Civil Union VS Gay Marriage

[i.heart.rachel]

Some people have told me they are "all for" civil unions/domestic partnerships but don't want gays using the word "marriage". I get that, I really do. I get that you're protective of the word because you feel that God "owns" it. I don't mind gay marriage being called something other than "marriage". I just want the same rights. I think that's what a LOT of people don't understand. They just assume we are fighting for the WORD to be used. That's not it at all. Now, I am not speaking for the entire gay population because I'm sure plenty want the word "marriage". Me personally, I'd rather not share the word with so many homophobes. I would rather not share that word, because with it, there is a divorce rate of over 50%. Let us use our own word - call it applecake for all I care. Just grant us have EQUAL RIGHTS.

SO, next time you decide to say you're "all for" civil unions but not gay marriage, THINK about what you're saying. You're agreeing that rights should be denied to homosexuals. You're agreeing that they should be treated as second-class citizens, as others once were.

(Taken from about.com)

The Difference between Gay Marriage and Civil Unions

by Kathy Belge

You hear the politicians saying it all the time. “I support Civil Unions, but not gay marriage.” What exactly does this mean? Some even say they support equal rights for gays and lesbians, but not gay marriage. Is this possible? And why do gays and lesbians want marriage so badly when they can have civil unions?

First of all, What is Marriage? When people marry, they tend to do so for reasons of love and commitment. But marriage is also a legal status, which comes with rights and responsibilities. Marriage establishes a legal kinship between you and your spouse. It is a relationship that is recognized across cultures, countries and religions.

What is a Civil Union? Civil Unions exist in only a handful of places: Vermont, New Jersey and Connecticut. California and Oregon have domestic partnership laws that offer many of the same rights as civil unions.

Vermont civil unions were created in 2000 to provide legal protections to gays and lesbians in relationships in that state because gay marriage is not an option. The protections do not extend beyond the border of Vermont and no federal protections are included with a Civil Union. Civil Unions offer some of the same rights and responsibilities as marriage, but only on a state level.

What about Domestic partnership? Some states and municipalities have domestic partnership registries, but no domestic partnership law is the same. Some, like the recently passed California domestic partnership law comes with many rights and responsibilities. Others, like the one in Washingtonoffer very few benefits to the couple.

What are some of the differences between Civil Unions and Gay Marriage?

Recognition in other states: Even though each state has its own laws around marriage, if someone is married in one state and moves to another, their marriage is legally recognized. For example, Oregon marriage law applies to people 17 and over. In Washington state, the couple must be 18 to wed. However, Washington will recognize the marriage of two 17 year olds from Oregon who move there. This is not the case with Civil Unions. If someone has a Civil Union in Vermont, that union is not recognized in any other state. As a matter of fact, two states, Connecticut and Georgia, have ruled that they do not have to recognize civil unions performed in Vermont, because their states have no such legal category. As gay marriages become legal in other states, this status may change.

Dissolving a Civil Union v. Divorce:

Vermont has no residency requirement for Civil Unions. That means two people from any other state or country can come there and have a civil union ceremony. If the couple breaks up and wishes to dissolve the union, one of them must be a resident of Vermont for one year before the Civil Union can be dissolved in family court. Married couples can divorce in any state they reside, no matter where they were married.

Immigration:

A United States citizen who is married can sponsor his or her non-American spouse for immigration into this country. Those with Civil Unions have no such privilege.

Taxes:

Civil Unions are not recognized by the federal government, so couples would not be able to file joint-tax returns or be eligible for tax breaks or protections the government affords to married couples.

Benefits:

The General Accounting Office in 1997 released a list of 1,049 benefits and protections available to heterosexual married couples. These benefits range from federal benefits, such as survivor benefits through Social Security, sick leave to care for ailing partner, tax breaks, veterans benefits and insurance breaks. They also include things like family discounts, obtaining family insurance through your employer, visiting your spouse in the hospital and making medical decisions if your partner is unable to. Civil Unions protect some of these rights, but not all of them.

But can’t a lawyer set all this up for gay and lesbian couples?

No. A lawyer can set up some things like durable power of attorney, wills and medical power of attorney. There are several problems with this, however.

1. It costs thousands of dollars in legal fees. A simple marriage license, which usually costs under $100 would cover all the same rights and benefits.

2. Any of these can be challenged in court. As a matter of fact, more wills are challenged than not. In the case of wills, legal spouses always have more legal power than any other family member.

3. Marriage laws are universal. If someone’s husband or wife is injured in an accident, all you need to do is show up and say you’re his or her spouse. You will not be questioned. If you show up at the hospital with your legal paperwork, the employees may not know what to do with you. If you simply say, "He's my husband," you will immediately be taken to your spouse's side.

Defense of Marriage Law

Even with lesbian and gay marriages being performed and recognized in some states, the Federal Defense of Marriage Law prohibits the federal government from recognizing gay and lesbian relationships. This puts gay and lesbian couples who are married in a legal limbo. How do they file their tax returns? Do they have to pay the tax on their partner’s health insurance? How do they fill out legal and other forms, single or married?

Creating Civil Unions creates a separate and unequal status for some of America’s citizens. The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial court ruled that creating a separate class for gay and lesbian citizens is not permissible and that is why they have voted that only marriage equals marriage. The precedent was set with Brown v. The Board of Education regarding segregation in public education. Ironically, Massachusetts marriage law went into effect on the 50th anniversary of Brown v. Board of Education.

The United States Constitution guarantees equality for all. As you can see, marriage and civil unions are not the same. Creating equal access to marriage is the only fair way to ensure equality for gay and straight couples alike.

[KristiS11384]

Nov. 7, 2009 at 11:18 AM

Thank you!!!!

[JoJoVan96]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 3:53 AM

You're just as entitled to be married to your partner as I am to be married to my husband!  Everyone has the right to be able to marry whomever they fall in love with. 

[RunninRagged64]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 10:49 AM

Very informative!  Thanks.

[LuminousMom]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 11:27 AM

AWESOME! Thank you for posting this.. I know it likely wont make a difference to those die hard people but it should.. it very clearly defines the difference.

[beanielips]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 3:02 PM

Even without getting into all the legal aspect. (CU VS marriage).. there are A LOT of churches that have gay marriages that are NOT recognized by the legal system.

So, it seems that gay marraiges are already being done (by Christian ministers too!). There are also athiest that are married (so it has nothing to do with God).

It would make more sense to have Civil Union be the all encomapsing and leave marriage to the churches. 

[caitxrawks]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 3:37 PM

*brings out huge paper fan attached to a popsicle stick and fans self*

MMMHMMM! PREACH IT, HONEY! HAL-LAY-LU-YUH!

[TuMaiidiiTa.]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 4:00 PM

[DragonRiderMD]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 4:13 PM

Since there's such a thing as "separation of church and state", and marriage technically is (or at least was at some point in time) a religious institution...it really should be all or nothing. Give everyone the same legal rights, whether gay, straight, or anywhere in between, even if the word "marriage" isn't used -- or don't associate any legal rights with marriage at all. I'd rather see the former, personally.

[MrsT4765]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 4:38 PM

Since we have become sort of socialistic already & demand insurance, it is unfair to the gay worker not to have certain benefits. Since 'gay marriage' is a personal private thing, it is kind of unfair to deny it from a legal viewpoint.  My religious views may question it, but my ex-boss used to swear & I defend his right to free speech! Gay marriage, even to the most conservative religious person, should be better than taking the Lord's name in vain.  So, if you are against it, think about many things. I was raised by a single hetero mother most of my childhood & that was just as 'abnormal' as a lesbian mother. My childhood was unhappy.  If my mom were lesbian, would it have made much difference? It might have, but we don't know.

  I don't claim to have all the answers, but these are some random thoughts.  ((HUGS))

[older]

Nov. 8, 2009 at 6:34 PM

I have in so many occassions stated the fact that most gays don't care what you call it as long as the same rights are involved, great post!