I AM an emotional eater. And a serial killer.

[debra_benge]

I hate to admit that.  I am an EMOTIONAL eater.  Not a RATIONAL eater, but an EMOTIONAL eater.  I let my EMOTIONS rule my appetite.  I let my EMOTIONAL side decide what to put on my plate.  It beats up my RATIONAL side and my EMOTIONS rule.  Yes, I keep repeating that, hoping that maybe putting it a different way will make it sound better.  Hmmmm.  Nope, no luck.  It still sounds bad.

So, now I have to accept it.  I've admitted it, now I have to accept that.  I don't like "accepting" things.  I like earning things.  I know I've "earned" my weight with my abhorence of exercise and my willingness to let my emotions rule my stomach.  So now I have to "earn" my health back.

I think this is going to be a hard road to walk. 

I'm the type of lady that runs screaming like a madwoman when someone says that ultimately dirty word "EXERCISE".  I always start out with "intentions".  Those "intentions" die quiet deaths, and often rather quickly.  I would have a massive graveyard on my property if I had to physically bury them.  That, or I'd be arrested as a serial killer...  Hmmm, not a good thought.  I'm a serial killer. 

So, I'm going to start walking the straight and narrow.  Actually, now that I think about it, I've already started it!  I started taking TaeKwonDo.  I have 4 classes a week.  My kids have 4 classes a week, and we share 1 class together.  Double bonus there:  exercise and family bonding!!  So, step one.

Step two.  Emotional eating.  I've decided I will clean out my pantry, fridge and freezer and keep only the healthy stuff, or the indulgences for the kids that I don't like.  Well, that's not quite true.  I'll keep a few small snacks for myself on the days when I'm seriously craving something emotionally driven.  I think I'll tap into the small, 100 calorie packs of chocolates.  I'm usually quite satisfied with a single serving, if it's pre-packaged for me. And I can't be the one doing the pre-packaging.  1 package will be enough.  You know, the WHOLE package...  Yeah, not good.

Step three.  I will find something else to do with my hands when I find myself led to the kitchen.  I'll drink a glass of water to fill my stomach and divert myself.  Hey, redirection works for the kids, why not me??

Step four.  Perhaps one of the most important.  I will ease up on myself.  I am my own worst critic.  I'm horrible hard on myself.  If I slip up, I kick myself black and blue, which increases the emotional toilet flush and I soothe the raw wounds with more of what caused those wounds.  Yeah, a real great soother.  So, if I slip, I slip, and I get back up on track, and keep going.  Slips are going to happen. 

I think four steps are good to start.  I'll get those four steps down as habit, and add to them. 

Perhaps I won't be a serial killer anymore...

[DianeMary]

Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:25 PM

I am working on the weight loss thing myself. I tend to be an emotional eater and put on 40 lbs during a bad bought of depression and then I put on another 40 from a bipolar med, I've take off 30 over a year, mostly from being off that med and then we switched to only drinking soda sweetened with splenda. We don't think much soda anymore but not having that sugar is huge. No portion control is our big one and I am starting slow on the exercise. I have bad knees and one of the meds I'm on effects my breathing so I get out of breath really easy. 

Its going to be hard and there are going to be ups and downs but you can do it, just try for small goals to start with and go from there. I wanna drop another 55 lbs but I try not to think of that number, I am focusing on the here and now

[MommasCooCoo]

Nov. 16, 2009 at 11:48 PM

Go For It.!!!!

 

My biggest (excuse the pun) words of advice...Find something to do ..that you LOVE LOVE LOVE.  Then it won't seem like that dreaded word..'exercise'. 

And...Most importantly...handle the real issues.  It isn't about the food that you eat...IT IS about 'WHAT IS EATING YOU'!   SERIOUSLY!

TAKE CARE AND GOOOOOOOD LUCK!

[cleanaturalady]

Nov. 17, 2009 at 2:53 PM

You can do it, Debra.  It sounds like you already have a good start on it.  Don't let your motivation die.

[LYNDELOU]

Nov. 17, 2009 at 11:45 PM

Debra~ Girl YOU can do ANYTHING that YOU set your mind to....I strongly believe that you can....

You've already taken the first step...Admitting...Then you ARE doing your TaeKwonDo which is great for you in for many reasons!!

Good Luck my friend!!!

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

[Sheila1970]

Nov. 18, 2009 at 3:32 PM

OMG Debra you can do it, I'm here clapping for you!!! Stay strong and good luck!!! Sheila