You gotta love the South!!

[Charmedmommy82]

You gotta love the South…….

 

Alabama

A group of  Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day.  That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked..

"Henry had a stroke of some kind.  He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied.

"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired.

"A tough call admittedly," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry."

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Georgia

The owner of a golf course in Georgia  was confused about a particular invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help.  If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"

The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."

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Louisiana

A 7^th year senior at Louisiana State University  was overheard saying, "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in  Louisiana .” When asked why, he replied, " I 'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana   20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world."

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Mississippi

The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!" Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?"

The young man answered, "No, but I got the license plate number!"

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South Carolina

A man in South Carolina   had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it.  Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back.  He asked the fellow what the problem was.

The man replied, "I have a flat tire."

The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"

The man responded very matter of factly, "When you break down, you supposed to put flares in the front and flares in the back."

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Tennessee

A Tennessee State Trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65.  The trooper asked, "Got any ID?"   The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

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Texas

The Sheriff pulled up next to a guy unloading garbage out of his pick-up into a ditch.

The Sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head?"

"Yep", he replied.  "That's why I’s dumpin it here, cause it says:  'Fine For Dumping Garbage'."

 

  

YOU CAN SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOUT THE SOUTH, BUT YOU NEVER HEAR ABOUT ANYONE RETIRING AND MOVING UP NORTH!