyone in my class...

But, for the most part, I stuck with the boys.  Still do to this day.  Not sure why, but they accepted me more readily than anyone else.  Oh, everyone else was polite and decent, but it was still not easy-going.  And the boys I spent the most time with, were the misfits.  There wasn't many of them in our school, but they were there...a hand full of them.  They were loud, crazy, and more often than not, in need of a bath, lol...but they were great.  But they needed friends, and I needed GOOD friends, not just acquaintances.

And over the year, most of them dropped out or transfered before we graduated...never to be seen or heard from again...

Well...there is always more, isn't there?

Here is where for once the good part of my past comes back to me...

 

Last fall, when DS started pre-k, I was left standing in the middle of a crowd of parents I didn't know, and was, of course, a little shy...

The first parent I got to know worked just up the road as a waitress, and was telling me about the guy she works with...she starts with how CUTE he is, and goes on to how much POT he smokes, lol...

As the weeks progress, she tells me his name, and how old he is, and that sort of thing...

Sure enough, if you can't guess, it's one of my guys...

I say nothing...until she comes in a week later, and wants to know why I didn't tell her, that I knew him...

I never thought to, honestly...I tend to think, if people want me, they will find me, and if they don't, then no big deal...

Then she tells me, how he won't quit talking about the concert we went to together, and the stuff we did...

He was always so indifferent in school, I never thought I made much of an impression...I guess I was wrong...

Fast forward to this past summer...

Playing around on Myspace, and get a friends request...4 of them actually...

From a family I was friends with...2 girls and 2 boys...I started off with one of the girls...she was sweet, but tried too hard to be tough...I was invited over for a day, and got to know her 2 brothers and her sister...

I fit in so well with that family, you'd have thought I was born into it, lol...

To be completely open about it, they didn't have much money, and were pretty disfunctional, but a great family, none the less...

And I'm sure you can guess, it was friends invites from all 4 of them...

The youngest brother, who isn't the little brother...is a giant, at least to me, lol...he followed me around school and for some reason thought he needed to protect me...I'm sure it was just the size difference...I was about 5'2" and maybe 130 lbs...he was 6'3" and about 300 lbs...hmmm...

Anyway, I saw him and his brother this summer, and he's now grown another 2 inches, lol...boy do I feel SHORT now...

But it was nice...it's been almost 9 years since I've seen any of them...but it's nice to know they were thinking of me...

Fast forward again, to this week...which is REALLY what got this post started...

I get ANOTHER friends request on Myspace...and one on Classmates...AND one on Facebook...ANOTHER on myyearbook...most of which I don't use, but when the e-mails came through, I couldn't help but look...

Here is ANOTHER of my guys...

I don't even REMEMBER when he moved or dropped out...I think just moved...

He had the LEAST friends of all, but the best personallity.  He tried his best to be 'normal'...you know, he could talk to anyone, and be a good friend, if you just got past the way he looked and talked...

He needed a bath, lol...and he was LOUD, very LOUD, and almost hyper-active...almost...

But he was a seetheart...

And out of no-where...it has to have been at LEAST 12 years, since I've seen him, or even heard anything about him...it was like he dropped off the face of the earth....

And low and behold, here he is in my life again...

Now married, with an adorable little girl...and of all things, he's a RN...

I'd have NEVER thought...

And here he is...coming back from my past...

And you know, the more 'popular' people...the ones that I played sports with, or lived next to, or rode to school with...are no where to be found...

I haven't seen or heard from them in years...well, except those wedding and baby shower invites, where they only send them, because they expect a gift...

And here is my past coming back...the good part...the part I really enjoyed...

Telling me, all of them, that I was a good friend, and they're glad to have me back around...

And I'm just glad to have them back...I'd have never lost touch with them, if they hadn't disappeared as quick as they did...most of the time, it was here one day, gone the next...

Now, I'm not going to say, that the bad parts don't come back...because they do...when I was still working, a few years ago, as a waitress, I was pulled into the office, and asked if I'd be willing to take a drug test...

Why?

Because a family that I'd known when I was in school, came in, and actually ASKED my boss if I was clean yet...

I've NEVER in my LIFE done drugs...I smoke cigarettes, that's the extent of doing drugs...I haven't even had a drink in at least 2 years...well, 3 now...I haven't Been to a BAR in over 5 years...since I found out I pg with DS...and before that?  Not really...

I would go to a bar to hang out with people I knew, and shoot some pool, but not to drink, I was the DD...

And here, comes a bad part of my past back...and looking back, I can see where it came from, but I'm NOT happy about it...

I was waitressing in the same place...I was a JR in HS...I worked there through graduation and a few months after, but...

I would work an 8 hour shift, after school...3 pm to 11 pm...I'd get out at 10 if I was lucky...and I'd come home, finish my homework, and get to bed about 3 am...I'd go to school tired, but I'd stay awake through my classes, and sleep in 7th period study hall...

But, in the morning, sitting in my car before school, I'd count my tips...my boss didn't require us to claim them...well, me anyway, because I was paid under the table, lol...

And so, it got around, that since I always had money, and lots of it...how anyone knew how much money I had, I don't know...and I was alwyas tired, and looked like crap, and whatever else they threw in there, that I must be doing drugs...AND SELLING THEM...

Yep...all because I had a job...

And when that family came in, and asked that question, I knew exactly who it was...I had turned down the son for a date...and he turned around, and told his family, that he wouldn't date ME, because of all the drugs I took...

Yep...petty stupid crap from HS brought forward, to years later...

And FF to 5 years ago...I was working at a factory, and waitressing...I was working 16 hours, most times 18 hours...withan hour commute both ways...

As it happened, people would come to me when they needed change for the vending machines...I worked right across from them...and since I waitressed, I'd always have a bag of 1's and change, and I liked that when I left work, I didn't have that bag of change, only 5's and 10's in my bag, lol...

And here comes ANOTHER person I went to school with...and the SAME thing happened...

Oh, she's on drugs...and she sells drugs...

I had to pass a drug test to work here...

And STILL, no drugs...none...

But, I'll stop there...

My past has been a checker board...good and bad...

But to be honest, the good outweighs the bad in most of it...

And recently, the good is in full force...

And I'm thankful for it...

Most believe that the things you do in your childhood and your teen years don't amount to much...

But that's not true...

It matters...maybe not until you're older...

But it matters alot...

And the little things that you think no one notices...

They matter most of all...

 

Tags: friends, past, life, good, bad

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