I need to smile

[Momma_Halo]

So I decided that Christmas is coming early. I am going to start doing Christmas projects and make Christmas presents during this month. My husband even agreed to help me put up Christmas decorations and lights this weekend.

Most people would look at me like I am crazy or stupid. But right now I just need it to come early. It isn't giving presents or the whole shopping thing that makes me feel better. It is the music, the lights, and the one month I can just breath and think that everything is going to be ok. It has been a hard couple of years for me and yet Christmas has always been that time that puts things into perspective for me and some how slows the world down so I can just breath.

I would sit with my step grandmother and make angel tree toppers from corn husks with beads and hot glue guns. Or making ornaments that just spark imagination.

It was the one time of the year my family got along when I was a kid. I would bake cookies, laugh loudly, and sit by the window wishing for snow. I learned about St. Nicholas through my studies and learned of generosity and love for one another. And sit next to my siblings while watching Christmas movies.

The music would be uplifting and stir emotions in me that just made me forget all my worries. No other holiday really touches me the same way that this does.

As an adult now I added my own traditions of wonderful smelling foods that waft through the house, sewing projects that I give as gifts, music that gives me hope, candles giving off heavenly scents, lights blazing in the long dark nights, and the warmth I get from people who would normally turn up their nose at strangers smiling and waving while others giving money to those who need it most. Sometimes I wish every day was like December.

I even added a new tradition and have been going to church every sunday and can't wait to see what they have planned! I love my church so much. And I stopped buying presents and I now make them.

Heck I am the one who wishes for a white Christmas every year and has always wanted to go on a sleigh ride. And some how my house is always clean... another cool phenomenon that December brings.

Now if you will excuse me I need to go make paper snow flakes with the family.

[tericared]

Nov. 11, 2009 at 12:28 AM

Zoe and I just hung lights in the hallway last night....