A bit late but still funny.

[The_Green_Farie]

The word "occult" means "secret." The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:

* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
* Revel nights
* Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
* Release of "time-released" curses against the innocent and the ignorant.

Another abomination that goes on behind the scenes of Halloween is necromancy, or communication with the dead. Séances and contacting spirit guides are very popular on Halloween, so there is a lot of darkness lurking in the air.

Kimberly Daniels, cbn.com

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"The word "occult" means "secret."

Well you get points for knowing the correct etymology of "occult" at least. Oh, and so does the "amen" at the end of prayers.

"Sex with demons"

Dammit! Why am I never invited to such cool Halloween parties?

"Orgies between animals and humans"

1) People who want to have sex with animals are unlikely to wait for a specific date to do so. 2) Keep your sick fantasies to yourself.

"Animal and human sacrifices
Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies"

So where are the news reports that this is happening on Halloween nights? These of course don't happen or happen rarely, but that's ALL THE MORE EVIDENCE THAT THEY'RE TRYING TO HIDE IT, right? I've actually heard people make these claims in real life. The crazies usually claim there's a massive conspiracy among media, law enforcement and government to keep the reports of human sacrifices, massacres, molestations, rapes and orgies under wraps, or to keep them from being connected to the occult. As a result, in their minds, the utter lack of news of any of these events happening on a wide scale actually becomes proof that they're really occurring.

"Revel nights"

They're called parties. Lighten up and live a little.

"Conjuring of demons and casting of spells"

Aside from the fact that those are not real at what level does the Dungeon Master teach us the real spells?

"Release of "time-released" curses against the innocent and the ignorant."

You've seen too many pharmaceutical commercials. Ignorant? If you only knew.

"necromancy, or communication with the dead. Séances and contacting spirit guides"

Dont alot of you Christians claim to have personal relationships with Jesus... who died on the cross and claim to converse with him regularly, too...?

"there is a lot of darkness lurking in the air."

Yeah, it's called NIGHT - happens about once every 24 hours, for an average of 12 hours each (Averaged over 12 months).

Shoo, back to your dimension.

 

p.s. Heres more fun from Kimberly:

"Even the colors of Halloween (orange, brown and dark red) are dedicated. These colors are connected to the fall equinox, which is around the 20th or 21st of September each year and is sometimes called "Mabon." During this season witches are celebrating the changing of the seasons from summer to fall. They give praise to the gods for the demonic harvest. They pray to the gods of the elements (air, fire, water and earth).

Mother earth is highly celebrated during the fall demonic harvest. Witches praise mother earth by bringing her fruits, nuts and herbs. Demons are loosed during these acts of worship. When nice church folk lay out their pumpkins on the church lawn, fill their baskets with nuts and herbs, and fire up their bonfires, the demons get busy. They have no respect for the church grounds. They respect only the sacrifice and do not care if it comes from believers or non-believers.

Gathering around bonfires is a common practice in pagan worship. As I remember, the bonfires that I attended during homecoming week when I was in high school were always in the fall. I am amazed at how we ignorantly participate in pagan, occult rituals.

Kimberly Daniels, cbn.com"

[stringtheory]

Nov. 6, 2009 at 9:38 PM

Ha ha ha ha. Love it.