Is this a trick

[bgdvil]

Because there was no treats. Not this year anyway. No children in there costume no candy to eat. I had my first son when i was 16. That means with my own kids Ive been trick or treating give or take a year 20 years! Since i live in such a rural area I dint see any children out in there costumes.

First i tried to ignore that it even was Halloween, but as the day went on it seemed to creep up on me. My friends were over and in a split second i had to excuse myself. I went and sat in my room. I thought to myself I wonder what he would of been this year? Would it be another year of something bloody? He definitely was over the cute faze. He thought he was to big for me to pick out his costume. When you have more than one child sometimes well a lot of times you think to yourself I have already done this before, or i cant wait in-till I don't have to do this again. When you loss a child you cant help but think If only I could do it one more time.

[Lb128f]

Nov. 3, 2009 at 2:42 AM

I'm sure you do feel that way...a million times over. I'm sorry...I wonder what Symon would have chosen too. More holidays are coming...do you all have plans? I'm sure staying busy will help a little...maybe doing something special for Symon? The first year after my Brother lost his daughter he gave gifts to a shelter in her name, we made a special ornament for the tree (that we use every year) and we looked for ways to help others who had more recent losses than us. The holidays are pretty tough...I hope you will be with friends and family. Keeping you, Symon and your family in prayer.

[shell81]

Nov. 3, 2009 at 12:36 PM

I am sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers.

HUGS

[shannipoo714]

Nov. 3, 2009 at 6:34 PM

I'm so sorry

[saltycoqui]

Nov. 3, 2009 at 11:45 PM

Thank you for sharing with us. I try to appreciate what seems like little things while my kids are still young. HUGS

[Angellinda]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 10:00 AM

I'm so sorry for you loss! We live in the rural too! No children in costumes. My DD & her  children nearly didn't Stop! Since they didn't see my Car home! Then remembered my Car Quit on me & isn't home or running. I miss seeing kids too! I have some Friends that lost their children. My heart aches for them! But find the words hard to express. Because I don't think there are enough words. But my Care is there! My care is with you!!

[kimmie1019]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 10:54 AM

Wow, I thank you for sharing that-even though it must have been hard, you and your family are in my thoughts, always! And to alll the other mommies that lost their babies. Even if they are 20, 30, or 16, they are always our babies!

[MikesMom1991]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 10:57 AM

I am so sorry. I can't imagine your loss. I worry about losing any one of my children almost every day, especially with my youngest in bootcamp now.  Take joy in the time you had with him and the joy still ahead of you with those you still have in your life. Huge hugs.

[prz2him]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 11:12 AM

I have not lost a child but lost my husband to cancer when my kids were 6,14 and 16. The thing I always hated to hear people say is really the truth...it does take time. The pain dulls and the memories fad a bit...til a smell or a picture or a sunset brings them back. Keep hanging on!!!

[medicmom67]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 11:54 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I haven't lost a child, but I did lose my best & only friend.  His son was only 8 months old when he died.  My lil guy is 3 & every time my lil guy does something, or the holidays are around, I can't help but think what my friend never got to see...   =(

[outofmymind26]

Nov. 4, 2009 at 1:11 PM

I am so very sorry for your loss. No words will make it easier. Sending you a big hug!